How to improve communicative competence

Question 1: How to cultivate your social skills? Communication skills:

First, talk to others boldly and actively. It's better to say it than not to say it. Don't be afraid to say more:

Try to relax yourself when you are nervous. Take a quiet deep breath, calm your breath, and add a little strength when you exhale, and your heart will be practical. Laughter has a good effect on relaxing the whole body tension. Smiling can regulate breathing, and it can also make the brain react flexibly and concentrate.

Practice some good topics at ordinary times. Usually, we should pay attention to observing other people's topics, understand attractive and unattractive topics, and consciously practice talking about things that can arouse other people's interest while avoiding topics that cause adverse effects.

3 avoid the training of bad topics. You should avoid things that you don't fully understand. If you speak with a little knowledge, it will not bring any benefits to others, but will leave a bad impression of vanity. If someone asks you these questions and you can't answer them, it's even more embarrassing. Avoid topics that you are not interested in. If you are not interested, how can you expect others to be interested in your topic?

4 Training enriches the topic content. If you have a topic, you must have something to say. Content comes from life, from your observation and feelings about life. Such people are always passionate about many people and things around them.

Second, read more books and participate in outdoor activities, so that you can communicate with people more, your personality will naturally become cheerful and your experience will be rich.

1 Speak politely with strangers (not in the same tone as friends at first), first understand each other's personality, and then know how to communicate with each other. First look at whether this person and himself are the same kind of people (way of thinking, social concepts, values, etc.). If this person is similar to you, it will be easy to get along with, because everyone has the same idea, and you can also make friends with some optimistic people. Getting along with people requires sincerity, friendliness and initiative. You take the initiative to communicate with others!

If there is no exchange of ideas, listening to others is a good exchange. Listen attentively and don't go in one ear and out the other.

Find a topic to chat with others. First, learn to be a listener, listen to more lectures, and you can enjoy any lecture. You can also find lecture materials in the library or university campus. Listen to others in the process of communicating with friends and elders, so as to collect expressible materials every day and learn other people's language expression skills. Can do live audience, debate, oral English, host and other competitions, learn other people's language expression. The more things a person listens to, the more things in his mind will be enriched. Naturally, when he communicates with people, his language can be improved in rhetoric, context and expression tone. Language is a bridge of communication. If the language is well expressed, you can communicate and do things. If you don't know what to say, you must first learn to find a topic. The above methods will suit you. Work hard! To understand each other between people, the most important thing is to communicate more, exchange ideas, care for each other in language and behavior, and treat each other sincerely. Friends get along with each other by being sincere, trusting, tolerant, friendly, caring and supporting each other.

Third, make yourself humorous:

1 When you tell an interesting story, don't show the results in a hurry, just hold your horses, show the power of humor with a unique tone and dramatic plot, and create suspense for the audience before the most crucial sentence is said.

When telling jokes, every pause, every special tone, every corresponding expression, gesture and posture should contribute to the play of humor. Emphasis on important words, the use of stress, pause and other sounds to convey meaning skills, to promote the audience's thinking, deepen the audience's impression.

Humor in language must be used according to specific objects, specific situations and specific contexts, and the words spoken cannot be out of date.

Don't laugh when telling jokes, it's the least popular. At the end of each speech, it is best to inspire all the audience to smile from the heart.

Fourth, self-confidence is very important. Believe in yourself, let go of your mood, do things with a normal heart and make yourself optimistic. Smile more. Smiling makes people feel relaxed.

When you first arrive in a new environment, you need to adapt to it. In this process, you will meet new friends and establish new friendships. Don't be afraid to be shy, say the wrong thing, make friends with them sincerely, and others will be willing to accept it.

Everything is difficult at the beginning, please don't be afraid, be bold!

To sum up: confident, bold, active, positive, persistent, quiet ... >>

Question 2: How to improve communication skills? I hope the master can give me some skills. Social skills are closely related to social experience. If you can improve your social skills, people's daily social life will also be improved. People can not only reduce conflicts with others, but also make themselves have a more pleasant experience with others.

