What should parents do if their children get school bullying and ask for help from them?

When a child is school bullying and asks his parents for help, will you say to the child, "Think for yourself, why should he bully you if he doesn't bully others!" Or persuade the child to "leave him alone and stay away from him." Or think it's just a fight between children, ignore it.

In fact, school bullying occurs more frequently among primary and secondary school students than we thought. According to "Investigation Report of school bullying, China" released by the Professional Committee of Primary and Secondary School Campus Safety of China Emergency Management Society in May 20 17, the incidence of bullying among primary and secondary school students is as high as 25.8%. At the same time, the report also pointed out that verbal bullying is the main form in school bullying, and its incidence rate is significantly higher than that of relationship, physical and cyber bullying, reaching 23.3%.

Bullying is everywhere in this society, but unlike mature adults, children can tolerate people they hate. Their dislike of a person will be directly expressed, or directly attacked, abused or isolated, and so on. In the face of bullying, children often have no resistance and can only silently endure or inform their parents.

When a child tells his parents that he is being bullied, some parents may ask the child, "It takes two slaps to make a sound, so why doesn't he bully others?" Son, did you do something to others first? Or you might say, "How can so many people isolate you? Do you have any psychological problems? "In this case, it will undoubtedly add insult to injury to their children and lay a bomb for the future parent-child relationship.

Everyone came from the school days. At school, you don't like to get along with classmates, and you don't like to stay with a group of people. Over time, you are considered unsociable, guessed by your classmates and isolated. There are also one or two gangsters in the class who don't like learning. They like to bully you when they see you being bullied. I don't know what his psychology is. Maybe it's just boring and a little violent. It takes two hands to make a sound? Not exactly.

Parents are the people that children trust most. If parents don't help their children or even criticize and educate them, who can he turn to for help? In this way, children no longer trust their parents and are unwilling to communicate with them. In the era of frequent occurrence of school bullying, more and more children are left with psychological shadow because of school bullying, which affects their later life. Parents should pay more attention to their children's mental health and listen to their voices.

So what should parents do when their children are bullied?

1. The first thing parents should do is to communicate with their children. ?

Knowing that their children are bullied, parents can't judge their children's problems with their own experiences. They should communicate with their children and ask what happened. Don't deny their children at the beginning, and don't get angry when you hear that their children are bullied.

? However, communication also requires skill. Sometimes parents are very worried about their children, but the wrong way of communication will make children misunderstand and cause secondary harm to their children.

"Why do people bully you?" In this way, children will feel that their parents are blaming themselves. The correct way is "it's not your fault to be bullied." Don't blame yourself. Let's think about how to solve this problem together, shall we? "

? "Why didn't you tell me before?" In this way, children will feel that their parents are blaming themselves. The correct way is "You told me this, and you did the right thing. I think you are very brave. Don't be afraid. I will accompany you to solve this problem. "

"How did they bully you?" In this way, children may not feel the concern of their parents. The correct way is "I am distressed to hear that you have been bullied." Can you tell me when they started bullying you? " What did they do? "

2. Keep the children quiet

After being bullied, the child is likely to be in a bad mood, depressed, and feel self-esteem, inferiority and unconfidence. At this time, parents must appease their children and let them know that being bullied is not his fault, but that the bully is distorted. Parents will understand his feelings, be willing to listen to their complaints and work with them to find a solution to the problem. Parents should give their children a sense of security and self-confidence, spend more time with their children, and send them to and from school at special times. Be careful not to label your child as a "victim", which will not help your child get out of the shadow of being bullied and it will be difficult for him to return to his normal life.

Be sure to stand by and watch your children.

Knowing what happened, I found that sometimes children may accidentally say something wrong and do something wrong. Provoke other children, be bullied. Parents should not blame their children first, but should take them to the teacher first, confront the bully face to face and ask him to apologize, so that the child will not be bullied continuously, and then tell the child that he can't say or do anything, otherwise it will offend others. Let children know that if they do something wrong, they will take the initiative to apologize to you, but if you bully me unreasonably, it's your fault.

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4.？ Teach children to obey the law.

Some children will be distorted after being bullied. Will the bullied children influence them to compare themselves? It's terrible that the weak bully others! Parents should educate their children not to be bullied by others, but they should not be bullied themselves. In the long run, they are likely to commit crimes, teach their children to abide by the law, watch more TV programs related to the law with their children, and let them understand, abide by and use the law.

Deal with problems rationally

Parents should not teach their children to fight violence with violence after learning that their children are bullied, but should take up legal weapons to deal with the problem. If it's serious, you must take the child? Take photos of injuries as evidence, learn about the situation from teachers and children and classmates, communicate with the school after collecting evidence, ask the bullied children and their parents to give a statement, and supervise the school to take measures and take responsibility to prevent bullying from happening again. Don't be afraid to make a mountain out of a molehill We must thoroughly solve the problem and minimize the harm of bullying to children.

In the face of children suffering from school bullying, parents must protect their children as soon as possible. Before children can protect themselves, parents are the only places where children can take refuge when they are injured. Parents must not sit idly by. The physical injury may be cured after a while, but the mental injury, how do you know whether it will stay in your child's subconscious and follow him for life?

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