After the young couple quarreled, the man always complained, and his father-in-law said, "If you can't get along, let's go." Why?

Guide: There are contradictions and differences between husband and wife, which are best solved by their own communication. Instead of complaining to each other or their relatives and friends, or even complaining, let them be referees, which will cause trouble to others and make the relationship between husband and wife more tense.

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Marriage is not the same as falling in love. After marriage, talking about feelings is no longer just romantic and beautiful, but more full of daily chores and daily necessities.

You will find that love needs more and more concessions in front of life, and it needs more management and running-in than before.

When in love, both parties are in a state of excitement. Both men and women want to leave the best impression on their loved ones and spend the happiest time with each other. Men are all gentlemen, and women always look at men with stars in their eyes. Even if there is an occasional dispute, it is only a romantic episode.

However, after marriage, with the mutual understanding, the temper no longer converges, and the shortcomings are also presented one by one, as are the people who once loved each other.

Even quarreling about daily trifles, to outdo each other. A woman may be crazy about a smelly sock of a man, and a man may be upset because of a woman's chatter. Under the same roof, but nervous, full of gunpowder.

There will be friction in life, and people who love each other sometimes disagree, but some people will tell others about the contradiction between husband and wife, even their own relatives or the other's family.

Maybe it's to vent, or maybe it's because I think I'm right. I have to let others judge and put the other side under the pressure of public opinion, so I have to bow my head and admit my mistake.

But is this really good?

As the saying goes, couples fight at the end of the bed. It is disrespectful to the lover and the hearing party that two people have to involve others.

02

Some people may say that only women will haggle over every ounce, and they will go back to their parents' home to complain when they are wronged, but it is not. Men who like to "complain" abound.

Xiaoyu's husband is a special case of being good at complaining.

According to Xiaoyu, although her husband has passed away and is in charge of the company, he likes to complain whenever they quarrel at home.

Originally, a little contradiction between the young couple was nothing more than trivial matters, such as who washed the dishes today and whether to put soy sauce in the cooking. In short, there are too many things that can cause quarrels. In order to fight for breath, the two often give in to each other.

Xiaoyu felt that these small problems were not quarrels, but just a little dispute, and they were not taken to heart after the quarrel. After all, life still has to be lived.

However, Xiaoyu's husband doesn't think so.

He said to Xiaoyu, "You have changed. You are not the person you just met. You are not gentle at all. "

Xiaoyu said, "You are too lazy to be so surprised. You want me to be a nanny, and you haven't offered it to me yet. I can't be angry yet. You also want to be beautiful. "

In addition to arguing about who to do housework for, Xiaoyu has to take care of his salary card, which has also been argued for a long time.

Xiaoyu sees that he never spends money and makes a lot of money, but there is not much left. How can this go on? To put it mildly, she was given the salary card, but she was asked to take the money from time to time.

Xiaoyu asked him what he was doing, but he went out to eat with a group of buddies from time to time and sang karaoke. Xiaoyu felt that those meaningless parties couldn't go, so the two began to make noise again.

After several fruitless quarrels, my husband began to call Xiaoyu's parents, which was very painful.

After that, Xiaoyu received a phone call from her father, urging her not to be too tight with money. Men's entertainment still costs money. He also said that she was a little impatient and had to turn a blind eye. This is the way for husband and wife to get along, or what if the man was forced to run away?

Xiaoyu knew about it and her husband complained!

03

Is this the way to solve the contradiction?

Originally, the father was old and in poor health. The son-in-law greeted them, but told his daughter a lot and scolded her a lot, which made the old father at a loss.

How many things can't be solved between husband and wife, which should be known to everyone? Does this mean "I can't cure you, but someone can cure you?"

Xiaoyu was in distress situation, so she had to tell her father that they had a little quarrel and it was nothing.

However, the husband seems to see the "sweetness" from "complaining". Since then, when there is a quarrel, nine times out of ten, the husband will call Xiaoyu's home to complain, always saying that Xiaoyu is eccentric and let her father-in-law talk about Xiaoyu.

At first, Xiaoyu's parents would enlighten her son-in-law and persuade Xiaoyu, but after a long time and more times, Xiaoyu's parents became a little disgusted.

I thought, "Don't you want to get married yourself? Don't you live by yourselves? How about it, or is it the responsibility of parents to have an accident? " My father softened his attitude.

Father's attitude became cold, but they quarreled regularly but still didn't want to stop. Either for trivial housework or for economic expenses.

Quarrel can't solve the problem, and Xiaoyu's husband calls her father-in-law, which is another cliche.

This time, Xiaoyu's father said directly: "If you can't get through, just go. How much money do you have? " He was suddenly speechless.

