What kind of person will a person become after the most difficult and helpless days?

In front of my father's mourning hall, I knelt down and kowtowed three times, then turned around and took out 250 thousand cash, shouting: someone has something to do, and it's time to end today. My mother was so scared that she grabbed me. I saw my sister-in-law's face turn green instantly and froze there. Next to her, her brother-in-law held back for a long time and shouted, "I turned against you!" "

I am 40 years old, single parent divorced, living alone with my son and parents 13 years. To say that the major turning point in my life should be this decade. The ups and downs of the plot once made me think I was the heroine in Qiong Yao's love drama, but life is life. After the tragedy, I can change the ending through my efforts. From the debt of 1.5 thousand to the income of 800 thousand this year, I finally have the confidence to let those people go in front of my father's portrait.

0 1 is not an "optimistic" marriage

At the age of 26, I married a young man in the village. The wedding was simple, but it also hosted many relatives and friends. The groom and I made a toast table by table, and when we reached menstruation's table, an embarrassing scene appeared. We both hold glasses and smile to thank you for coming and look forward to your elders' good wishes. A table of relatives stood up, only my two aunts sat with a straight face and looked at the groom with a very contemptuous look, which I will never forget.

I turned blue with anger. Before I could speak, my sister-in-law spoke first: this woman's marriage is like gambling. If she gambles on food and drink all her life, her life will be ruined. It's hard to turn back. Sister-in-law said, looking at the groom with contempt and contempt, and glanced at me again.

Is this what my own aunt should say at my wedding? I blew it up and was just about to open my mouth and go back. The groom next to me took me and smiled and said to my aunt, Sister-in-law, you are right. This bet is really risky. You were lucky and won, but Xiao Gan and I were not gambling. We are living. I don't know if I am a treasure, but Xiao Gan must be my treasure. I will treat her well.

The groom said this, raised his glass and dried it. Sister-in-law's expression was embarrassed and her whole face froze. The relatives around her took advantage of the situation and smiled and sent us blessings. After the toast, I took the groom away. Along the way, he comforted me and promised to make money and treat me well.

I've been back for three days, and as soon as I entered the door, I heard my mother answer the phone. She put me on speaker. The voice on the other end of the phone is my sister-in-law's voice. "Small qian this is what attitude, marry a poor boy, certainly not for a long time ..."

Sister-in-law's voice is very angry. My mother is a kind person. On the other end of the phone, she just whispered "Xiao Gan likes it" and didn't refute it. I rushed into the door and shouted, none of your business! My mother hung up the phone in fear, saying that my aunts were kind enough to care about me, fearing that I would suffer, and told me not to think too much.

At this time, my husband was behind me and heard everything. He looked at me, then turned to my mother and said to her with tears: Mom, you are wronged. Don't worry, I will make Xiao Gan and your parents live a good life.

He's really not just talking. A year later, his family got the compensation for the reconstruction of the village in the city: four suites, 654.38+0 million. He also participated in several small-scale construction projects. Our son was born and lived a simple and contented life. But life will always be full of all kinds of reversed and worrying plots.

At the children's birthday party, relatives get together, and of course, aunts also come. At the sight of our family of three, my sister-in-law smiled and rushed to hug her son: "You see how beautiful this child is. He has big eyes like his mother and a tall nose like his father. It really combines your advantages. Great! " Sister-in-law teased the child to herself, and her husband still smirked politely. I said to my sister-in-law with my son in my arms, thank you for coming. Let's go to eat and drink later. After that, I left with my son in my arms.

At the banquet, my sister-in-law took the initiative to pull her husband to drink. Her husband toasted first, then filled it. Sister-in-law smiled and praised her husband's sincerity and honesty, saying that I have a good eye for candidates, and then pulled her husband aside and whispered. I looked at their faces and recalled a series of abnormal behaviors of my sister-in-law today, which is definitely not a good thing.

Going home for dinner at night, my dad suddenly said to her husband:

Kay, is there anything you can do with your sister-in-law's family in your construction project? My sister-in-law can invest money, and you can earn some money with her son. My husband smiled and said, Dad, I know. My sister-in-law told me today that I am also a shareholder in a small business, and I have no right to decide. I will ask you tomorrow and give you an answer. This made me furious. At the wedding, we were criticized as worthless, and now we want to make money. My sister-in-law's face is getting a little fast!

