Naughty and exquisite humorous copy

1. Sometimes I listen to music without headphones, just to reduce the chance for others to communicate with me.

2. A person's idea will become. I used to want to get rich, but now I just want to get rid of poverty.

3. Work every year, worry every year, work overtime every day like a monkey, work overtime without pay, and get scolded for no reason every day.

Four. Being single for a long time, Jiaozi will forcibly separate when she sees two people sticking together.

It is not shameful to sell your soul and principles, but it is shameful not to sell at a good price.

6. It turns out that Swallow became a director, Wei Zi became a director, Mei became a director, Jinsuo became a goddess, and only Erkang became an expression pack.

I can't solve anything that money can solve.

8. Some girls need high pixels to buy mobile phones. Do you think you are ugly enough?

If you hit me, I will hit you. If you hit me, I will hit you. If you give me a knife, brother, I may die.

I think I haven't eaten chicken for a long time. Otherwise, I was a little excited when I saw the feather duster yesterday.

1 1. I won't buy incense in the future. In the past, 700 million cups circled the earth three times, and later 10 billion cups circled the earth three times. The cup must be getting smaller.

12. Nothing else matters. Now I just feel that my family is healthy and I can make a fortune.

Thirteen. I especially envy those who can't eat when they are sad and then lose weight. I don't have such a moment anyway. No matter how sad I am, I insist on eating.

Fourteen. On the way, I met an old man with something on his back. I want to go up and help him move. I casually said, "old thing, I'll help you carry it."

15. If you like a handsome guy, please don't take immediate measures. Get to know him first, and before long, you will find that his friends are more handsome.

15. Life is like the sea. Some people struggle in the wind and rain, and some people sit on the boat and spray your melon seeds with melon seeds!

I was robbed of my bag yesterday, and I was very sad. I cried all night. I really can't figure out where I am worse than my bag.

18. If you are hungry, you can call it losing weight, or you are too lazy to go out and turn around. If it is done well, it is called success, otherwise it is called not hitting the south wall and not looking back.

19. After all, women are emotional and have no immunity to all kinds of small animals, such as Bugatti Veyron, Hummer, Jaguar, Land Rover, BMW and, of course, Tmall.

20. Looks are given by the previous generation, education is set by the previous generation, ideas are taught by the previous generation, and the environment is left by the previous generation. How dare you say that each generation is worse than the next?

2 1. A passerby stopped a taxi and asked the driver: How long does it take from here to the airport? Driver: It will take a long time. Passerby: How long will it take at least? Driver: It takes longer to ride a horse.

Twenty-two Get up in the morning and say to my mother, "I will buy a pair of sunglasses tomorrow to cover my ugliness!" " My mother directly replied to me: "There are not enough sunglasses. It is almost enough to buy a helmet. "

Twenty-three The teacher asked to write a composition entitled "A Corner of Campus" to describe the scenery of a certain place on campus. I'm sure everyone wrote it when they were young. Brother loafer wrote: I found a dime when I was playing on campus today.

24. Some songs fall in love with the prelude, some people fall in love at first sight, and some homework turns over the first page and they don't want to write.