I always quarrel with my mother. My mother likes to say some hurtful things to me. What should I do if it hurts me?

In fact, in psychology, there is a related knowledge called the family of origin. Psychology once mentioned some behavioral patterns of children, which are more of an extension of the interaction pattern between parents and them, such as when a child When he was very young, he had no idea what it meant to be a good person, or some social codes of conduct. These required interaction and communication with his parents, so that he could better know how to deal with relationships between people.

And you mentioned that your mother likes to say things that hurt you and frustrate your self-esteem. In fact, you can think about it from another perspective. When your mother was a little girl, her parents may have treated her in this way. Even if there is a sentence that is particularly popular: an unfortunate childhood, use a lifetime to heal childhood; a lucky childhood, use Childhood heals a lifetime.

In fact, if you discover the relationship between your mother and grandma, you will find that the reasons for this pattern are excusable. And you also mentioned that your mother wanted to go to your room, but you resisted, so you went to live in another room.

In fact, this kind of behavior can already make me feel that you are an independent, thoughtful, and thoughtful child. This is worthy of encouragement and affirmation, but for your mother, he expresses love. Is the method more obscure? Does your mother rarely express her love to you? Even if she does, does she communicate with you in a rude and savage way?

I can feel from your description that you are a child with strong self-awareness. In fact, if you think about your parents' behavior in one way, you will find that they just don't know how to express their inner love. In my opinion, their way of expressing love is too brutal and rude, which makes you feel uncomfortable.

You can try to describe yourself to your parents more, saying that you have grown up and need a certain amount of personal space, or you can also try to actively express your love for your parents. For example, buy a bouquet of flowers, or make breakfast for mom and dad.