With the help of her husband, her sister-in-law invested 300,000 yuan in this project, and her son Xiao Ning also worked with her husband. Gradually, I found that my husband had changed and was often out at night. I used to send money to me as soon as I sent it. I haven't given money for a long time now, and the money for the baby's milk powder is still given by my in-laws. I always feel a little strange.

Three months later, a major accident occurred at the construction site, and several shareholders each paid 500 thousand as compensation, so her sister-in-law's son naturally had to pay compensation. Because of this, my sister-in-law went to my parents' house and said that her husband was a bad influence on her son, drinking and gambling all day and fooling around. It was at this time that the contradiction between my husband and I began to escalate. Later, my mother-in-law joined in and put the blame on me, saying that my sister-in-law's son had a bad influence on my husband, that he was a jinx, and that something had happened to her husband's project.

After more than a year of trouble, my husband never came home. Later, he came to ask for debts, and I realized that he lost a lot in gambling and owed a lot of debts. Later, I applied for legal aid and left my noisy home with my son clean.

If what I saw when I got married was the contempt of my sister-in-law, I can really see more things now that I am divorced.

02 with huge debts, six parents deny it.

Just after I left, I took my son out of the house cleanly and had to start all over again. I want to stay with my children and earn money to support my family. After thinking about it, I chose the financial industry with relatively flexible working hours and flexible income. Parents are responsible for picking up the children. Go out to run customers during the day, let the children study at night, and take them to the company when they work overtime.

To tell the truth, single-parent divorce has hit me hard. The person who once vowed to choose was only three years old and slapped himself. I am reluctant, but I have never regretted it because of my children. For the sake of my children and parents, I decided to start all over again.

I have worked hard for five years and have a deposit of 500,000 to 600,000. My child has entered the third grade of primary school. I plan to find a small project to start my own business, so that I can spend more time with my children.

At that time, my friend and leader Xiao Na told me that her friend didn't have enough money for a project and was looking for a partner. Xiao Na and I have been friends for ten years. She knows my family very well and belongs to a circle of friends. It was she who brought me into this industry when I was in trouble. I am very grateful to her.

Xiao Na told me about this project in detail, but I knew it was an industry I didn't understand. If I join in, I won't make this money. But out of trust in Xiao Na and her willingness to write an IOU as a guarantee, I promised to lend her 500,000 yuan, and promised to pay back the principal and interest of 600,000 yuan together one year later. But this is the beginning of my nightmare.

When the son grew up, his parents said to buy a bigger house so that the child could have his own room. They sold their old house, and their savings are 300 thousand short.

I don't want to empty my parents' hard-earned money for a lifetime, so I asked Xiao Na to return the 500,000 principal to me without interest. She always promised, but kept looking for various reasons to shirk the time, which made me feel uneasy, but I was not too strong because of my friendship and the face of the leader.

After consulting with my parents, I took out a loan of 500,000 yuan, thinking that my parents could save some money for use, and I would pay it back when Xiao Na paid it back on schedule.

Then the epidemic came and I lost my job. I'd rather ask Xiao Na to pay back the money, but she has been avoiding it.

I found her house with the idea of war. I didn't know that her house had been surrounded by a dozen people. They all came for money. They are all classmates and friends who have been playing since childhood. I have no idea at all.

Some of them have IOUs, others don't, and the amount ranges from tens of thousands to hundreds of thousands. There is also a high school classmate, the amount is close to one million. This incident caused an uproar. Capable people will follow her every day to force her to pay back the money, and honest people can only take legal channels. I also went through legal channels, but she doesn't have any executable assets in her name, even the house is rented, and there is a mother with serious mental illness at home, so I can only admit that I am unlucky.

During that time, I was completely devastated. I was cheated of my hard-earned money. My parents bought a house and decorated a new home. And a loan of 500 thousand. More importantly, I am almost forty years old and unemployed. Without a source of income, how can I repay this 500,000 yuan, and the expenses of the children are not small.

I have been afraid to tell my parents about this, just to comfort them. Because of the epidemic, the bill will be slower, but I will definitely come back.

The monthly expenses are in front of me. I don't want to worry the old people, and my job has not been settled for a long time. So I started the revolving loan model, and I made a circle of loans, large and small. The debt has also changed from 500,000 mortgage to nearly 6.5438+0 million, and the monthly repayment is more than 20,000.

Although I found a job later, my income and expenditure were completely out of proportion. I'm getting more and more stressed and depressed.

