Short and funny jokes

Short and funny jokes

Short and funny jokes, more and more jokes appear in our lives now. Although some jokes are short, they can help us face the problems in life. troubles. Below is some information about short and funny jokes that I have compiled for you. Let’s take a look! Short and funny joke 1

1. Making money is a kind of ability, spending money is a kind of skill. My ability is limited, but my skill is very high.

2. Life will make you suffer for a while, and after you adapt, it will make you suffer for the rest of your life.

3. If a girl today was walking on the streets in ancient times and was taken back to bed by the emperor, and washed her face at night, would she be found guilty of deceiving the emperor or something like that?

4. Nine out of ten things in life are unsatisfactory, and the remaining one or two are particularly unsatisfactory.

5. The life of a good-looking person may be a biography, a novel, or an essay. And you can only be a joke.

6. People who love to laugh will not have bad luck, but I just want to know how a person can laugh if he has always been very unlucky.

7. There is an unsolved mystery in the world called: When you are serious about losing weight, you will never stop eating.

8. Who said "If you keep thinking about me, there will be repercussions"? The person I like has never talked to me, and I have never realized how to get rich overnight.

9. When a man really falls in love with you, you will find that he has an extra father. When a man pretends to fall in love with you, you will find that he has an extra son, but he is still a rebellious son. .

10. I think back then, I had a small waist, but now, I sigh with a lot of fat.

11. Which is more important, the wife or the game? Of course, my wife is more important, so I only dare to play games, not my wife.

12. You can’t hide something you like to eat. Even if you cover your mouth, saliva will still overflow from your fingers. Short and funny jokes 2

1. When I was in high school, the president of the student union was attracted by a girl who studied physical education. I don’t know which Korean idol drama this girl studied. One word is Mabi Dong Chairman, and one word is Ma Bi Dong Chairman. Si Er's big foot kicked the chairman in the face. The chairman was so big that he burst into tears. The next day, this girl was given a warning for beating a classmate!

2. Yesterday, a girl suddenly said to me: "I'm pregnant." I was shocked and asked: "Whose?" The girl replied: "This time I just I met you, who do you think this child is?" Then I was completely frightened. Could video chat also cause pregnancy?

3. I was reading in the study when my girlfriend walked in wearing newly bought lace underwear, looking sexy and charming. She said to me in a sweet voice: "Honey, do you want it?" I said excitedly: "I want it! Take it off quickly and I will try it on!"

4. Japanese boys Most of them have inherited the rigid and serious character of their ancestors. Compared with girls, they may be more carefree at ordinary times, but in fact they will be hesitant when it comes to expressing their feelings.

5. Go to a friend’s house and see him repairing his son. It turned out that his son had sold a pair of iron balls that his grandfather usually played with as scrap. My arrival had already relieved the atmosphere, but unexpectedly, this boy ran to the kitchen, took out two eggs and handed them to his dad: Dad, let grandpa play with this first... I have to leave first, I guess it's time. No one can stop it.

6. Today a friend sent me a question: What are the three things you lose most often. A friend of mine retweeted that post and it said: face, parents’ face, teacher’s face. In an instant we all knelt down.

(To be honest)

7. My mother was taking a nap in the living room. I was afraid that she would catch a cold, so I shook her awake. As a result, my mother was confused and grabbed my arm. He stopped and asked me nervously: "Is your wife giving birth to a boy or a girl?!" I was stunned for a while and said, "Mom, I am a girl!"

8. The weather was too bad last night. It was hot. I woke up in the middle of the night and sat on the bed, and then I involuntarily let out a very loud and long fart. After about ten seconds, my roommate in the next bed also sat up with a loud sound, and we looked at each other. Two minutes later, he said, "The weather is hot and smelly!" I didn't dare to tell him the truth.

9. When I was in college, blogs were popular. One of my roommates was obsessed with them. By chance, he discovered that he could swipe visitors and mysteriously told me about the opportunity to make a fortune. Here, when the number of visitors reaches a certain level, you can become a celebrity, and people can spend money on advertising. In short, there are many benefits, so this guy went to the Internet cafe to buy two machines, stopped attending classes, and visited visitors day and night. Later, he was finally banned.

10. I have a friend whose father has never cared much about him. Even during the college entrance examination, he didn’t feel how good his children’s grades were. When filling out his application form, he secretly changed my friend’s application to blue. Xiang..., and then my friend got into Lanxiang with 670 points... It is said that the school was packed with people on the day of registration... The welcoming scene was lively... Short and funny jokes 3

1. The kidnapper asked me to go to school tomorrow morning I went to the train station at eight o'clock to pick up the money, so I arrived at six-thirty the next day.

2. Someone confesses to me, how should I reject him in order to minimize the harm? God’s reply: Just ask your children for their opinions before you go home.

3. Customers often say: "I'll go back and think about it, and I'll come back to you when I'm sure." After they finished speaking, I understood a truth: some people, once they turn around, they will be there for the rest of their lives.

4. We are still young, so we should not fall in love, because we are raising other people’s wives, which is not worth it!

5. What is long-distance relationship? God’s reply: A long-distance relationship is like having an electronic pet in your phone.

6. Wear other people's shoes and walk other people's paths, so that others can neither find their shoes nor their way.

7. A fat man is destined to die, which may be heavier than Mount Tai or heavier than other mountains.

8. When a friend got married, the host invited me to the stage and said: "Today is the wedding day of your good brother. Can you come up and say something?" I was a little excited: "Then order some candy. Let’s have vinegar carp and braised pork ribs.”

9. When I was in my third year of high school, I went to the bank to apply for a card. The counter gave me a form. The type of ID I filled in was: rectangular.

10. Question: "What is the English word for poodle?" Answer: "VIP dog"

11. "Do you like Sleeping Beauty?" "I like it, but I haven't slept with it."

12. A friend asked, don't you think about leaving your current job every three or four months? I worked? Every three or four months I want to leave this world.