Classic funny sayings

1. I admit that I am fat, but at least I am more attractive when I am fat.

2. It’s raining again. I miss you so much. I remember walking with you in the rain. The rain wet your hair and you looked as ugly as a ghost.

3. Sometimes, I miss you day and night. But when the person you miss appears in front of you, you remain calm.

4. Don’t live in other people’s mouths, don’t live in other people’s eyes, but hold your destiny in your own hands.

5. Become famous just to crush those who looked down on you at the beginning.

6. This feeling of having nothing to do is worse than being poor.

7. The Buddha said that a person's life is between breathing. I felt secretly ashamed when I heard it, because my life is still entangled in QQ.

8. Some people say I am handsome and I laugh, but they say I am even more handsome when I smile.

9. If men and women are not close to each other, how can China have a population of 1.3 billion.

10. Even if you want to cry, smile and say: Your uncle!

11. There are sunny days and rainy days on the road of life. Friends are like an umbrella. They will be by your side no matter whether it is sunny or rainy.

12. When I have a crush on someone, I always feel that that person will like me.

13. Every tear is love, and every drop is condensed into sadness.

14. It’s not that I look down on you, I’ve never seen you at all.

15. Don’t complain if there is no beef in the beef noodles. There is no wife in the wife cake either.

16. Even if he has all kinds of faults and all kinds of disappointments, he is still the person I love.

17. I have an unknown poem. No one knows him all over the world. Only idiots and I know. A fool is reading this poem.

18. Girl, please look in the mirror. What looks good when mixed and matched is the clothes, not the facial features.

19. Stupidity is contagious, don’t get close to me, I’m smart.

20 Waiting is so difficult, but hurting is so easy.

21. I can’t find you on Baidu, so I’ll look for you on Sogou.

22. A woman can be a princess by relying on her parents, a princess by relying on a man, and a queen by herself.

23. When I’m drunk, I won’t obey anyone, so I’ll hold on to the wall.

24. It is reasonable for men to look at women, and it is natural for women to look at men. If men do not look at women, the word love is written upside down. If women do not look at men, the world is over!

25. Even if someone calls me crazy, I will raise my head and say to him with contempt, "Are you from the same hospital as me?

26. There are always regrets in life. , why insist on those who don’t belong to us?

27. It’s better to make more money than me, and it will be easier if you don’t need me to support you.

28. When someone pushes you down, no matter how hard it is or how tired you are, you have to stand up and give her a slap in the face.

29. Wang Xiaojian teaches you to curse without being dirty. If you don’t look at you, you will be out. .

30. I want to live every day with a smile, but the flesh on my face is too heavy, so I can only stop smiling.

31. If you love, please love deeply, and never give up. , please be thorough; ambiguity will hurt others and yourself.

32. Don’t compare yourself to me. I am too lazy to compare with you. I am lazy and proud.

33. People are iron. Food is like steel. If you don’t eat for a day, you will feel hungry.

34. I wore a pair of very beautiful underwear for the injection. The nurse will feel better after seeing it.

35. Happiness is so hard to come by, why is it so easy to leave?

36. People have to grow up. Growing up is like traveling, and the scenery is always new.

37. , Before I met you, I didn’t know how to love. After I missed you, I lost my love.

38. During the exam, I wanted to turn the pot over, but my grandma didn’t expect it to stick to the pot.

39. Brother, is the fan in your head broken?

40. There was a Gongsuo Agarwood before, and now there is a Gongsuo Liancheng. It is estimated that there will be a Gongsuo gate soon.

41. I can give up on you, but I can’t forget you.

42. Please come and watch me. I am the best at being approachable.

43. After breaking up, I don’t ask for anything. I just hope that every woman you have in the future will be worse than the other.

44. Why do you laugh it off every time, but you really have such a good time chatting with her!

45. That little longing. I can’t erase it, I just want to keep it in my heart quietly.

46. Eat appropriately to lose weight effectively.

47. You are not my contact lens, why should I take you seriously?

48. If you like me, I follow the righteous path of Marxism. Do you know what to do?

49. I really want to find you and hold you tight! Tell you I miss you so much!

50. If I like you, I don’t need any reason; if I don’t like you, everything is a reason.

51. If you leave, you still have to leave. What remains is just a body. If you stay, you still have to stay. My heart will take root again.

52. Your Majesty, I have something to ask for. Please send me to the cold palace. I can’t bear it any longer. The weather is too damn hot.

53. Let’s talk about it when we have something to do. Don’t always say I’m cute behind my back. Does it bother you?

54. Who is my future girlfriend dating now?

55. Don’t dig my grave. Remember back then, I was also a tomb robber.

56. Wherever it exists, it blooms. Don't forget to spread fragrance just because you are sad.

57. You are like a child and you still talk about taking care of others.

58. The meaning of life is to eat. If you don’t eat, you would be really sorry for yourself!

59. Once upon a time, you were the flowers of the motherland, growing vigorously. Now, you are the red apricots of the motherland, collectively climbing over the wall.

60. Sometimes, when talking to strangers about the past, I shed tears. Is it sad?

61. When many people reorganize their prejudices, they think they are thinking.

62. Being in a daze, if done well, is called deepness. If you don't do it well, you're more likely to fall asleep.

63. Don’t worry about the vague future, just work hard for the clear present.

64. The result of taking the essence and discarding the dross is pregnancy.

65. Don’t think a girl is naive. If she doesn’t like you, she will be more mature than your mother every minute.

66. Suddenly looking back, I was in a dimly lit place.

67. No matter how awesome you are, why can’t Baidu search for you?

68. Drink some water. The Nongfu Spring is full of crickets. Eat some meat. Bajie is more expensive than Tang Seng.

69. Appearance determines fate. No wonder my fate is so bumpy.

70. Ten years of life and death are blurred, without thinking and unforgettable. Without wearing long trousers, there is no place to express desolation.

71. If two people are together for a long time, staring at each other is the most romantic thing.

72. No one looks down on you, because no one looks down on you at all, everyone is very busy.

73. I only get called handsome every time when I’m buying clothes. It’s such a painful realization.

74. Those who leave most quickly are always the most beautiful scenery; those who are hurt the most are always the most true feelings.

75. The new one is not necessarily the best, the old one may still work better.

76. Our love is like a tractor on the road, vigorous and vigorous.

77. Tencent, can you remind me when someone deletes me, so that I won’t be too sentimental?

78. Are you blind? You can't see such a big shield, but you want to throw the stone at my head.

79. When I get angry, I want to buy something. When I buy something, I have to spend money. When I spend money, I get less money. When I get less money, I get angry!

80. There are a few plum blossoms in the corner, tell me who you love. If you don't tell me, it's your deskmate.

81. Without music, life is a pity; without love, life is a waste.

82. The mountain alliance vows to die in Hudong, and there will be sorrow all the way.

83. Who will love you like a wild horse and give you grassland and distance.

84. People who are easily angry have low emotional intelligence and are the targets of villains.

85. Let go of my hand and say we will spend the rest of our lives apart.

86. Men like the whole country because they feel that only the whole country can make their women's hearts beat.

87. Just wait, one day you will be my son’s mother!

88. My biggest dream is to become a snail and have a house of my own as soon as I am born.

89. I don’t know why I feel so angry when I see her putting on makeup.

90. Even gases are inert, so why can’t people be lazy?

91. Forgive me for my duplicity, you don’t understand. Forgive me for being too indulgent and unable to keep you.

92. Sometimes your anger does not mean that you care, but also distrust.

93. My parents wouldn’t let me be neither three nor four, so I chose two.

94. I have become stupid again this summer. How should I integrate into that high-IQ environment when school starts.