My parents found that I was in a wrong state and began to force me to ask about me. I didn't tell the truth, which made the two old people dumbfounded.

Dad is almost 70 years old, and mom is 66. This 654.38+0 million is an astronomical figure for them now. My parents turned pale one night and looked at their anxious and haggard faces. I really want to kill myself. I knelt in front of my parents, slapped myself in the face and cried hysterically. Dad didn't say anything, but touched my head. My mother cried with me and repeatedly said, Don't be too sad. The children need you, and we don't need you.

Three days later, my mother said to me, I have an arrangement with your father. I'll borrow some from your cousin, and your father will go to your sister-in-law and them. First, we will collect 500,000 yuan to repay all your online loans. We will pay the mortgage slowly. If not, we'll sell the house, and the money will always be enough for you to pay back. I refused my mother: this house can't be sold, it's your hard-earned money all your life, this is our home, you are here to support the elderly, you can't sell it! Mom said: Don't worry, it won't be sold. These relatives at home are very good and will not save you. Your father and I are still old!

My parents are very kind and honest people. They have been thinking of others all their lives, and would rather suffer than treat others badly all their lives. They believe that people are kind. But this time, they were dragged down by me!

For several days in a row, my parents went out early and returned late. Every time I come back, I am silent. Looking at their graying hair, I know I have made them suffer.

It seems that it is agreed that each family will pay 20 thousand yuan, saying that there is no need to pay back the money, but no one wants to borrow it. Even if their parents told them to sell the house and pay back the money, no one would believe them.

Half a month passed, and my parents gave me 300,000 yuan, including 6,543,800 yuan from my relatives and 200,000 yuan from three friends.

When my father transferred the money to me, he said:

Xiao Gan, my parents are old and useless. We have been helping people all our lives, but people still have to rely on themselves! I know what my father means. My parents are old now and have no ability to repay. I am single and have no stable job. Of course, others don't want to borrow it.

I would rather give 20,000 as a personal favor than take 65,438+10,000 at risk. This is human nature, I understand, but it is limited to understanding and unacceptable.

From then on, no one in the family will take the initiative to call my parents. Even if someone has a banquet, they will try not to inform us. In my aunt's words, "I knew your family was in trouble and I was afraid you would spend money, so I didn't call you." My parents have never borrowed money from anyone in their lives and have been living a hard life. First, because I got married, then divorced, and now I borrow money, they are uncomfortable and naturally embarrassed to go.

Parents' monthly retirement salary, in addition to arranging children's expenses, will help me repay. Every time they use a passbook to withdraw money from the bank, my heart is like a knife.

03 "poor friends" who never leave.

Xiao Na and I have been friends for ten years. I met her at a girlfriends' party, so after the accident, all our friends knew about it. Of course, two of them were cheated by her, but with little money, they were bankrupt. When they learned about my situation, they all felt wronged for me and tried to help me.

My best friend directly suggested that she has a quota of 200,000, and she can lend it to me at any time if I need it. I have suffered from the loss of the online loan pit myself, so I dare to pit her again. What's more, my income is unstable now, I don't know when I can pay it back, and I can't cheat her.

I used to go out to eat and sing with them every week. Most of them took the initiative to pay the bill, thinking that everyone would be happy. Now I am under great economic pressure and mental pressure, and I don't want to see anyone at all. They buy their own food and come to my house every week. One is to see my parents, and the other is to comfort me, for fear that the more I suppress, the more depressed I will become.

Last Mid-Autumn Festival, my best friend bought crabs and moon cakes to my house. At the dinner table, when my girlfriend toasted my parents, she said, "Uncle and aunt, you should trust Xiao Gan. She can turn over and you will enjoy happiness. " My father took a sip of wine and said with a smile: We don't want to enjoy happiness, but we just hope that she can get over this hurdle as soon as she and her children are well. My mother sighed and secretly wiped her tears.

My best friend smiled at each other and took out an envelope from her bag and handed it to me. I feel like a card when I touch it. I was about to open it when my best friend stopped me with his hand: don't look, password your birthday.

As soon as the word came out, my parents understood it. My dad grabbed it, got up and walked over to his best friend, and forced it on her: it won't work. Xiao Gan told me that it is not easy for you two, and the old people at home are also helping you. They are old and young, and we have your heart. My mother also said excitedly, Jingjing, we appreciate your kindness. If we are not here in the future, you and Xiao Gan will walk around more. She will take care of the children alone, so please take care of them. We are relieved. This money is really not available.

