How to make children say goodbye to procrastination and bad habits and do a good job in time management?

Parents often complain that their children have no concept of time and do not know how to grasp time. Then, we will carefully consider how to have a sense of time. Do we have our own? As far as I know, some people sometimes.

Time management is indeed in place, but there are also many people who have a vague concept of time. You may not agree with this statement, so ask yourself: What was the arrangement for the whole day yesterday? Is there a clear plan? These arrangements are

Is it reasonable? How long did everything take? How accurate is your schedule?

If we are not good at managing time ourselves, we can only teach our children in an empty way, so "hurry up" becomes the most correct nonsense. Children are often confused about how to "grasp"? Even those who are good at managing time, how to teach their own methods to children is a small problem.

Look up the concept of "time concept" and divide it into natural time, humanistic time and psychological time according to the trichotomy. The core of humanistic time is historical time, which has little to do with our discussion and is omitted here.

Yes. The core of natural time is clock time, which is objective; The core of psychological time is experience time, which is subjective. Natural time and psychological time do not always coincide, as Einstein's famous joke shows.

This point: if you sit next to a beautiful girl for an hour, you only feel that you have been sitting for a while; On the contrary, if you sit on a hot stove, it will be like an hour for a while. The same is true for children: if children watch it,

You can't have too many favorite cartoons for two hours; If he is asked to do homework that he doesn't like, half an hour will pass like a year.

I believe many people have experienced the conflict between natural time and psychological time. Recalling my primary school and junior high school, the conflict between them is so fierce-class time is like a snail; Time flies so fast when you are distracted.

Like lightning. Return to absolute being, always regret. At that time, I was confused and distressed, but I couldn't explain this contradiction. Now I finally understand that our psychological time is like a free and rambling child, following our feelings.

At the moment of love, happiness and pleasure, it flies; The moment of rejection, depression and trouble is as long as death.

In this way, what we call cultivating the concept of time and teaching children to learn time management includes at least two aspects, namely, cultivating the feeling of natural time and psychological time. On how to cultivate, let me talk about my thoughts and feelings.

First, change the psychological time.

Usually, when people are doing what they like, their psychological time passes the fastest and their inner feelings are the most pleasant. Biographies often have such a plot: many talented people like to play, but they have reached the average.

A height that people can't reach. We envy these people, not only enjoying the process, but also harvesting the results. Why can they have both? In addition to talent and diligence, interest is also a factor that cannot be ignored. one person

When doing what you like, the inner resistance is the smallest, even close to zero. At this time, psychological time is naturally fast. What seems difficult to us is a piece of cake to them. The child is also one.

For example, if you are interested in something, you are completely immersed in it and don't realize the passage of time. This once again confirms the familiar sentence: interest is the best teacher! This is exactly what all educators and psychologists do.

Economists attach great importance to the reasons for cultivating interest. Interest is not only related to the efficiency of doing things, but most importantly, it directly affects the quality of life. We might as well imagine that if we do something we are interested in, time will pass unconsciously.

I feel full and happy inside, and this life course is naturally full of happiness. On the contrary, if forced to do disgusting things, the psychological time will be artificially lengthened, and the process of doing things will make people feel very painful. Go through such pain

This process, even if it is finally successful, is not a complete victory. Then, whether adults or children, the core way to change psychological time is to cultivate interest.

In addition, psychological expectation is also an important factor affecting psychological time. Usually, psychological expectation is contrary to the actual change of time. For example, the more children look forward to class, the slower time passes. Parents are also easy to fall into.

In this misunderstanding, the more you want to see a child's speed, the more you can always find evidence of slowness. In my last book, I wrote an article "Slow Temperament", which was devoted to this problem. The more impatient parents are, the easier it is to cultivate.

A grumpy child. In fact, it is not entirely the child's fault that he has no concept of time and does not know how to manage time. On the one hand, this is exactly what children need to learn; On the other hand, it is often the psychological state of adults that interferes.

Kid. If children want to have a reasonable concept of time, both sides should lower their psychological expectations and not be too impatient. The faster we hope, the slower our psychological time will be. This is the truth of "haste makes waste". In addition, psychological expectations

Menstruation will interfere with our normal judgment. Some parents wrote to me, saying that their children were slow to do things and asked what to do. I asked how slow it was, and the parents didn't describe it specifically, so I asked parents to record their children's daily work completely.

Time spent by companies. Seeing the record, many parents suddenly realized that their children were not slow, but too impatient, and unconsciously measured their children with the speed of adults. It can be seen that most of them have no concept of time.

Children who read are "created" by adults' inappropriate concept of time.

Emotion also plays an important role in psychological time. Children always try to divert their attention from things they don't like. At this time, we will feel that the child is "absent-minded" and "inattentive". In fact, children

I just don't want to focus on the present. Faced with this situation, parents are most likely to feel depressed and scold their children. Parents will have some effect in a short time by preaching, blaming, beating and cursing, threatening and other means.

Fruit, on the contrary, destroys the child's psychological time, increases the psychological resistance, and only pushes it slower and slower, and falls into a vicious circle of negative emotions. Some children's psychological time is already very slow, for example, as soon as they are asked to do their homework, they will pass like this.

