Humorous and concise self-introduction

Age: Not young.

Height: Very tall.

Weight: medium

Place of residence: home

Telephone: It's my treat.

E-mail: My friend applied for it for me.

Working hours: 8 hours

Apply for a position: 1

Education: If you graduate, you will have a high school education.

Language ability: Yes.

Interests: A lot.

Birthday: Not yet!

Experience: I stepped on shit when I first came here, shit!

I was a picket in primary school!

Married and unmarried: parents are married.

Future expectation: find a good job again

I hope everyone will love me. I am a mature man.

But I look young.

Big figure, giving people a feeling of big brother.

I have a successful career and am the boss.

Take a notebook with you everywhere.

My car is more spacious than Lincoln.

Years of edification in Peking University have made my cultural taste.

I study the ancient history of China in my spare time, especially the history of Qing Dynasty.

I also follow the trend of the times.

I often watch American movies.

Especially the social ethics films that discuss life.

I like to think about the psychological activities of movie characters.

I'm tired of dealing with high society.

So I often observe the situation.

I care about the details of ordinary people's lives.

Concerned about the wealth level of ordinary people

I pay attention to adjusting the inequality between the rich and the poor.

Aroused strong social repercussions.

I heard that someone wanted to interview me.

I've done too many such interviews before.

Go somewhere else to hide and be quiet.

It's good to cultivate one's self-cultivation

You know, people at my level will definitely not go by train.

But because I am so famous, the whole country knows me.

Or are you invited to do an interview?

And eat and control

Free fitness

I often surf the internet after I come back.

I don't have high requirements for my ideal partner.

When you come, I will give you a lot of ice cream.

I also want to build a family with you.

I will never be hard on you.

I will watch the stars with you at night.

Honey, come on, you will be satisfied at the first sight of me!

This description happens to be your dream girl, so you met on the same day.

After meeting, I found out that what he said was different from reality. But when I asked him why he lied, he took out his self-introduction and explained it to me sentence by sentence, only to find out. . . . . . (Please look down)

Annotation version:

I am a mature man-57 years old.

But I look young-I have pimples all over my face.

The tall figure gives people a feeling of big brother-Song Wu's big brother.

I have a successful career. I am the boss-the owner of a cold drink stand.

I take my notebook with me everywhere-it's a notebook to record the sales of cold drinks.

The car I take is more spacious than the Lincoln bus.

Years of edification in Peking University have made my cultural taste-I once sold cold drinks by the unnamed lake.

In my spare time, I study the ancient history of China, especially the history of Qing Dynasty-I like watching Princess Zhu Huan.

I can also keep up with the trend of the times-I know what kind of cold drinks will sell well this year.

I often watch American movies-American porn.

Especially incest porn, a social ethics film that explores life.

I like to ponder the psychological activities of movie characters-I often fantasize that I am the hero of porn.

I'm tired of dealing with the upper class-the president of Peking University told me many times:

"No stalls are allowed by the lake!"

So I often observe the situation-I want to set up a stall in a residential area.

I pay close attention to the details of ordinary people's lives-see whose doors and windows are not closed well.

Concerned about the wealth level of ordinary people-

I pay attention to adjusting the inequality between the rich and the poor-take valuables home.

Has aroused strong social repercussions-

Anger and fear

I heard someone wanted to interview me-the police wanted to arrest me for questioning.

I've done too many such interviews before-I've been arrested many times.

I went somewhere else to hide, to be quiet-to escape.

Just cultivate your self-cultivation-repair the wound when jumping out of the window and raise a few sexual partners.

You know, people at my level will definitely not take the train-take a tricycle to Tianjin.

But because I am famous, the whole country knows that I am on the "National Pursuit" website of the Ministry of Public Security.

I was also invited to do an interview-I was finally caught.

Also eat and live-three years in prison.

Free fitness-labor reform.

I often surf the internet after I come back-I've been looking for 4 19.

I don't ask much of my ideal partner-as long as I'm taller than me.

