What are the classic basketball explanations?

Tell me about your favorite commentary, Yang Yi!

Classic segment (explaining rocket competition)

Yang Yi+Ma Zhongyang

Yang: (Artest pushes the ball inside, which is a foul) Oh, Artest's ball is really healthy.

Ma: (pretending to be serious) Artest, I want to criticize you.

Yang: Criticize what?

Ma: Artest, I want to criticize you. You are too careless about your health.

Yang: (laughs) I guess Artest knocked you down before he finished.

M: Let me put it another way.

Yang: What do you mean?

Ma: (continuing to be serious) Artest, I want to criticize you. You should pay attention to your health.

(After that, this person repeated "You are too careless about your health" several times and became a classic paragraph.)

One day, the sun faced the rocket.

Ma: Today's game is wonderful! T-Mac took the ball to attack ... Barnes fouled Alston maliciously when defending the pick and roll ... After T-Mac made a three-pointer ... Alston and Barnes settled accounts ... T-Mac pushed Barnes ... Nash also pushed Alston ... Then T-Mac pushed Nash ... Yao Ming pushed T-Mac ... O 'Neill pushed many people ... Alston ... American basketball star) ... Yao Ming ... It was all his push.

O 'Neill is the biggest winner ... Look at the team battle. ...

Opening:

Ma: Next to you, this is Yang, deputy editor-in-chief and general manager of titan sports!

Yang: Hello, Manager Ma!

Yang: It's very cheap to sign Uncle Mu.

Ma: But you can't just play cheap.

Yang: Because you are not the boss.

M: Do you remember that Mai said he was the best player in the world?

Yang: No (very decisive)

M: (embarrassed) Actually, many players said so at that time, and that Mark ~ ~

Yang: Can't you watch the game quietly?

Horse: ...

Ending:

M: That's all for today. Thanks for your explanation ~ ~

Yang: No, thank you for your wonderful comments ~ ~

M: Yes. . . . . . . Some people say Hayes doesn't defend well. . .

Yang: Who said that? (Very excited! ! ! ! ! )

Ma: Call him short, short, short, short, short, short, short, short.

Yang: Height is height, and defense is defense. Hayes is a technical defensive player.

M: Yes. . . . . . . . . . . -_-! ! ! (very embarrassed)

On one occasion, Ma Zhongyang and Yang Yi were broadcasting a Rockets game, and an advertisement for NCAA tickets was inserted in the middle. There is a local Rice University in Houston.

Yang: This is a local university called Rice University, which is as popular as a rocket in the local area.

M: Rice University?

Yang: This is what the local China people call the Rice University.

M: Is that what foreigners call it?

Yang: Foreigners are also called Rice University.

Do you care about rice?

Yang: ... whatever ...-_-! ! !

One day, the timberwolves' game was broadcast, and the timberwolves' defenders were hit in the reasonable collision zone.

M: Next, please ask Yang Yi to explain what a reasonable collision zone is.

Yang: The reasonable collision zone ... is ... um ... is ... Look! Garnett has the ball! ! !

Ma: ...............-_-# #

Later, the technical problems about the reasonable collision zone were never mentioned again.

Yang: I used to know a little girl. She grew up and worked as an editor at Sina ... Of course, she is also a girl now (I don't know why I have to emphasize it again-_-#). She worships Jordan, and I remember writing a poem that left a deep impression on me.

What poem? (The tone is full of incomparable worship and expectation)

Yang: (reading affectionately) "That night, I went to sell newspapers in Hutongkou and saw a bird. I thought it was Jordan.

Ma: (without thinking) What a fucking mess!

I mentioned a player who rarely plays.

Man: This player seldom plays ... ..

Ma: "... once a month anyway ..."

Yang: "Once a month? How long does it last once? "

Ma: Some netizens said, Yang Yi, do you have a girlfriend?

Yang: My boyfriend is.

One day, I explained that the Jazz scored a very difficult buzzer for the Nuggets and J. R. Smith.

Yang: Ah ... Ah (screaming)

Ma: Yang Yi, what's the matter with you? (follow)

Yang: Ah ... (continues screaming)

M: It seems that J R's three points have deeply hurt your heart. ...

Rockets away against Bobcats, Yao Ming scored his second career three points.

Ma: (Seriously) As a very important pitcher, Yao Ming is an important focus of the Rockets' perimeter.

Yang: ...

(The above is transferred from everyone)

Turn to the internet to see the commentary of Shenzhen TV station, and I can't find the earliest source:

1, halftime, cheerleading performance, cut to the front desk. The commentator said: This American colleague is a disgrace.

2. When the last advertisement came back, the last pose of Lala stopped for a long time, and the commentator said with regret: It's over.

3. At the home of Pistons, I watched the cheerleaders for a long time and made a closing statement: Detroit is an industrial city, and the dancers here are all factory girls, and they are not very good-looking.

The day before yesterday, during the pause, the camera aimed at a low-cut Mimi under the stage, explaining that he didn't speak for a long time. The lens lasted for a long time, and then it was enlarged a little. Finally, the commentator couldn't help saying, I'm afraid the audience can't see clearly.

