Funny baggage jokes in 2017

Jokes are a form of artistic expression that express emotions in an obscure way. The following is the funny baggage jokes I compiled in 2017. I hope it will be helpful to you!

The most popular jokes in 2017

Starving is the thing. If you do it well, it's called losing weight; if you do it well, it's called massaging; if you do it well, it's called being in a daze; if you do it well, it's called deepness; if you do it well, it's called enjoyment; if you do it well, it's called persistence; if you do it well, it's called persistence "Pretending to be stupid, if done well, is called being wise and foolish."

If marriage is the tomb of love, then blind date is to look at the feng shui of the tomb, confession is to dig one's own grave, marriage is to sacrifice one's love, to fall in love with another person is to move the grave, and the third party is to rob the grave.

I originally wanted to eat my sorrow one bite at a time, but unexpectedly I ended up getting fat one bite at a time.

Obesity is a breathing pain, it lives in every corner of my body. It hurts to eat KFC, McDonald’s, even drinking water. Obesity is a breathing pain, and it flows in the blood. Scrolling back and forth, it hurts if I regret not losing weight, it hurts if I hate not dieting, and it hurts the most if I want to lose weight but can't.

What is romance? It’s knowing that she doesn’t like you, but still giving her 99 roses. What is waste? It’s giving her 99 roses even though you know she likes you.

It's okay to bask in the sun. Maybe no one will call you an idiot after you get tanned.

It's really troublesome to meet strangers and have to tell lies again.

Spreading rumors, a good job is called hype; sleeping, a good job is called dream stealing; flattery, a good job is called praise; father, a good job is called Li Gang; cheating, a good job is called calmness; low self-esteem , doing well is called humility; narcissism, doing well is called personality; streaking, doing well is called art; working to death, doing well is called sacrifice; working, doing well is called entrepreneurship; commenting, doing well is called originality; doing a side job , well done called a friendly show.

The most popular jokes of 2017

You lean on me lightly, touch my tender skin with your slender hands, and suck my body fluids with your gentle mouth until you are satisfied and drift away. Leave! Oh, damn mosquitoes

Yesterday you went to play in the mountains and met a wild boar that wanted to eat you. At this critical moment, you shouted: Mom. The wild boar was startled: Baby, don't run around anymore. Look, you're all so thin.

The son sang loudly while taking a bath. Mom: What time is it, baby? Keep your voice down, I’m afraid I’ll attract the wolf. ?Daughter:?You praise him too much. He can only scare away the wolf!?Have you ever heard the story of the big pig saying yes and the little pig saying no?

Why do you With tears in your eyes, why are you trembling slightly when you look at me? I know, and you also know, we have the same answer in our hearts: You not only miss me, but also? Don’t think blindly, I mean you It's cold too!

One day, the elephant accidentally trampled to death the ant family. Fortunately, one of them survived. It vowed to take revenge. Finally, when the opportunity came, it buried itself in the soil and stretched out a foot and said, "When it comes, I will trip it to death." ?

Don’t stop: keep chasing your dreams; don’t give in: after surviving the night, the sun will rise; the road is hard, sweat is a beautiful gift, remember, you will definitely get happiness, because--- You are a pig

Your mobile phone has been able to buy rice dumplings since the month. Order rice dumplings for delivery. If you have any questions, please contact our center. Website address. Don’t slip. Don’t trick you. Who can you try? Wish you a happy Dragon Boat Festival. Happy

One day, Xiaodong and Xiaoming went to play and saw a hole in the pants of the person in front of them.

Xiaodong said: That person worked so hard that his pants were torn; Xiao Ming said: That person must have farted so often that his pants were ripped open!

Your clothes are neat and environmentally friendly, your body is crystal clear and soft, your skin is white Smooth heart, rich and colorful, well-proportioned figure, sharp edges, fragrant smell, I like you--Zongzi

A family of three, the father called a robber, the mother called a kitchen knife, and the son called trouble. One day, the son suddenly disappeared, so the father took his mother to the police station. Tell the police that I am a robber and I brought a kitchen knife to cause trouble

Latest jokes in 2017

There was an exam when we were in high school. A boy sat in the last group and received I was so excited that I unfolded the answer given by a classmate. Just when I was about to make a large copy, I looked up and saw the invigilator walking towards him with a smile. He had obviously seen it. What this man did later became a classic for our whole grade:

He straightened up very calmly, looked directly at the teacher, then put the answer sheet on his nose and blew it hard, and then threw a parabola in a cool and unrestrained manner - until the teacher in the garbage basket behind the entrance stared at him. I finally didn't have the courage to pick up the evidence. "

The male classmate stood on my left, and the female classmate stood on my right. The others stayed still, but he did not move.

One day it was raining heavily outside, and the teacher's face was filled with tears. I walked into the classroom in the rain, and I didn’t know what I was looking for in front of the desk. After searching for a while, I asked the classmates in the front row: Where is the face I wiped the paper with?

Line segment a is half of line segment b , then how much is line segment b equal to line segment a? (The whole class was silent, waiting for the discussion. After a while, line segment b is the two halves of line segment a. (Halo)

In junior high school, a mathematics teacher taught equation transformation , rolled up his sleeves on the podium and shouted loudly: Students, pay attention! I am going to change my shape -?

A classmate was making trouble below, and our teacher said: "You stand on the blackboard!" Difficulty

My junior high school teacher likes to use the word "immerse" when talking about questions. The radius of my base is CM and my height is CM. Then someone below me said, "I am a loser and the whole class burst into laughter?"

Department of Chinese? Appreciation of wonderful articles and analysis of doubts.

Department of Economics? Asking about economic policy is like falling into smoke.

Department of History? When will spring flowers and autumn moon come? , how much do you know about the past?

Department of Geography? Thirty thousand miles east of the river flows into the sea, and there are skyscrapers on the Five Thousand Ren Mountains.

Freshman girl? There is a girl in the Yang family who has grown up and is raised in a purdah. I don’t know.

A sophomore girl? There are three thousand beauties in the harem, and three thousand people love her.

A junior girl? The flowers are ready to be cut, but they must be cut off. Broken branches!

Senior girls? There is not much autumn left, and the lotuses and willows have already faded.