How to make people speechless with advanced satire?

The words of the brainless senior satirist are as follows:

First, don't laugh at others for short circuit. At least they still have electricity in their heads. Your battery has long been broken, so you can only change a kitchen knife and washbasin.

Second, I will never judge a book by its cover, but I really have to think about it because of your appearance!

Third, I'm not looking down on you, but I'm too lazy to look at you at all!

Fourth, others look good when they smile, but you are different. You look funny.

I don't know why you don't think with that thing around your neck. What can you do besides setting off how beautiful the world is?

6. All the good things in the world have been taken away by you. I think you can really be happy. Is there a difference between clothes reaching out and food opening your mouth?

7. I have acne in adolescence. Do you envy menopause?

Eight, you are really different from those sluts outside. You're just a bitch. You're not slutty at all.

Nine, "a woman without talent is virtue. Why do you read so many books? " "In order not to marry someone like you!"

Ten, good-looking people have youth, you only have acne!

Eleven, at the age of teenage flowers, you have grown into a succulent plant.

I haven't heard anyone brag about being so fresh and refined for a long time.

Thirteen, don't use your thinking to challenge the IQ of normal people.

Fourteen, you cook tonight, I think you will embellish it!

Fifteen, when I was a child, I was called a turtle grandson by my grandmother and a rabbit by Ma Ma. When I grew up, I was called single dog by others. You will be the history of animals all your life.

Sixteen, the old saying goes, losing is a blessing, I wish you happiness in the future.