The camera is rarely aimed at the sexy MM on the court. They didn't talk for a long time (at least 15 seconds), and then they finally felt a little cold. One of them: we can't comment on this.

(McGrady)

Narrator: When McGrady plays well, he can get 30-40 points per game. At this time, he is a god, but when he doesn't play well ... (pause) ... he is also a god and a psycho.

(Mu Dashu)

Narrator: The camera was given to Uncle Mu, the cheerleader.

Narrator: Uncle Mu paced up and down like an old man.

Narrator: Uncle Mu is basically a mascot now. He takes a bath and changes clothes every day, and sits for 48 minutes. Then, he took a bath, changed his clothes and went home. I wonder, you haven't been on for a minute. What clothes are you washing?

(Scola)

Narrator: (the camera gives Scola a close-up) Scola's face is long enough ... (pause) ... and needs a lot of facial cleanser.

(calf)

Narrator: (the camera gives Johnson a close-up of squinting and laughing) Johnson shows his white teeth, and I use carved cards ... (after a pause, I suddenly realize) Oh, carved cards seem to be washing powder.

Commentary: Dampier, the first center in the West, is almost the first center in the league.

Narrator: The first center in the West can also score two or three points every game.

Commentator: We are all the first centers in the West. (in a disdainful tone) What points do we get? We usually average three or four points, five or six rebounds and then six fouls.

Commentary: Wow, Dampier played super well today and got eight points.

Narrator: George is a real pain in the ass.

(Wells)

Narrator: Wells wore a yellow hair band this time. Red jersey and yellow headband, this taste is really ...

Narrator: (I'm glad to say) Wells wore a yellow headband on the court, and this time he wore a red headband, which improved his taste.

Narrator: Wells wore a yellow headband, then a red headband, and this time he wore a pink headband. This smell ... I won't say it.

Narrator: Wells looks like Zhu Yuanzhang, the Ming emperor of our country, with his nostrils facing the sky. NBA explained that he was a bit yellow and strong.

(Francis)

Narrator: Mr. Fu is very cool today. ...

Narrator: If Mr. Frodo goes to Shanghai, tell everyone, (learn from Francis) Yao Ming? That's my partner. Yao restaurant, go in and help yourself. ...

(Bosh)

Narrator: Bosh, we believe you ... We believe you can't do it.

(the year before last)

Narrator: (Yao Ming missed three points at the last critical moment. JVG has shit in his head.

Narrator: Swift forgot to bring his brain when he came on stage.

Another commentator: Yes, only half.

Narrator: It's not enough to bring everything.

Narrator: Look, look, Swift is on the court and doesn't know what he should do.

(jazz)

Commentary: Every time I see AK47, I always think of drug addicts in gangster movies.

Customer: This man is too thin. Such good conditions in the United States have not fattened him up.

Commentary: I wonder if he has any bad habits.

Commentary: (Boozer picks up a backcourt basket) Boozer is so strong that almost no one can rebound within one meter!

Commentary: (Camera aimed at kirilenko) It's too thin. I wonder if he has too much nightlife.

Commentary: Boozer looks fierce, as if someone always owes him money ...

Customer: No one owes him money ...

Commentary: And it's the kind that you don't pay back ...

Commentary: Coach Si Long! Si Long and JVG, both in hair and eyes, are in sharp contrast.

Commentary: Sir, this millsap must like to play volleyball. He can pull out any ball.

Commentary: Look at other people's rookie, not at all!

Customer: Yes, Okur's old tree has new flowers. The next spring …

Commentary: (Howard hits the ball) Well, Uncle Huo, this is an old tree with new flowers.

(salmon)

Commentary: This salmon ... looks interesting ... and is suitable as a mascot ... Paralympic mascot-_-||

(tinsley)

Commentary: Tinsley is now the leader of a team ... except that he can't shoot, he is a superstar in terms of eyes, movements and shooting.

(Marion)

Narrator: Marion really looks like a horse monkey.

Narrator: marion's arm, knee-length in ancient China, looked like an emperor! Such as Liu Bei. If Liu Bei is on the current China team, I think it is still possible for China to beat the American team.

Narrator: As we all know, Marion's three-pointer from outside is nothing to be afraid of.

(After a while, Marion throws another 3-pointer, explaining) You can't throw a few 3-pointers like this.

(Marion missed three points, and the commentator immediately said) You see, am I right? His three points are nothing to be afraid of.

Narrator: Marion's shooting posture is really weird. Players in our national women's basketball team prefer to use this posture.

(intermission)

Commentary: Today is the first half-time live cheerleading dance.

Guest: This is the last round and a feast for everyone.

(Ticket advertisement)

Comments: ...

Guest: ...

Commentary: Ah … This ticket is only $250 …

Guest: Or season tickets?

Commentary: I guess this location is not so cheap.

Customer: How about tickets for two games ... (hesitates)

Commentary: And buy one and get one free.

Love of animation)

Commentary: Ah! Schneider, this ball is wrong! You can't learn Hanamichi Sakuragi if you hang on for so long.