Some people think that social skills are innate qualities or attributes. For example, a person with high social skills is naturally outgoing and sociable. As the saying goes, a leopard cannot change his spots. Most psychologists disagree with this view. On the contrary, they think that as long as they can identify the factors that can predict social ability, they can design some courses to train this ability.

To effectively improve social skills, we can start from two aspects, one is the ability to distinguish social situations, and the other is to improve the ability to gain insight into the psychological state of others.

In order to achieve social goals effectively, we must act accordingly. The social environment is changing rapidly, and the objects of communication also have different characteristics. To adapt to different social environments and people, it is necessary to have elite observation and cognitive ability.

The ability to identify the environment is an important part of social skills. If a person can distinguish the subtle differences between situations, he can often master the changes of social environment and make appropriate behaviors to adapt to different and ever-changing environments.

This view of keeping up with the times is not only advocated by modern western psychology. In fact, it is often mentioned in China's ancient books. For example, "The Doctrine of the Mean" says: the way of state ownership and the words of * * * are enough to rejuvenate the country; There is nothing the country can do. Silence is enough. This shows that remonstrance and silence are both appropriate ways to deal with things, but which way courtiers take can produce better results, and it depends on whether the country they are in is a country with Tao or no Tao. Take Yang Xiu mentioned at the beginning of this chapter as an example. He is a witty wit, but his master Cao Cao is a suspicious person. Yang Xiu was smart enough to say what Cao Cao thought many times, so Cao Cao was killed. If his master is a magnanimous man, Yang Xiu will not be killed, but will be entrusted with an important task. Although some people will lament that Yang Xiu was born at an untimely time, it seems that Yang Xiu only cares about the momentary quip and ignores the thought and character of the other party (Cao Cao), so he said something that was in line with the facts but not in line with the other party's mind, and ended his life in vain. It can be seen that in order to successfully achieve social goals, we must judge the changes in the objective situation and adapt to various social situations.

In one study, we used some fictional situations and then asked the subjects how they would react in these situations. Two of them are:

(1) You are afraid of going to the dentist, but now you have to go there to have your teeth filled.

(2) You are held hostage by a group of armed men in a public building.

In both cases, people can choose to carefully observe the surrounding danger signals. In the second case, for example, we can pay attention to what weapons * * * has. They can also try to divert their attention from some dangerous signals that will make them nervous. Of course, in the case of seeing a dentist, actively monitoring the danger signals will only make you more nervous, more tense and more painful. But in the case of threats, paying attention to the danger signals can improve the chances of escape. Among the tested people, some people can better distinguish the difference between the two situations, choose to distract themselves when they see a dentist, and choose to observe the environment when they are threatened. Some people's discrimination ability is obviously low, and they will choose to observe the environment under different circumstances.

Our research also shows that the higher the discriminating ability, the higher the social skills. When they associate with parents, teachers, friends and people they don't like, they can better achieve the purpose of communication and enhance friendship.

There is also evidence that people with high discrimination will experience more pleasant experiences of making friends and they will be less depressed.

It should be emphasized that conforming to the situation does not mean blindly following the changes of the situation and changing your behavior, nor does it mean blindly obeying the wishes of the other party.

A person with high discrimination ability is not necessarily a social chameleon, but only knows to go along with it blindly. They have their own goals in life, which can also be altruistic goals (such as raising money for a hospital). People with high discriminating ability, when pursuing these goals, know how to judge the situation, which can not only help those who are unwilling to donate at first, but also make them feel happy after donating ... >>

Question 3: How to improve communication skills Many introverted people want to change their introverted personality, improve their communication skills, and then have good interpersonal relationships. So they read a lot of books on interpersonal relationship and learned a lot of interpersonal skills, but they found that the effect was little and not obvious. This shows that learning skills alone is not enough. They can't have good interpersonal relationships not only because they lack skills, but also because of many deep-seated reasons. At the same time, does this also explain from one side that the current interpersonal relationship books are flawed and incomplete? Introverts need to change and improve their beliefs, attitudes and skills if they want to have good interpersonal relationships.

