How to Cultivate Children's Self-control —— Notes on Emotional Intelligence Course

The brain area responsible for self-control is the prefrontal lobe, which has been active since the age of 3, so parents can help their children develop self-control ability from about 3 years old.

What do we mean by self-control ability?

Goal power, rejection power, action power.

How to do it specifically?

First, make family rules.

For example, the time of getting up and going to bed is stipulated, and the rules of buying toys, eating snacks, doing housework and watching electronic products are formulated.

Secondly, implement the house rules gently and firmly.

Dr. zhang suggested that parents should be emotional intelligence coaches of sheepdog type, not only caring for their children, but also educating them on the right path.

When children don't implement the family rules, parents should first accept their children's emotions, then gently explain the reasons and further firmly implement the family rules.

In the process of implementing the rules, when children continue to resist, they can say "I decided to abide by the agreement with you", which is conducive to children's acceptance. At the same time, encourage them to think about emotional solutions. If they can't come up with an alternative, "you can choose to eat a piece of candy or play with toys for a while after this."

After the child implements the family rules, he will affirm the child's practice for the first time. Remember the praise method mentioned before? Praise behavior plus praise characteristics, praise results plus praise process.

Finally, parents should set an example and enforce family rules.

Many parents let their children play mobile phones and read books while watching TV, which will obviously have a lot of bad effects on their children.