After the death of an old man who has seen through the world, will the one left behind still feel sad?

Introduction

Even their own children may not be able to understand the depth of the relationship between an old couple who has spent a lifetime together. Some old couples seem to quarrel frequently and don't get along as well as we imagine. Is this really the case?

Yang Guoqiang/48 years old

My father and mother are together. Because my mother has a strong personality and wants to have the upper hand in everything, my father seems a bit useless, at least in my opinion, not a man. Spirit, sometimes I wonder how they got together.

However, no matter how good-tempered a person is, he will get angry. My father is like this. If my mother is really messy, he will also get angry and shout at my mother for a few words, and she will burst into tears and stare with tears in her eyes. One glance at his father made him stop arguing. This trick worked every time. It was simply mother's housekeeping weapon.

This old couple has been with each other for 50 years. In my opinion, my mother has been nagging my father for 50 years. Anyway, I don’t know what is good about such a marriage. It seems that my father has always been dislike.

Just last year, my 77-year-old father passed away due to illness. We were so sad that we sang loudly in front of the soul to express our grief for his father leaving us.

When I thought about whether my mother was equally sad, I looked carefully and didn’t see her figure at all. I was worried, so I went out to look for her, and saw my mother sitting in the yard, talking and laughing with relatives and friends who came to express condolences. The laughter was so harsh in my ears.

My dissatisfaction with my mother instantly surged to the extreme. Your partner who has lived with you for decades is gone. How can you still laugh? Could it be that the accusations you make against your father are all out of your heartfelt disgust?

Because of my thoughts, I felt extremely heavy in my heart. I thought that my father’s life was not worth it. He left and my wife acted like a normal person. She should talk and laugh. Can the old man leave with peace of mind?

When dinner was served in the evening, my mother told my sister and I who were keeping watch at the funeral, "You go to eat, I will stay here to watch."

We asked her to eat first. Mother said she had eaten, so my sister and I went to eat. I couldn't eat two bites, so I went back. As soon as I reached the door, I heard my mother's sobbing inside. I walked in gently. My mother was sobbing. She was holding her father's portrait in her hand and crying, old man, what are you doing? If you are so cruel, just leave me alone. If you are soft-hearted, take me away. My heart will be empty without you. I am willing to go with you!

My mother’s shoulders kept shaking because of crying. My tears also fell down, and I shouted “Mom” behind her!

When my mother heard me calling her, she immediately withdrew her hand from touching the portrait, hurriedly wiped the tears from her face, and asked me why I came back so soon and if I hadn’t eaten.

I said I had eaten and rushed over if I was worried. My mother burned a handful of paper money and told my father to go away well and not to worry about him.

Until my father was buried, I never saw my mother sad again. She was still the same as I saw that afternoon. She smiled when she should talk. No one could tell that she had ever been that sad. .

I saw my mother crying and her mumbling words to her father with my own eyes, so I understood that behind the laughter was her huge pain of losing her husband. Not showing it does not mean that she is hard-hearted, maybe in many cases When we talk about a person, we only talk about the person's superficial appearance. The real person is often only hidden under his own armor.

Later I understood this truth: Don’t just look at the surface of everything, because what you learned at the time was not the truth, such as: my mother’s feelings towards my father.

Conclusion

An elderly couple has gone through ups and downs before reaching their twilight years. Maybe they won't express their affection for each other, but there is no need to express the deep-seated mutual attachment in words.

The most grieving widow was Mr. Yang, who was able to relieve his dissatisfaction by witnessing his mother's last "conversation" with his father and re-understand his mother's inner world after she was widowed.

When an elderly person loses his partner, he will not necessarily cry in front of others. Instead, he will give people the illusion of being indifferent. At this time, do not accuse her of being impersonal, because you cannot see what kind of suffering she is really suffering in her heart. .

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