First, belief: establish the belief of "win-win" (equality and mutual benefit)

If you want to have good interpersonal relationships, you must have the idea of equality and mutual benefit. In fashionable words, it is to have a win-win thinking.

There are several modes of thinking in dealing with interpersonal relationships:

1. I won and you lost:

We have been taught since childhood to strengthen this concept. Do better in exams than others, run faster and jump higher in sports competitions than others, and win the championship. In a word, only by surpassing others and winning can we feel happy. We regard life as an arena. To be successful and happy, we must surpass others and leave others behind.

In addition, selfish people hold the idea that I win and you lose.

2. I lost and you won;

People who lack self-confidence and self-esteem often think so.

They dare not stand their ground, want nothing, compromise at the expense of personal interests, and seek peace at the expense.

3. lose both sides:

On the surface, no one will benefit from doing so, and it seems that no one will do so. But some people just want to do this! What I can't get, you can't sacrifice others. For revenge, I would rather sacrifice myself than drag you down.

4. Win-win:

Win-win is based on the concept of equality and mutual benefit. Earn your own profits without harming the interests of others. If you don't set yourself against others, you and I are not hostile parties, but comrades in the same trench. We share weal and woe and work together to create a better future.

I win, you lose (selfish), I lose, you win (compromise), and both lose (lose), which can't make people have good interpersonal relationships. If you want to have a good interpersonal relationship, you must have a win-win thinking and an idea of equality and mutual benefit.

4. Understand others and express yourself (the balance between "understanding" and "expression")

Interpersonal communication is inseparable from communication. Communication is to understand others by listening, and to make others understand themselves by expressing. Introverts are not good at expressing themselves. How to speak is their weakness, and they are more willing to listen. But their listening is passive. They listen to what others say, but they are not good at grasping the conversation process by asking questions, and they are not good at letting others think that you are willing to listen to him by agreeing. Therefore, this advantage of being willing to listen has not been fully exerted in introverts.

5. tolerate others and take the initiative to admit mistakes (the balance between "tolerance" and "admitting mistakes")

When others make mistakes, tolerate each other; Apologize when you make a mistake.

Introverts often dare not take the initiative to admit their mistakes because of their lack of self-confidence, for fear that doing so will let others know that they have made mistakes and look down on themselves. So he is afraid of making mistakes, cautious, timid, hiding mistakes, afraid of being known. Or go to the other extreme, whether it is your own fault or not, always admit your own mistakes, so as to gain others' sympathy and pity for you. In fact, whether he dares to admit his mistakes or keeps admitting them, it reflects that he has no confidence in others to forgive his mistakes and his ability to correct them and turn the situation around. This makes him prefer to do nothing, so as not to talk too much and make too many mistakes.

6.……

……

Through the above analysis, introverts can't have good interpersonal relationships, not only because of personality factors, but also because of many ideological deviations. And the more analysis, the more problems. But this is good. Knowing where the key lies, you can start to improve and improve.

In addition, we also see that most interpersonal books only talk about the love part of interpersonal communication, such as respecting others, being honest and trustworthy, being interested in others, understanding others, tolerating others, etc., while ignoring the courage part of balancing love in interpersonal communication. The interpersonal relationship established in this way is biased and there is still a certain distance from our ideal win-win interpersonal relationship. I have been neglected for a long time, and I am introverted ... >>

Question 4: How to improve communicative competence? You just worked ~? If so, this is normal. Everyone will have such a transition period. Socialization is honed by time and experience. The more time you spend dealing with people, the more experience you have. Before you know it, you can have a language with your friends or clients. I know you may be introverted, which also has certain advantages. People with this personality tend to be more practical and diligent. However, in this extremely realistic society, social public relations are also in an important link. Take your time, don't be afraid, and meet more people. This will lay a foundation for your social interaction. The most important thing is to have the same language when talking to others, which will be easy to talk to. Be sure to grasp the "points" ~!

