Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Children's Day girls' four-person sketches should be funny and educational. It's not hard to remember. Come on! If it's good, add a reward.
Children's Day girls' four-person sketches should be funny and educational. It's not hard to remember. Come on! If it's good, add a reward.
Time: After the mid-term exam, there will be Chinese class in the morning.
Character: Teacher (Chinese teacher and head teacher) Students:, Shi Jinchao, Xia Mawei, Wu.
During the break, Wu Heshi is playing ball and Du and Xia are wrestling. )
Teacher: (standing outside the classroom) Remember those naughty students last year? I am their head teacher and Chinese teacher. By the way, they are in grade seven this year, but they don't worry me at all. Just a few days ago, I was angry with them, with a sore back and cramps in my legs, low pressure and high pressure. No, the mid-term exam results came out, and my blood pressure rose again! Take my Chinese as an example. Actually, someone got the highest score of all digits in the class before grading the paper in his hand. The bell rang and I had to go to class.
Wu looked out. Hey, class, a storm is coming!
Hello, strange teacher
Teachers and students, it's good to turn your back! Blood pressure is coming up again! Students, you didn't do very well in this midterm exam. Listen carefully when you analyze the test paper in the future!
Teacher: (handing out test papers) Du Ziteng, score; Shi Jin Dynasty, points; Summer ponytail, points; Wu is afraid of division. Teacher: Let's check the scores first.
Du: Teacher, mine is not a score!
Teacher: How many points is that?
Du: (embarrassed) Yes or no! You got it upside down!
S: Teacher, I'm not scoring!
Teacher: How much is it?
Yes
(Xia, Wu and Du snickered)
Teacher: (dismissively) What's the difference?
S: There's a big difference! My mother said that one yuan used to buy a catty of tofu, but now a catty of tofu costs one and a half yuan! Teacher: (holding the test paper for extra points) Here you are! (mumbling) Shi Jinchao, Shi Jinchao, you only copied points when you copied hard! (Pass the test paper to Shi) Tofu is for you!
Teacher: Let's take two minutes to sum up why everyone did so badly in the exam!
(The teacher turns around and the students chirp)
Teacher: Have you summed it all up?
S: it's summed up! Because the invigilator is too strict!
Xia: I think it's because there are too few multiple choice questions!
Teacher: Make it clear.
Xia: My English is not good at all. I got a score this time because of multiple-choice questions.
Wu, Du and Shi: How did you do in the exam?
Xia: (proudly) I wrote it on draft paper and tied it with compasses. I'll choose whatever I tie!
Wu, Du and Shi: You are great!
Xia: (proudly) I was better than you last time! I used a formula and got a score!
Wu, Du and Shi: What formula?
Xia: Soybean, fart, it stinks!
Teacher: (impatiently) Be serious! Let's analyze the test paper. The first problem is to pronounce the added words. Du Ziteng, see what you are wrong.
Du: Safe and sound (pronounced lamb), a generation of owl (bird) male.
Teacher: safe and sound, a generation of lean. Shamawi, what's wrong with you?
Xia: I've cut all the thorns, and I haven't heard from you yet.
Teacher: I've cut through the thorns, but I haven't heard from you.
Wu: Teacher, I am in full swing (tea). Is it wrong to take the lead (turtle)?
Teacher: It is in full swing, and it is the best! Glans, what is glans? Who wants to monopolize the glans penis is strange! (walks up to the stone and tugs at his ear) What's this reading for?
Your skin is (definitely) raw!
Teacher: How many times have I told you that your skin is rough? You are still raw. I really want to beat you up!
Teacher: The second problem is making sentences. Read a few sentences to everyone and listen to them yourself!
Du: After work, my father came back one after another.
He undressed and put on his trousers.
Wu: Very disobedient, always writing out of line.
It is really hot today. This is a good day for swimming.
Xia: Besides, a train passes by, again, again, again, again, again, again.
I like it very much. I like to drink "very coke"
Shi: It's a pity that the ten sisters only took math exams.
Sorry, there is a big ditch in front of my house, which is very wide and really difficult to cross.
Teacher: I really feel sorry for you, too! I hope to see your sentences again in the future, and don't make me sad! Students, idioms are treasures of China culture, and a few words can produce vivid effects. But to understand it correctly, we can't just look at the words and make sense. How do you explain these idioms? insist on
I know, it means that when you tickle, you can't tickle without bending your fingers.
Teacher: It's now or never.
Xia: The mobile phone can't fall into the toilet and get wet!