Guest:?

Commentary: Hanamichi Sakuragi likes to hang on the blue box after dunking.

Commentary: Haha, the narrator's name is a familiar character in Tom and Jerry.

Guest:?

Commentary: Tom!

(Love *)

Commentary: Yao Ming used it to shoot cattle over mountains and shoot arrows on horseback.

Customer: All it takes is an old man pushing a cart ... (Then they talk for a long time)

Commentary: Parker's waist is so good that his wife is still having an affair. ...

-Last season's Rockets-

Commentary: Mutombo, an African star from Zaire!

Commentary: Uncle Mu, in their hometown, the child recognized a tree when he was born. Draw a circle on the tree when the child is one year old. As a result, Uncle Mu once went back to his hometown and found that a fire broke out in his village and burned the tree, so Uncle Mu didn't know how old he was now.

Commentary: Why do you think Howard keeps laughing? It is estimated that there is something wrong with his facial nerve. It is said that he is ill ... (then he starts talking nonsense)

(Chakalidis rebounds)

Commentary: This center is too bad, tall and stupid.

Customer: Still slow.

Commentary: Yes! It also takes up salary space, not to mention. ...

Guest: I think he and Spanoulis have little chance in the playoffs.

Commentary: There will be no future in the future.

(Alston misses the ground pass to Chaka)

Commentary: At this level, you can still play streetball.

Customer: It is difficult for him to catch the ball at such a low price.

Commentary: We usually don't pass this kind of ball when playing.

Guest: Yes.

Chorus: Hahaha ...

(The camera is always aimed at Spang, who is sunken on the bench)

Commentary: Spang's eyes are so melancholy, just like the melancholy prince of the rocket.

(McGrady greets Yao Ming with a pick and roll)

Commentary: (learning from McGrady) Please, give me a break.

T-Mac can score three points without waiting for Yao Ming to pick and roll.

Commentary: McGrady voted, and he directly voted for an NBA commentary that was a little yellow and a little strong, whether you were Yao Ming or Yao Hei.

Rocket vs Knicks

Speaking of Thomas' scandal about the Leaf Association, the commentator said: This is too bad for unity ... Oh, don't invite me.

(Wells)

Commentary: Wells' free throw posture is very strange. Other players are more like stackhouse's free throws, which are also very strange and deep. There is also an advanced free throw in the NBA, which is commonly known as the inverted urinal.

Commentary: Wells' free throw is worrying. (Wells didn't get a penalty) ... He was not admitted for fear of success.

Commentary: The tape on Wells' head is cute ... Battier has tape on his head ... Why does Yao Ming have tape on his face? Is it a locker room gang fight? -_-|

(2008-0 1- 17 bucks VS eagles)

Commentary: Buck is a shallow field.

Guest: ...

Commentary: Not as deep as Auburn Palace. Buck, it just needs a step.

Customer: It's covered now.

Commentary: In the past, when there was no roof and the heating was not well burned, everyone in the audience was given a warm water bag first.

Commentary: Nobody wants to pass the ball to Yi Jianlian at all. You see, Mike Reid would rather be covered than pass the ball to Yi Jianlian.

Commentary: Reid, no matter who you come, he will pick and roll, block the wall and run. I vote for me. You like to build a wall and run away. That's your business. It's your pleasure. It's none of my business anyway.

Guest: A banner of "Easy Refueling" was displayed in the audience.

Commentary: The word "Jia" was blocked and became "You". What does "little oil" mean? It means easy to play ball like a black man.

Guest: ...

Commentary: You also give him some tricks on the court and so on.

Commentary: Some viewers say that we are Super Yao Mi and Super Easy Honey. In fact, we are very objective-_ |

Commentary: Gazuridge also stumbles at his feet-Foshan has no shadow feet.

Commentary: Wooderson (Eagle's coach) is still communicating with the referee.

Guest: There is no limit to communication!

Commentary: The referee also ignored him. You said that if Phil Jackson comes, the referee is still under some pressure.

Commentary: Simmons made a successful layup, and Wooderson showed an evil smile at the corner of his mouth. Simmons layup, what is Wooderson laughing at?

Commentary: Simmons' expression today is very dull, just like Lu Xun's detailed wife Lin. Only an occasional round of eyes can show that he is a living thing.

Commentary: Bucks won three games in a row without Reid and lost three games in a row with Reid.

Customer: Why?

Commentary: Without a troublemaker, a bit yellow and a bit strong NBA commentary.

Commentary: Mike Reid was replaced.

Guest: The fourth quarter came up so early?

Commentary: Brothers, don't panic, the boss is coming up.

Customer: I guess everyone is more panicked.

Commentary: What do you mean? Coach k, are you giving up?

Commentary: (Reid asks for the ball inside, Bell doesn't pass the ball, Reid runs back, and the commentator gloats) Hey, now it's Bell's turn not to pass the ball to Reid!

Commentary: Now is the last critical moment.

Guest: Reed takes the ball.

Commentary: Mike Reid! Mike reed. Mike Reid, stop fooling around.