Question 5: How to improve communication and interpersonal skills;

First, talk to others boldly and actively. It's better to say it than not to say it. Don't be afraid to say more:

Try to relax yourself when you are nervous. Take a quiet deep breath, calm your breath, and add a little strength when you exhale, and your heart will be practical. Laughter has a good effect on relaxing the whole body tension. Smiling can regulate breathing, and it can also make the brain react flexibly and concentrate.

Practice some good topics at ordinary times. Usually, we should pay attention to observing other people's topics, understand attractive and unattractive topics, and consciously practice talking about things that can arouse other people's interest while avoiding topics that cause adverse effects.

3 avoid the training of bad topics. You should avoid things that you don't fully understand. If you speak with a little knowledge, it will not bring any benefits to others, but will leave a bad impression of vanity. If someone asks you these questions and you can't answer them, it's even more embarrassing. Avoid topics that you are not interested in. If you are not interested, how can you expect others to be interested in your topic?

4 Training enriches the topic content. If you have a topic, you must have something to say. Content comes from life, from your observation and feelings about life. Such people are always passionate about many people and things around them.

Second, read more books and participate in outdoor activities, so that you can communicate with people more, your personality will naturally become cheerful and your experience will be rich.

1 Speak politely with strangers (not in the same tone as friends at first), first understand each other's personality, and then know how to communicate with each other. First look at whether this person and himself are the same kind of people (way of thinking, social concepts, values, etc.). If this person is similar to you, it will be easy to get along with, because everyone has the same idea, and you can also make friends with some optimistic people. Getting along with people requires sincerity, friendliness and initiative. You take the initiative to communicate with others!

If there is no exchange of ideas, listening to others is a good exchange. Listen attentively and don't go in one ear and out the other.

Find a topic to chat with others. First, learn to be a listener, listen to more lectures, and you can enjoy any lecture. You can also find lecture materials in the library or university campus. Listen to others in the process of communicating with friends and elders, so as to collect expressible materials every day and learn other people's language expression skills. Can do live audience, debate, oral English, host and other competitions, learn other people's language expression. The more things a person listens to, the more things in his mind will be enriched. Naturally, when he communicates with people, his language can be improved in rhetoric, context and expression tone. Language is a bridge of communication. If the language is well expressed, you can communicate and do things. If you don't know what to say, you must first learn to find a topic. The above methods will suit you. Work hard! To understand each other between people, the most important thing is to communicate more, exchange ideas, care for each other in language and behavior, and treat each other sincerely. Friends get along with each other by being sincere, trusting, tolerant, friendly, caring and supporting each other.

Third, make yourself humorous:

1 When you tell an interesting story, don't show the results in a hurry, just hold your horses, show the power of humor with a unique tone and dramatic plot, and create suspense for the audience before the most crucial sentence is said.

When telling jokes, every pause, every special tone, every corresponding expression, gesture and posture should contribute to the play of humor. Emphasis on important words, the use of stress, pause and other sounds to convey meaning skills, to promote the audience's thinking, deepen the audience's impression.

Humor in language must be used according to specific objects, specific situations and specific contexts, and the words spoken cannot be out of date.

Don't laugh when telling jokes, it's the least popular. At the end of each speech, it is best to inspire all the audience to smile from the heart.

Fourth, self-confidence is very important. Believe in yourself, let go of your mood, do things with a normal heart and make yourself optimistic. Smile more. Smiling makes people feel relaxed.

When you first arrive in a new environment, you need to adapt to it. In this process, you will meet new friends and establish new friendships. Don't be afraid to be shy, say the wrong thing, make friends with them sincerely, and others will be willing to accept it.

Everything is difficult at the beginning, please don't be afraid, be bold!

