Improve your expressiveness and become a well-spoken girl

Improve your expressive power and become a well-spoken girl

Short stories and big truths

01

Speaking is an art

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Story: In order to celebrate his 40th birthday, I specially invited four friends to have dinner at home to celebrate.

The three people arrived on time. There was only one person left, and for some reason, he didn't come.

The man was a little anxious and couldn't help blurting out: "Are you anxious? Why hasn't the one who should come come yet?" One of them was very unhappy after hearing this and said to the owner: "You said it should come. "We haven't come yet, which means we shouldn't have come, so I'll take my leave. Goodbye?" After that, he left angrily.

One person did not come, and the other person left angrily. This person was so anxious that he said again: "You really left when you shouldn't have left." One of the remaining two people said angrily : "According to what you said, it's us who should leave? Okay, I'll go." After saying that, he turned around and left.

Another person lost his popularity. The owner was as anxious as an ant on a hot pot, and he was at a loss. The last remaining friend had a deeper friendship, so he advised this person: "My friends are all angry with you. You should pay attention to what you say."

The man said helplessly: "They all misunderstood Yeah, I'm not talking about them at all. "Finally, the friend heard this and couldn't hold it in any longer. His face changed drastically and he said, "What? Didn't you mean that they meant me? It's inexplicable, what's the big deal. "After that, he walked away with a livid face.

Main truth: Speaking is an art. Different word combinations and different tones will have different effects. In interpersonal communication, you must not make this mistake The birthday person’s mistake.

02

Use language that is acceptable and familiar to the other person

Story: Confucius was resting on the roadside. The horses loosened their reins and ran away to eat other people's crops. The farmer took Confucius's horse away. Zigong went to ask for the horses with Confucius' permission. Zigong Xiang used diplomacy and said. The farmer couldn't listen and refused to give the horse back to Zigong.

At this time, one of Confucius's group just worshiped Confucius. He asked Confucius to allow him to go and ask for horses. He walked over and said rudely to the farmer: "You didn't plant your land on the East China Sea, and I didn't walk in the East China Sea. Living people always live there." Are you going to meet? How can my horse avoid eating your seedlings? "The farmer was very happy after hearing this, and replied: "It would be great if I could speak like you said it. How convincing would it be? How could he be like the man who came just now, who didn't say anything for a long time? clear. "With that said, he untied the horse's reins and handed the horse over to the visitor.

Main principle: If you want to communicate with others, you must understand the other person and use familiar language that the other person can accept. Only in this way can the other party readily accept your opinions or ideas.

03

Three sieves for conveying information

Story: A man is in a hurry. He hurried to a certain philosopher and said, "I have some news for you..."

"Wait a minute," the philosopher interrupted, "You want to Has the news you told me been sifted through three sieves?"

"Three sieves? Which three sieves?" The man asked in confusion.

"First A sieve is more realistic. Is the news you want to tell me true?"

"I don't know, I heard it from the street. ”

“Now use the second sieve to review. "The philosopher continued, "Even if the news you want to tell me is not true, it should be well-intentioned. "

The man replied hesitantly: "No, just the opposite..."

The philosopher interrupted him again: "Then let's use the third sieve. Excuse me, is the news that makes you so excited important? ”

“It’s not that important.

The man replied sheepishly

The philosopher said: "Since what you want to tell me is neither true, nor well-intentioned, nor important, then please stop saying it?" That way it won't bother you and me. ”

Main principle: Think about the things we are usually anxious to tell others. Is it as useless to others and ourselves as the news this person wants to tell others? Perhaps, first use “true kindness” , important" sieve what we want to say, and we will find that many things do not need to be said at all, and there is no need to say it. When you control your mouth, you can control your life.