In 2008, at this time, if we continue to use the method of scolding, it will only continue to lengthen the child's psychological time. We might as well look for countermeasures and adopt a positive reinforcement method to find the subtle progress of children and affirm it in time. this

This method may not be immediate, but it can definitely change the child's psychological time. When we meet children who don't like doing homework, we need some rules to restrain them, but the most fundamental thing is to find the fun of learning.

Fun, enhance children's sense of accomplishment and pleasure.

Second, we should be aware of natural time.

In life, it is difficult for us to maintain a high degree of enthusiasm for everything. When we are not so passionate, we need to be aware of natural time and improve the efficiency of time utilization. I started to explore this seriously.

The problem is that when I took the postgraduate entrance examination, it was also described in the book. At that time, there were 100 days before the exam, and the books to be read piled up one foot high. In extreme anxiety, I am most concerned about how to make good use of every minute. I

I thought of a very simple way, that is, write down the starting time of everything and the workload of this paragraph, such as "9: 03-9: 15, studying pedagogy, ***27 pages", and finally, all of it.

The schedule is clear at a glance. Analyze your time utilization every night, find out what you can improve, and make continuous improvement in this way, and truly realize the digital management of your time. I monitor

Out, it takes 3 minutes to read a page at first, but it only takes more than a minute later, which brings me a great sense of accomplishment. I am always in a state of excitement, racing against my own speed every day. This method has made me.

The most incredible leap in life. Now, I still record the start time and work content every day. If you don't remember for a day, you will be inefficient, confused and don't know how to waste time.

Where have you been?

Don't be too hard on children in time management. Even adults are often unaware of the time spent on daily activities. If you don't believe me, we might as well write down the time spent writing a page, cooking a meal, getting up early to wash, tidying up the closet and other small things in life. If we can't write it, we might as well estimate it and check it again, and we will find that our feelings may not be accurate.

I often advise parents to help their children record quietly in this way. After a week of continuous recording, you will find many problems. For example, children will overestimate their speed or underestimate the difficulty of homework.

Degree, or because writing and playing delayed a lot of time. This observation will also correct our judgment. Many problems of children are not due to bad attitude, but to lack of ability. On this basis, children can be reminded as early as possible.

Starting at 8: 00, leaving more time for questions, this record can give a specific number, about how long it is ahead of schedule. In addition, you can monitor your child's individual efficiency. For example, it usually takes more time to do one page of exercises.

Less time, the fastest time. In this way, children can slowly master their own speed, and then, we can slowly pass on this time management method to children, so that children can record and analyze themselves, and that's all.

You can gradually form the habit of being efficient. Of course, we hope to help children in this way, not to criticize them. Therefore, we should allow children to be fast and slow, because we are the same. Never put this on.

As a means of supervision, if children are required to meet the highest standards, they can always find shortcomings. In that case, the children will certainly suffer.

Third, rest before you are tired.

Some children like to do their homework for two or three hours without rest. This seems to be very focused, and it will be very fulfilling to finish it in one breath. However, from the perspective of brain health, I don't agree with this method.

We all have this experience. At first, it was very efficient, and gradually, we felt tired. We just force ourselves to cheer up. This state of hard support will definitely reduce efficiency, and

Moreover, this will artificially lengthen the psychological time. During the postgraduate entrance examination, I kept the rhythm of studying for 25 minutes and resting for 5 minutes. Such frequent rest seems troublesome, but it is very efficient. Because of the short study time,

I can maintain a high degree of concentration, rest before I am tired, and keep my heart high. For children, I generally recommend a 30-minute study break of 10 minutes. If we keep this rhythm, the children will not have it.

I feel very tired. What the ancients called "a way to relax and be civil and military" is very reasonable.

A rhythmic rest will make children feel hopeful. For example, by 27 minutes, the child may be very tired, but when he thinks that there are still 3 minutes left, he can motivate himself and stick to it. If the child thinks it hasn't been an hour

The opportunity to rest, then, he will take the initiative to delay, in the process of doing things, quietly give himself a "holiday" in a distracted and lazy way. Time seems to be very important. The longer the time, the greater the psychological pressure.

When a child's endurance, in terms of speech and body movements, will change, such as talking to himself, scratching his head, being absent-minded and depressed. When some parents use this method, it will be effective at first.

The rate is further reduced: the child continues to be lazy during the 30-minute homework time, but is determined not to let go of the remaining 10 minutes. A mother was very anxious about this situation and asked me what to do. I advised her to continue.

Insist that if the child is lazy and hasn't changed for a while, simply remind him, such as tapping the table gently or silently taking away the toys in the child's hand, don't say much or criticize. If the child behaves well,

Then make sure in time. After a period of time, the child's efficiency began to improve greatly within 30 minutes. The child's parents were very surprised, and the problems that had not been solved before were so tense that they disappeared quietly. There is a simple reason.

Single, if we take the initiative to meet children's rest needs, they don't need to secretly give themselves a "holiday". In this way, it is very unwise to force children to "turn around" because they are not careful in their homework.

It will only make the problem worse.

Some children like to take a break for a few minutes in the middle of homework. Most parents will interpret it as impetuous and just want to play. In my opinion, impetuousness is only one of the possibilities, and it may be that children want to prove it.

Time spent on tasks. Therefore, I always advise parents that if the frequency of children's questions is not very high (for example, once every 2 minutes), tell them that no matter what the purpose of their questions is, they will get a result: children.

My son's sense of natural time is getting more and more accurate! Isn't that what we want?