Xiaoyu's husband was beaten by his father-in-law and never complained to him again. But then he actually called Xiaoyu's sister in college and said Xiaoyu was not good.

Xiaoyu is really speechless. He is so naive.

As a result, because her husband always complains, Xiaoyu's mother is always worried that their marriage will be unhappy.

Although most of the time, the two still live in peace, but in their parents' place, there will always be a shadow. My mother will ask her quietly if she is all right. Don't you contradict each other now?

You see, how much trouble it has caused to the people you love.

04

There is really no need to say too much to relatives about things between husband and wife. They don't know the situation, and they don't know what happened to you.

If there are contradictions, it is impossible to blame others for their "crimes".

If there are difficulties, it is more necessary for two people to work together, rather than complaining to others who is more wronged and who pays more.

The man in front of you is your choice. He has advantages and disadvantages, and so do you.

Why do you think he is so nice when you are in love, and sometimes you want to strangle each other when you are old?

Marriage itself has a process of growth and running in. With more understanding and tolerance, people will be more peaceful if they change their mentality.

For example, my best friend Xiao He complained to her mother from time to time at first. Later, she understood what marriage should be like, and she also knew something that she really couldn't tell her relatives.

When my best friend Xiao He just got married, he often complained in front of his mother. Almost as soon as they meet, she will speak ill of her husband or her husband's family.

Because I know that my mother loves her daughter dearly, whenever she has any grievances or disappointments, even small things, she will not spit them out, and her mother will try her best to comfort her.

Every time his mother comes home, Xiaohe talks to her husband and his family. Said that her husband doesn't like to do housework, and he is not as diligent as before; It is said that my mother-in-law comes here from time to time, just sitting there doing nothing and wanting Xiao He to go to work and do anything.

Mother heard that her daughter, who suffered from childhood, became a wronged kannika nimtragol in her husband's family. That's intolerable.

Once Xiao He's husband came back from work and was very enthusiastic to see her mother-in-law, but her mother-in-law was always cold and indifferent, and she didn't know what was going on.

Probably because my mother was too worried about her daughter, she bluntly questioned her son-in-law at the dinner table and blamed him for not hurting Xiao He. She also said: "Xiao He was raised by me and her father, not married to your family."

Xiao He's husband blushed and kept nodding.

On this occasion, Xiao He is also embarrassed. She thought her mother would listen, but she didn't expect the development of things to be out of her control.

After mom left, her husband blamed Xiao He and said, "Sometimes I really don't do well and ignore your feelings, but we are husband and wife. Tell me directly if you are dissatisfied. Why bother? " If I don't change my mind, it's not too late for you to apply for help. "Xiao he couldn't help laughing.

Xiao He was just trying to vent his emotions. In fact, she exaggerated some words. I didn't expect her mother to stand up for her face, which was embarrassing.

Thinking about her husband still has many advantages. Later, I learned that my mother-in-law had problems with her lumbar vertebrae and cervical vertebrae, so I got used to it.

Xiao He felt that he had a lot of things to do, which not only worried his mother, but also caused bad blood between her husband and family.

Since then, Xiao He has never complained to his family, let alone reported it to his family. Sometimes there are contradictions, but they are all solved by themselves. Compared with before, my husband is more considerate and Xiao He has learned to be tolerant.

05

In daily life, two people will inevitably have contradictions. Even those who love each other again will never quarrel and never blush.

The causes of differences and quarrels between husband and wife are more trivial than a few major events of principle. These trivial things, which are ubiquitous in life, seem to have nothing to do with oxygen, but they often become the fuse of war at home.

Only when two people manage their families and feelings well, face up to those contradictions and deal with them together can marriage develop in a good direction.

Things between husband and wife are best solved by themselves.

After all, they are all adults and the closest people. Why do they look at each other more and more unhappy, picky and aggressive because of a little thing? They even need to find someone next to them as a referee and complain in front of others to see who is right and who is wrong.

If someone else is involved in a quarrel, you complain to your relatives or the other person's family. Whether it is appropriate or not, will it make them worry and increase their troubles? What is the difference between this and a child who is not sensible?

Even with everyone's support, the contradiction will eventually be solved face to face by two people.

What's more, you have everyone's support, which often destroys the dignity of your husband and wife.

There is no right or wrong in emotional matters, even if it is judged by your relatives, it doesn't make much sense. No matter who they take sides with, they are wrong.

The way to reduce friction is that two people communicate well and take a step back from each other.

Of course, if something really serious happens and you can't solve it yourself, or the other party goes too far, that's another matter. And if this happens, your family and friends will help you kick him so that he can't turn over.

As for those who have a rough life, it is a matter of two people who have high feelings and low feelings. Please respect the privacy of yourself and your partner, and don't disturb others' lives easily.