Ask a few jokes about parrots

The child stole the parrot from the prostitutes' home. As soon as he entered the door, the parrot called: Move! Seeing his mother, he shouted: The boss has changed, too! Seeing his sister, he shouted, Miss has changed! Seeing his father, he shouted, I'm still an old customer!

It is said that a lady bought a female parrot on a whim. I didn't expect to bring it home. The first thing it said was, "Do you want to sleep with me?" When the lady heard this, she thought: No, outsiders thought I taught this, which didn't ruin my lady image. So she tried her best to give the parrot something elegant, but the female parrot was determined and would only say, "Do you want to sleep with me?" ..... What should I do?

A bloody case caused by an underwear burst into laughter: a lecherous bull

Super Mary Jay Chou version of beauty spy seduction

When the lady lost her claim, I heard that the priest also kept a parrot (male), and that parrot, instead of swearing, was a devout believer and prayed most of the time every day. So the lady went to the priest for help. After understanding her purpose, the priest said with a slightly difficult face, "Well, it's very difficult. In fact, I didn't teach the parrot anything deliberately. The reason why it is so pious may be that it has been edified here for a long time." Seeing that the lady was very upset, the priest said, "Tell you what, you bring that parrot to me and I'll put them together. I hope that after a period of time, your parrot can be influenced. That's all I can do. Whether it works or not depends on God's will ... "That's all the lady can do. Isn't there a saying: near Zhu Zhechi? Give it a try.

So she took the parrot to the priest. The priest put two parrots together as promised. At first, the female parrot was still a little stiff. Seeing the male parrot in the corner of the cage, praying silently, I really couldn't bear to bother. But she still couldn't help herself. Finally, clear voice said, "Do you want to sleep with me?"

When the male parrot heard this, he stopped praying and turned to look at the female parrot. Suddenly, he burst into tears: "Thank God, my wish of praying for so many years has finally come true ..."

There is a bird lover who likes parrots very much. One day, he passed a bird shop and found a parrot being auctioned. He saw that the parrot was beautiful in color and decided to buy it, so he shouted, "I am willing to pay 1 dollars for it." Then someone bid: "I am willing to pay 2 yuan dollars!" The bird lover didn't want to give the parrot away, so he called 3 yuan again ... but another voice seemed to be against him, and it didn't stop until the bird lover called 2 yuan ...

The man was very happy to buy a parrot, but it suddenly occurred to him: I spent so much money to buy this parrot. If it can't talk, won't I lose a lot?

So he went to ask the boss, "Boss ... can you talk?"

Then he heard the parrot shout, "Can't you talk?" ! ? ! Who do you think was bidding you just now? ! ?

A man kept a parrot, which was very powerful, and all the other birds in it were killed by it.

Later, the owner brought back an eagle and put it together. When the owner came to see it, the parrot's hair hung outside the cage.

The host said, "Not this time. "

But on closer inspection, the eagle died, and the parrot said naked," This grandson is really amazing. You really can't beat ya without taking off your arms. "

A bird dealer has three parrots. A customer came and looked at it, pointing to the first parrot and asking for the price.

"1 yuan. "The bird dealer said.

The customer said in surprise, "So expensive? "

" Of course, because it can use Windows"

".What about this one? "The customer pointed to the second one.

"2, because it can use UNIX"

"Oh, where's the third one? "

"3。 Will it ...? "The bird dealer shrugged his shoulders and replied," I don't know what it will be. "He pointed to the first two parrots," but they both called it' CTO'. "

A man was walking down the street and saw a businessman selling parrots. Seeing that parrots were beautiful, he asked the businessman if parrots could talk.

The businessman said, "Of course! Don't believe it. You hold its right foot. "

The man held the parrot's right foot according to the words. Only the parrot said clearly," Hello! Hello! "

The man was very happy, and the businessman said," You hold his left foot again. "

The man shook the parrot's left foot again, only to hear the parrot say clearly:" Goodbye, goodbye ... "

The man was even happier. He immediately bought the parrot.

After returning home, be in heaven touched the parrot's left foot and his right foot for a while.

The parrot also obediently said: Goodbye. Hello. <

as soon as he grasped the parrot's feet.

Only the parrot said loudly, "xxxx! You want to throw me to death! ?

-------------------one day.

I saw a piece of paper stuck outside the cage, which said,

"I'm not sick"

"My feet are not hurt"

"I'm not dead"

"I like lying like this",

So I thought this parrot was full of personality, so I bought it home ...

I taught this parrot to talk every day for the next week ... This angered me, so I threw it into the chicken cage to vent my anger ... When I went to see it the next day, I saw a parrot holding a chicken and saying "Call Dad" and "Call Dad" ...

Little X went to the bird market again. Found a parrot with a price tag of 3 yuan money.

So he asked the seller: Why is your parrot so cheap?

seller: my parrot is stupid! Shit, I've been teaching it for a long time. Up to now, I can only say one sentence-"Who is it?"

Xiao X thought it was cheap anyway, so he bought it.

when he got home in the evening, he thought, "I won't believe in religion or you!" So little X taught it to say something else all night.

But in the morning, the parrot just said, "Who is it?" So little X got angry and locked the door and went to work.

after a while, a gas bill checker (Z for short) came.

Little Z, "Knock, Knock ..." (Knock on the door)

Parrot: Who is it?

little z: gas inspector.

parrot: who is it?

little z: gas inspector.

parrot: who is it?

little z: gas inspector.

in the evening, Xiao X came back. I saw a man lying on the ground at the door of my house, foaming at the mouth.

little x: yo ~! Who is this?

I heard someone checking the gas in the room.

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