Tell me some campus jokes.

Xiaoquan is a martial arts fan and has a clear understanding of martial arts.

Once, when the teacher was reading the text My Hand, he saw Xiaoquan peeking at a martial arts novel and asked him what the title of the text was. XiaoQuan shook his head. In order to enlighten him, the teacher stretched out a hand and asked, "What is this?" Xiao Quan replied: "Iron sand palm!" The teacher shook his hand angrily, and Xiao Quan said, "Shaolin Boxing!" The teacher's hand was half stretched and half held, but Xiaoquan answered faster: "God eagle claw!" " "The teacher was very angry and threw the chalk head out." Ah! It turns out that teachers can also shoot meteors.

The female teacher drew an apple on the blackboard and then asked, "What's this, little friend?" The children said in unison, "Donkey!" The female teacher ran out of the classroom crying and complained to the headmaster, "The children laugh at people." The headmaster came into the classroom and said with a serious expression, "Why did you make the teacher cry?" Ah! And drew an ass on the blackboard! "

One day, the headmaster walked into a classroom at random to prepare for the lecture before class. Finally, the bell rang, and the geography teacher came into the classroom with a globe and put it on the podium. After returning the gift, he said, "What did you get in the classroom?"

The students all replied: headmaster.

The geography teacher said angrily, is the headmaster a thing?

Student: The headmaster is nothing.

When we were in high school, some teachers were very bad to our students. A group of students have been oppressed for a long time. They are discussing how to punish their teachers. On this day, the teacher is in class. A boy sitting in the back row showed a painful expression and groaned gently with his hand over his stomach. The teacher ignored him and went on preaching. The middle teacher just turned around and wrote notes on the blackboard. Suddenly, the boy is "concave" ... Wow! "(Vomiting) A boy at the same table poured a bottle of eight-treasure porridge on the boy's table at a very fast speed. When the teacher turned around, he saw that the table was full of yellow and white things. At this time, another boy took out a small spoon, scooped up the things on the table one by one, and said while chewing, "Hey, this guy ate peanuts at noon." The teacher looked at it, said "Wow … concave …" and then vomited wildly.

A girl in my class was listening to the walkman in the back row. When her ears were blocked, she spoke loudly and said to her deskmate, "Please let me know when the teacher comes." Almost all the students heard it. The teacher is no exception, looking at that classmate and saying, "I can't go there!" " "

At a school party, teachers (more than 60 elderly women) gave up the project. The students booed: the teacher also gave a program and danced. A boy shouted, "Dance a pole!" The teacher didn't understand the meaning of pole dancing, thinking that she was going to dance, and quickly said, "I'm old, but I was ok when I was young, everyone ..."

In high school, we had exams. We had a geography class. The teacher reported a place name on it, and we answered minerals below. After talking about many places, the teacher suddenly asked, "What is produced in Jiangnan?" The boys in the class said in unison: "Jiangnan produces beautiful women!"

Sitting in the last row to sleep, next to the back door of the classroom, my deskmate wakes me up every time after class, and then I go straight out of the classroom to bathe in the sunshine. Once in class, the teacher asked me to answer questions for the first time. I was awakened by my deskmate while sleeping. I got up and pushed the door out of the classroom. Five minutes later, I felt very strange outside the classroom, and then I hurried back to the classroom. All the teachers and students were frightened.

In high school, the political teacher said in class: "Developed capitalist countries, especially the United States, always bully other countries when they are strong. Our socialist China will not be like this. Even if it is strong, it will not bully others ... "My deskmate replied," How do you know if you are strong? " The whole class burst into laughter.