To sum up: since >>

Question 6: How to improve your interpersonal skills must first learn to praise others, encourage others, and praise others sincerely; Also take the initiative to communicate with people, initiative is the most critical point; And learn to be humorous and talkative. In fact, you don't need to read books on interpersonal communication. You should read more books to increase your cultural background and self-cultivation, learn more and get along with everyone. Pay attention to your image, appearance and gestures when interacting with people. Attention, everyone. Don't be too perfect, no one likes to associate with people who are particularly perfect and superior. We should also establish an open mind, have a spirit of cooperation, listen carefully and reflect on feedback. Actively participate in activities, communicate with people, be good at talking, make friends, find people with the same hobbies and interests, and gradually become cheerful. You should be open-minded and polite, so that you can make good friends and establish good relations ... As a leader, 1, people-oriented, formulate a humanized system and act according to law. 2. Improve work efficiency. Nature meets the needs of both sides and is invincible, achieving the greatest goal of interpersonal communication. How to make yourself cheerful and improve your interpersonal skills? First of all, read more books, think more and cultivate your own connotation (this is the internal cause). Second, make more friends and see how others do it. Imitation before innovation (external cause). Finally, with the improvement of your ability, you will have a sense of accomplishment and become cheerful and positive. If you want everyone to like you, you must like everyone first. There are many ways to communicate. In fact, you just need to be yourself and make changes. First, you should be generous, no matter what you do (take care of yourself emotionally), you should be natural and graceful. Second, you should be mature and calm, just don't get angry so easily. Third, you should have a sense of humor. This is also very important. Tell jokes when others tell them.

Question 7: How to improve your communicative competence? Overcome timidity and fear.

How to talk to strangers

People say once raw, twice cooked. "Twice" is not difficult, but it is difficult to say "once" from the beginning. Where is the difficulty? It's hard to face strangers. I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say, and I don't know if it will make people feel unhappy. ...

When I was engaged in human resource management in a company, I recruited a group of new employees. What puzzles me is that when they applied for this job, they all talked about Kan Kan and answered all my questions like a stream. However, after entering the company, many people's weakness of not being talkative was "exposed", and even if they were asked to say something welcome, they would blush and feel very shy. Later, I chatted with other residents and asked them if they felt uncomfortable in the new environment. Most of them bowed their heads and whispered, "I'm not used to talking to strangers." But one of them asked me, "I don't know what to do to integrate myself into the group?"

I smiled. Then I asked another tight-lipped new employee, "Do you always talk to people like you are rushing for an exam?" He nodded and said "Yes". I said, "You have language phobia and depression."

Language phobia and depression syndrome are mostly manifested in front of strangers. Dale. Carnegie mentioned the repression of interpersonal relationships in his "The Weakness of Human Nature". What causes depression? It is timid. Because I am afraid of life, my tongue will roll and be incoherent. The more you want to make your words perfect, the less you can express your meaning. Just like the more fully prepared a singer is for the first time, the more the singing effect will be compromised-stage fright.

Fear of life is a state of mind. Inferiority is the source of this state. Many people feel uncomfortable in a strange environment, mainly because they are afraid of being laughed at for saying something wrong when communicating with strangers. This inferiority complex will naturally make them often accuse themselves of rudeness at a certain moment, thus destroying the atmosphere of communication with others. Some people think that they have said a word or two in front of strangers, but in fact they still haven't managed their mouths. They wish they could bite off their tongues. However, this kind of "self-pity" can only make you more nervous, and it is not helpful to improve your interpersonal skills. The more I remind myself not to say the wrong thing next time, the more I say the wrong thing.

How to avoid the embarrassment of language communication caused by fear of life? I offer several methods here, so I might as well try them:

Ask questions and explore assume that the other person is an ordinary passer-by, and then, like asking the way, find some questions that you know well but pretend not to know, and let the other person answer them, so that you gain the initiative on the phone. Whether the other person's answer is right or wrong, you need to listen carefully. Even if the other person says something wrong, you should thank him. Because, the purpose of this kind of question is not to find any answers, but to open the floodgate of language communication between you and the other party.

Once the floodgate of dialogue between the two sides is opened and flows downstream, the original strangeness will naturally disappear.

Usually, no one will turn down an enlightened consultant maliciously. As long as the other person is willing to give you a ride, your expected social plan has been half successful. Of course, this way sounds hypocritical, but for those who are afraid of life, it is an effective way to build their self-confidence in speaking.

Questioning is only suitable for talking to a stranger, not for contacting a team.

When you meet a stranger easily, sometimes you just need to grasp a certain detail of the other person's work or life, and you will successfully knock on the door of communication between the two sides.