At some point, my mother cried and I cried. My best friend's husband helped my dad sit down and said with a smile: Don't worry, uncle, this money is compensation for my hometown factory. We kept part of it. This 1 ten thousand yuan was lent to Xiao Gan for emergency use and should be returned in full. Please keep more at hand. This family is both an old man and a child, and there are many places to spend money.

When I heard that it was 1 10,000, my parents were even more excited. I can't believe it either. I heard about this factory from my best friend before, but I never thought about it. Even if I do, there is no need to lend me so much. How can I return it? But really, if I can borrow this money, I won't have to pay so much interest every month now, and I can settle all my debts at once.

When my best friend slapped me, I was struggling what to do:

We lent you this money, and you must pay it back, but you can't pay it back with the money from the loan or the house sale. You can only pay it back with the money you earned. We will give you five years to use the money you earned to pay back the 654.38+million. Do you dare?

I gave my best friend a big hug. I understand her thoughts. She told me to cheer up. She told me that she believed I could turn over. She is telling my parents that my uncle and aunt can feel at ease with her.

My best friend hugged me and whispered in my ear: I'm sorry, the money just came down. She was weak before. I cried and shook my head and said, thank you. I don't know what else to say except thank you.

In 2004, I entered 500,000 yuan, which my father never saw again.

I took the money borrowed by my best friend, paid off all my debts, and paid back 200 thousand borrowed by my parents from my friends to reassure the elderly. As for the 20,000 relatives, I have my own plans.

Without the pressure of repayment, I began to concentrate on finding a job, but I am almost forty and have no good work experience. I have to take care of the children, I can't travel for a long time, I can't work overtime for a long time, which makes me hit a wall everywhere. One day, my girlfriend suddenly sent me a link. I ordered it. It's about starting a business from the media. My best friend sent me a message: Learn the media, just write from an early age, and don't waste it. I can't pay back my salary for a lifetime.

What she said really woke me up. I am working in this situation, even if I have a unit, I can't save much money, let alone pay back the money. In the next few days, I carefully collected a lot of content about entrepreneurship from the media and watched many courses. In addition, I also came up with the idea of learning from the media during the day and setting up a stall to fry strings at night, so that I can earn my living by frying strings at the beginning when I am not familiar with the media. As long as you find a good position, you can earn one or twenty thousand yuan a month.

Do it. I asked my friend to help me inquire about the purchase and production process. My father and I looked for more places everywhere and booked a dining car.

Half a month later, my night market fried string spread out. At the same time, I have been studying since the media writing course. Slowly, one piece of work took shape and was released. I made my first money from the media and my confidence doubled.

Just when everything was improving, my father suddenly fell ill. He had already retired and went out to work a year ago because of me. He runs for a long time, leaving early and returning late every day, and his body is overwhelmed. It turned out that his father had a chronic liver disease and had a serious illness.

After my father was ill, my mother and I took turns to take care of him. Go to the hospital to take care of my father during the day. In the evening, my mother helps me prepare something for the stall. In the evening, my mother took care of my father in the hospital, and I took my children to set up a stall. Sometimes I am really busy, so I put my children at my best friend's house, and my best friend's house follows me.

Knowing that Dad was in hospital, relatives at home also came to see him. Everyone prepared a red envelope of 10000, but my mother and I confiscated it. They don't know what I'm doing now or what my best friend is doing for me.

Everyone looked at me with contempt, and then told me that my dad had worked hard all his life, so let me be a good person and stop worrying about him. I nodded deadpan. I know in my heart that mom and dad have been dragged down by me. I am sorry for my parents. I don't need them to remind me

Three months later, my dad still left. I knelt in front of my dad's bed and kept kowtowing and saying I was sorry. But for me, he wouldn't have left so early. My mother cried and hugged me. She told me to be strong. As long as I have a good life with my children, my father's contribution is worthwhile, and I can feel at ease when I leave. Although my mother is honest and kind by nature, she told me to send my father away with dignity and not to let my relatives point fingers. I nodded hard.

In front of the mourning hall, relatives and friends came to burn incense. I thought I could send my father away gracefully and quietly. A conversation between two aunts and their father's friends completely angered me. "My third brother is too honest. For his family, he spoiled Xiao Gan all his life. He must pay off his children's debts when he is old. He was exhausted. It's really pitiful. "

I'm not angry at all just hearing this. Yes, I dragged my father down, but the next words made me take the initiative.