Teacher: Every day is like a year.
Wu: Life is very simple. Every day is like Chinese New Year.
Teacher: Cadence.
Du: Ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheepfold and one squatting in the pigsty. Isn't that "a sheep squatted wrong"?
Teacher: (angrily) Students, you are ruining idioms! Students, at present, our country is vigorously promoting Putonghua. The following question is for everyone to write an advertisement to promote Putonghua. What did you write?
Du: As we all know, you should speak Mandarin when you go out!
Xia: I won't rest this summer. I only learn Mandarin. Don't talk during the holidays this year. I can only speak Mandarin.
Wu: Since I have spoken Mandarin, my waist is not sore, my legs are not painful, and my body is much better. Ordinary people. I haven't told him yet!
S: When I used to speak dialects, my body was covered with little red pimples, but since I spoke Mandarin, all the little red pimples have disappeared. (undressing) Look here, look here.
Teacher: Be creative! Don't imitate TV commercials! You can read the following poem in Mandarin and Chongqing dialect respectively, and feel the importance of promoting Mandarin.
Wo Chun, I am so stupid.
Mume smells flowers, I have no culture,
Lying on a branch hurts and hates it to the end. I have low IQ.
If you hear me lying like water, ask me who I am.
Eduardo Chun Lv. A big donkey.
The coast is green, I am a donkey,
The coast is green, I am a donkey,
The coast is blue-green. I am a stupid donkey.
Teacher: The title of this composition is A Man I Know Very Well. You all write very creatively, which surprises me. Read it yourself!
Wu: My teacher. My teacher has an oval face.
Teacher: Wait! Did you write a melon face? It's claw face! You keep reading!
Wu: My teacher is really beautiful, really beautiful, really beautiful, really beautiful, really beautiful, really beautiful.
Teacher: Stop! It's nice that you write so much. Why? Just write it to the end!
Wu: Teacher, isn't the composition required to be no less than words?
Teacher: Then you can only be beautiful? It's a pity that you only wrote it.
Wu: If I had known, I would have added "She is so beautiful"!
Du: My grandmother. My grandmother has a melon face.
Stone: Is it also a melon face?
Du: Yes, but it's upside down. She is ten years old this year. Last Sunday, grandma took the catwalk to see the inauguration ceremony of the new playground in our school. Seeing so many people, grandma said, "Wow! I'm dizzy! ! This playground is so big! ! Can accommodate a buffalo! "
Teacher: Your grandmother speaks in fashion! How like the hero in Qiong Yao's novels. But the playground is for people, not cows! Keep reading!
Du: Grandma saw many people fighting for a ball and said, "Why don't everyone send one?" I think it's funny, too, but grandma has no culture and is not sensible. Now that our country is poor, it is too wasteful for one person to send one.
Teacher: Your grandmother can understand, but you can't forgive!
My brother. My brother is 10 this year. He is handsome and cool, and many people say that he looks like Jay Chou. When my brother comes back from kindergarten every day, the first thing he does is to play with Lingling, a little girl of 0/8 years old next door.
They jump together, sometimes build houses and cook together. I think my brother is prone to puppy love.
Teacher: Are you prone to puppy love?
Me? Why do you think so? Should puppy love wait until now? !
Teacher: How old are you? Say such a thing! Keep reading!
S: That's true. One day, I saw my brother and Lingling sitting on a bench in the yard. My brother said to Lingling, "I love you!" " "Then kissed Lingling. Lingling said, "If you kiss me, you will be responsible for me!" My brother patted Lingling's shoulder maturely and said with a smile, "Don't worry, we are not children of one or two years old! " "
Xia: My mother. My mother is forty years old this year. She has a photo.
Wu, Du and Shi: Is it also a melon face?
Xia: No, it's a "Chinese face". There are only some wrinkles on her forehead. Dad died early, and my mother barely supported my sister and me with a handful of shit and urine.
Teacher: it's a handful of shit, and a handful of urine has brought you up!
Xia: I like my mother's sweet potato porridge best. Yesterday, because the sweet potatoes were sold out, my mother didn't buy them, so she had to cut some taro to make up.
Teacher: You are ruining idioms again. It's sheer nonsense! I am so angry! Blood pressure is coming up again! !
Xia: Don't be angry, teacher. I'll change it! In the future, we must go through thorns,
Du: Go ahead,
Wu: Study hard and make our class the first in the school.
Du, Xia and Wu: Take the lead! !
Teacher: (gratified) Students, you have finally grown up!
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