What humorous and profound self-deprecating sentences are there?

1, personal introduction: poor, cheap, unable to move.

I have to choose one to make a fortune and a circle of friends.

3. People have backgrounds, so do I..

My life can be summed up in nine words: I want to do whatever I want with my salary, and the salary is naturally cool.

In the poker game of life, God deals cards and we play cards ourselves.

I used to be poor, but I was happy. It's different now, not only poor, but also unhappy.

7. I am like a fly lying on the glass. I have a bright future, but I can't find a way out

8. It suddenly occurred to me that all my future plans have the same beginning: when I get rich.