I'll give you a lot of ice cream when you come-

I want to build a family with you-you want to help me build a cabin.

I will never give you a hard time-impotence for many years.

I want to watch the stars with you at night-the hut has no roof.

Honey, come on, you will be satisfied at the first sight of me! -I don't want to watch it anymore.

Tenth place: Duke of Lushan, Wei Xiaobao

Interest index: 8

Practical index: 7.5

"My name is wu, is the eunuch in the palace. Everyone calls me' my husband'. "

Although this sentence was made to take advantage of Fang Yi, it is a portrayal of Wei Xiaobao's legendary and contradictory life: since he is a eunuch, how can his husband say it? Even if there is, it is also empty.

Wei Xiaobao's life experience is rich, including eunuch, Sir Alex Ferguson, Zen master, incense master, White Dragon envoy and so on. At the same time, he was the apprentice of Doctor Hai, Kangxi, Chen Jinnan, Hong Antong, Jiu Nan and others. He mediated in the court Jianghu and wandered at home and abroad. Wei Xiaobao was really like a duck to water! His legendary experience is simply a living teaching material for interpersonal communication!

This sentence is similar to what Yang Guo said to Guo Jing in The Condor Heroes: "My name is Ni, and my name is Suizi".

Fang Yi soon woke up and said, "I know your name is Hu, and your name is eight characters!" " , so the practical index is low, ranking tenth.

This is the most embarrassing self-introduction

"

Ninth place Zhu Ziliu's Legend of the Condor Heroes

Interest index: 8

Practical index: 8

"It's not difficult, it's not difficult. I have a poem about the origin of my family here. You can guess by typing four words. "

"Six meridians are accumulated in the chest for a long time, and a sword in the hand for ten years ..." "Xinghua has a horizontal head, which may reveal the secret. Kind of like a bucket, but it's half covered with nothing. After writing the name, I will wait for the crown to return. Do you know the true face? "

Zhu Ziliu, one of the four guards of Yuqiao, was conceited and well-read, but he came up with such a dirty riddle. As an introduction to self-identity, I didn't expect Huang Rong to be eloquent and blurt out the service road:

"Under the word" six ",a" one "and a" ten "are both" Xin ". The word' apricot' is a negative word with a cross and a mouth. Half a word' Lin' plus' big' plus a little is a word' shape'. " "Duan" is a "yuan" word. Xin Wei is the champion, and he has no respect for people. He turned out to be the champion of Sinvik. "

I didn't expect Huang MM to be a master of "short message riddle" and "swan riddle"!

This is the most obscure self-introduction

Eighth place Zhang San's "Chivalrous Man"

Interest index: 8.5

Practical index: 8

The fat man coughed and said, "My name is Zhang San, a little older than this brother Li Si. Little brother, you have no name or surname. How can you become sworn to us? "

This fat man with a round face and big ears, wearing a bronze brocade robe and an affable smile is really cunning. The name of his newspaper is widely known as "Zhang Li San Si", but he has no name at all. His oath is even more insincere. On the contrary, it was Shi's sincere oath that made the two ambassadors feel a little sorry for rewarding good and punishing evil.

In the end, the two men gradually changed from hostility to vigilance, and then became bosom friends, and staged a touching scene of Xiake Island drinking Laba porridge together, without concealing their demeanor and tolerance as contemporary masters!

This is the most hypocritical self-introduction.

Seventh place Bao Butong's "Dragon"

Interest index: 8.5

Practical index: 8.5

"Well, this is the beggar Joe wang? Brother Bao, you must have heard my name. "

Bao Butong is definitely a "man of God", playing the devil's advocate with others. He said, "As for the next place, it is British but not handsome, but the general heroic spirit is ugly, which can be called ugly." Arrogance and exaggeration are its characteristics. Although he liked to talk wildly, he was unambiguous at the big festival and eventually died at the hands of a son who was raised and assisted since childhood.

People are not, "no! No! " That voice is still in my ear.

This is the most arrogant self-introduction.