Observe the strangers around you carefully to see if there is anything special about them, such as whether the other party wears exotic ornaments, such as the style of the mobile phone you like very much, such as the brand of cigarettes smoked by the other party ... Talking about these details is likely to arouse the interest of the other party immediately. It's best to choose a topic with a brisk pace and no need to think, so that people won't be disgusted with your conversation. Sometimes, even if we are speechless, just giving each other a knowing smile will bring us closer.

The first conversation passed smoothly, paving the way for further communication in the second meeting; The second time, you might as well call him by his first name and tell some harmless jokes. But no matter what you say, you should talk less. Talking too much will not win the respect of the other party.

When the other person intends to communicate with you, no matter what the other person says is right or wrong, don't deny the other person, because after all, you are not familiar with it. Once you are rejected, the remaining gap is ... >>

Question 8: How to improve your communicative competence? First of all, realize the importance of language expression ability.

The ability of language expression is one of the basic qualities necessary for modern talents. In modern society, due to the rapid development of economy, people's communication is more and more frequent, and the importance of language expression ability is becoming more and more important. Good eloquence is increasingly regarded as an essential ability for modern people.

As modern people, we should not only have new ideas and opinions, but also express them well in front of others. We should not only contribute to the society with our own actions, but also infect and convince others with our own language.

As far as occupation is concerned, people from all walks of life in modern society need eloquence: for politicians and diplomats, eloquence and eloquence are basic qualities; Business workers sell goods, attract customers and entrepreneurs manage enterprises, all of which need eloquence. In people's daily communication, eloquent people can make plain topics attractive, while clumsy people will sound dull even if the topic content is no matter how good. Some suggestions are passed by people with good eloquence, but those with poor eloquence can't get them even after many times.

David, former president of the American Medical Association? Dr. Auman once said that we should strive to cultivate the ability to let others enter our thoughts and hearts, and clearly convey our thoughts and ideas to others in front of others, in the crowd and in front of the public. When we make continuous progress in this way, we will find that our true self is shaping an unprecedented image in people's hearts and producing an unprecedented shock.

In a word, language ability is the main way to improve our quality and develop our potential, the priceless treasure to control our lives, transform our lives and pursue our career success, and the only way to success.

Second, test your language quotient.

Language quotient (LQ) refers to the quotient of a person's ability to learn, understand and master a language. Specifically, it refers to a person's language thinking ability, speech expression ability and adaptability in language communication.

Language ability is not innate, but a skill acquired by people through acquired learning. Although there are genetic or brain structural abnormalities, there are language advantages or language disabilities. In real life, due to different subjective and objective conditions, time spent and learning needs of everyone, the speed and level of acquiring language quotient ability are also different. This shows that people's language quotient ability is mainly strengthened and improved by acquired language training and language communication.

Language is the most widely distributed and average ability of human beings. Among all kinds of human intelligence, linguistic intelligence is listed as the first kind of intelligence. Facts show that language plays an important role in people's lives and is the core factor for people to develop their intelligence and social skills.

For a long time, people always think that language is just a communication tool, and we must master it and use it skillfully. In fact, this kind of understanding is only based on the communicative function of language. Judging from the relationship between language and speakers, language is a kind of "multimedia" ―― it can be used as a tool as well as a reflection of thinking ability. For example, it is also to express a meaning. Some people will "punch lines" while others "can't express the meaning"? This is the difference in psychological ability. If a person's other abilities are excellent, and at the same time, his language quotient ability is gradually improving, then he will definitely be better. Quotient can not only make people think with their brains, but also express their thinking problems in words at any time. If we speak with accurate language, proper rhetoric and beautiful pronunciation, we will be more handy in all kinds of work, more successful in our careers and more colorful in our lives.

People's language communication and interpersonal skills are more important in this increasingly competitive 2 1 century, and language quotient will bring us new opportunities for survival and improve people's quality in all directions.

We live in a world with a sound language, and language ability is an extremely important survival ability for everyone in his life. The level of language communication is the level of language quotient ability. Through the following tests, we will determine our language quotient ability.