My eldest sister-in-law took a look at my mother and said, "My third sister-in-law is also very lucky. I found my third brother, and I don't worry all my life. My family depends on my brother to support me ... "Before she finished, I blew up. I knelt down and kowtowed to my dad for three times, then got up and shouted, All those who come to see our jokes and make irresponsible remarks get out of here! As soon as this was said, the whole room quieted down and my aunt's face turned green. My mother quickly stopped me and asked me to send my father away.

I patted my mother with a smile, turned my head and continued: everyone should know about me, and our family has not become the object of your sneaking around, but I tell you that I am sorry for my parents, sorry for you, sorry for my parents. You are not qualified to make irresponsible remarks in my house, let alone watch jokes in my father's mourning hall. You really came to see my dad off. I sincerely thank you. If you're here to make irresponsible remarks, you can get out!

After that, my best friend rushed in and gave me a handbag. I smiled and gave her a hug and said thank you. I called my handbag and took out five stacks of money, each stack of 50 thousand. I asked my girlfriend to help me get cash from the bank.

I gave the money to several relatives who borrowed money at the beginning and paid it back one by one: last year, my father begged my grandfather to tell my grandmother to help me, and each of you said that you didn't have to pay back 20 thousand, and then you never talked to my family again. I'll pay you back 50 thousand alone today From now on, we will never see each other again!

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First of all, I want to show my attitude: I don't blame my relatives for not helping me at that time. After all, no one's money is blown by the wind, it is hard-earned money. Moreover, it is human nature that I dare not lend money to help me when I have huge debts, unknown sources of income or even no income. Nobody wants to waste their hard-earned money. I understand this very well.

I am angry that, as a blood relative of my parents, whether I can pay for help or not, at least I shouldn't gossip behind my back, go in and watch jokes and be cynical until my dad leaves. I can't accept it when you tell me that my mother is involved.

Secondly, I want to say that no matter how wronged you are now and what kind of debts and pressures you are burdened with, you must never give up. Don't expect anyone to understand and help you. First of all, you should take action to help yourself and stand on your own feet, so that you can see hope, your family can see hope, and your noble people will appear. If you do nothing and give up on yourself, then you really have nothing.

Back to the question: what kind of person will a person become after the most difficult and helpless days?

Looking back on this decade, although it is not vigorous, it is also a woman who has grown and changed in the constant tempering of life. In the past ten years, I have changed from a simple girl with infinite illusions about marriage to a middle-aged woman who is constantly promoted by her family. I have hated and resented, but I have never regretted it. Because of these ten years, I can become so powerful now. To say regret, I want to say to my parents: Mom and Dad, I will be your child in the next life, and I will be good to you!

Tell me again what I've become.

1. I am only responsible for the person who gave birth to me and the person who gave birth to me. If you respect me, I will pay you back some points.

If you are good to me, I will cherish you for a lifetime; Let people with agendas in. I don't have time and mood for entertainment, because I don't have enough time to love someone who deserves my love.

Don't expect anyone but your parents to pull you out of the abyss, and don't blame anyone for not wanting to help you.

You know, avoiding disasters is human instinct, and giving charcoal in the snow is human kindness. Cherish the cover-up of your mutual affection, and remember to be doubly grateful, whether it is family or friendship, it is worthy of gratitude.

Actions speak louder than words.

Whether you study hard or work hard, you must find a skill to make a living by yourself. Only you can save yourself from the trouble. People's ability is seen in action, and people's potential is excavated in difficulties. Nobody helps you because others can't see your value. The more difficult it is, the more you bury yourself in your own way. When you are hardworking and kind, you will bring hope to yourself and your family, and the light on your body will certainly attract people who help you out of trouble.

Don't believe that the pie will hit you at any time.

Don't be greedy, don't worry, don't believe that someone can take you "rich" and earn money that you can understand and grasp, and don't be tempted to talk nonsense.

Don't be too soft-hearted, too kind and too generous. A liar starts with people around him.

Be kind to the world, but never take it lightly. Help those who deserve your help and guard against those you should guard against. When you really can't tell the good from the bad, just be conservative and let the right one in!

Now I write, set up a stall and concentrate on making money. My love is only for my mother and children who accompany me through the abyss, and my affection is only for my close friends who accompany me all the way. Three meals and four seasons, the sun and the moon change, it is good to have a loving and righteous family!

I can do it, and I'm sure you can, too. Come on!