Sixth place Qiu "Legend of the Condor Heroes"

Interest index: 8

Practical index: 9

"The old man's surname is Qiu and his first name is Qian Qi."

This ridiculous eldest brother pretends to be the second brother's name and pretends to say, "I haven't walked in the Jianghu for more than 20 years, but I'm afraid others have forgotten it long ago!" Thick-skinned, thicker than a wall!

And his tyrannical third sister is even more unreasonable, thinking that "it is convenient for big brother to borrow his second brother's name when he goes out for a walk." They look alike and are brothers. What's the big deal about borrowing a name? "

I accepted boredom: how can there be such a big gap in life between three brothers and sisters living together?

This is the most brazen self-introduction

Fifth place Lan Fenghuang "the legendary swordsman"

Interest index: 8.5

Practical index: 9

"I am the Five Immortals of Yunnan, not under the blue leader."

The sanctimonious Yue Buqun didn't understand, "Among the five immortals, except Lan Fenghuang himself, which one is not a subordinate of Lan Fenghuang?"

Phoenix is full of qiangbai, plus Gu Tao's Six Immortals, and it is about to run on Yue Buqun. The hypocrite's face is almost the same!

Lan Fenghuang does not appear in many books, but his frank and enthusiastic nature makes me full of yearning for Miao village sightseeing. I hope the reality is not too bad, huh!

This is the most interesting self-introduction.

The fourth place is "Yuanyang Dao" by Gai Yiming.

Interest index: 9

Practical index: 9

"Catch the toad in eight steps in the lower area, turn to Zhu, walk through the snow without trace, fly on one foot, and cover seven provinces with two thorns!"

What impressed me most about this novel is the clown, who always tells the truth quickly. He is mentally retarded, but he hasn't lost his loyalty. He didn't blame himself for his low kung fu, but "these bastards are so careless that the reputation of our four heroes can't be retired." What can we do? "

When Xiao Zhonghui pretended to kill their eldest brother Xiaoyao, he was no longer timid, but "walked over to Xiaoyao and stood up, which was actually a neck to be slaughtered": "The girl killed my eldest brother, and my three brothers didn't want to be the only child, so they let the girls kill them together. Anyone who frowns is not a hero! "

His desire to "be a good China person" is endless!

This is the funniest self-introduction

Third place Ding Dian's "Liancheng Tactics"

Interest index: 9

Practical index: 9.5

"My surname is Ding, I can't read Ding, and I have three graves and five yards."

Illiteracy and three graves and five yards, two diametrically opposite words, are actually used on one person!

Ding Dian itself is such a contradictory unity, with great martial arts and extraordinary love, but the people he loves would rather bow down to prison, which makes people feel deeply admired!

This extraordinary introduction revealed clues to his shocking life.

This is the most contrasting self-introduction!

Second place: The Condor Heroes by Gongsun Lue.

Interest index: 9.5

Practical index: 9.5

"My father's surname is Gongsun ..." "My father once named his only daughter Green Calyx."

"Beautiful and refined, it has its own purity." Miss Gongsun's beauty is in name, in people and in heart, and she doesn't touch the slightest worldly spirit. She introduced herself in a unique way, but when she walked around, a pure and lovely little girl stood in front of her!

Why is Jin Yong so cruel? I also have feelings for Yang Guo: Guo Fu has finally found his place, and he can live in seclusion in Jianye. What's so sad about Sun!

This is the most nifty self-introduction!

First place: Duke of Lushan, Chen Jinnan

Interest index: 0

Utility index: 1000000

"My real name is Chen Yonghua, forever and ever, China!"

No carving, no exaggeration, only simplicity and dignity!

This sentence is a brilliant portrayal of Chen Jinnan's life, and he deserves to be ranked first!

May all people in China remember this sentence: Forever and ever, China, China!

This is the most touching self-introduction. I suggest you go to/thread-27610-1-1.html to have a look. There are many recruitment information of fresh graduates and various self-introduction materials for job interviews. Go and have a look. I believe these can help you!