Humorous sentences that make people laugh (63 selected sentences)

1, don't call me if you have nothing to do, and don't call me if you have anything to do.

I may not be able to lift a hundred Jin of stones, but if it's a hundred Jin of money, I promise to pick it up and run.

Never quarrel with your parents, because you will only be scolded if you win, and you will only be beaten if you win.

I don't want affection and justice. I just want to have money with you. Of course, if I have money, I can live without you.

I remember when I first entered middle school, I found that my chest bulged slightly, and I felt so scared. Now that I have graduated from college, I am even more afraid to look at my slightly bulging chest.

6. You must have been a carbonated drink in your last life, so I am in bliss when I see you.

7. I am willing to bow down, kneel under your throne and kiss your skirts and shoes; Even if not, then my dear, I will kiss the dirt and dust you stepped on.

8, you stand there and don't move, I ran over!

9. If you can't be amazing, it's ugly.

/Mr 10/0, I can be your future wife.

1 1. It's raining in your city. I wonder if you have an umbrella. If not, I hope it will rain harder.

In order to soar in the ocean of knowledge, I get up in the middle of the night and turn on the tap in the library.

13, I was afraid of the dark since I was a child and didn't study well because I didn't dare to look at the blackboard.

14. I knew it was so difficult to find a boyfriend, so I decided to kiss the doll.

15, I am small-minded, but I don't lack it. I have a good temper, but I don't!

16, making money like a needle digging the ground, spending money like water seeping into the soil.

17, stop me if you want to fall in love.

18, it's inconvenient to go out in such a strong wind. If it blows into someone else's arms, I am so cute that others will definitely not return it.

19, you have the right to match me, and I have the strength to kill you.

I found myself paralyzed. I tried to tell myself that I had to go to work today, but my body just didn't respond.

2 1, I can't pretend to be reserved Ladies are not my way, so I am destined to be a bitch.

22. After the Chinese exam, I cried. After the math exam, I found myself crying early.

23. I skipped classes too much. I wanted to go to class yesterday. Seeing the teacher, the teacher said with surprise: I haven't seen you for so long, and I have grown so big.

24. Do you want to make a mistake and regret it for life? Here comes the opportunity.

I'm not bragging, but with my education and diploma, I will definitely sweep the streets of this city in the future.

26, we are all adults, there is no need to bicker, just die of old age.

27, summer vacation jun, you see how much my dad likes you and counts down for you every day.

28. Even if a beautiful person makes a mistake, others can easily forgive him. Ugly people can't be forgiven by others because of their looks, let alone make mistakes.

29. Conquering the world is not great. A man who can conquer himself is the greatest man in the world.

30.do you love me? If you love me, put on a white wedding dress and peel it off with your crazy hands.

3 1. Some people say I am handsome. I've been thinking all night. Who leaked the news?

32. From primary school to university, the only constant is a heart that doesn't want to learn.

33. I skipped classes too much. I wanted to go to class yesterday. Seeing the teacher, the teacher was surprised and said, I haven't seen you for so long, and I have grown so big.

When I met you, I realized that dinosaurs could actually reappear.

35. After the English listening test, I understood a truth: some words are only for people who understand.

36, you are the wind, I am the sand, lingering into a sandstorm.

37. When you feel poor. Don't lose heart, at least you know yourself.

I suggest you go to bed as early as possible, do more exercise, don't eat supper, don't smoke or drink, go to bed early and get up early, and form good habits. Over time, you have no friends.

39. The boss fell asleep in the rocking chair, and the proprietress gave him a leg. I feel so loving for a moment. I couldn't bear to disturb them, so I gently took two cans of Wang Zi and left.

40. Fallen is not terrible. What is terrible is that when a person falls, he is sober!

4 1. As an experienced person, my advice to young people is: Don't come over.

I have raised myself so well that I don't want to take advantage of anyone. I have bread. Why should I find someone who can't afford my love and wants to share my bread?

43. You two seem to be a good match, and Yue Lao's garbage sorting is in place.

Honey, be nice to me, or I won't give birth to your son.

45. Don't look for me if you have nothing to do, and don't look for me if you have anything to do.

Either I changed my appearance or you forgot the time.

47. The furthest distance in the world is your home in Australia, and I cook porridge at home.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman who has nothing to do but eat.

49. Showing off your wealth is like being complacent, trying to show off your gorgeous appearance, but being seen by someone else's ass.

50. Since people get tanned, their faces look good, their teeth turn white, and they don't blush after drinking.

5 1, don't ask me about it, it's not like you don't have my Alipay.

52. After studying for so many years, now that I think about it, kindergarten is the best place to mix.

53. Although I have no books, notes, classes or review, I have a heart that I don't want to fail.

There must be a hole next to the mouse when it laughs at the cat.

55. Life is like an angry bird. There are always a few pigs laughing when they fail.

I never thought I would care so much about you, no matter whether our ending is perfect or not.

57. I miss you at work and am full of enthusiasm; I miss you at rest, gentle and sweet; I miss you when I succeed, full of enthusiasm; Miss you when you are frustrated and increase your motivation. Honey, I miss you!

As the saying goes, Rome wasn't built in a day!

59. Format yourself just to delete you.

60. Flowers and trees in the sun can easily turn into spring. I heard you like Kun.

6 1, staying up late is really harmful to my health, so I will order a snack every night to make up for it.

62. The strength of science is that you can't read the answers even if you copy them. The advantage of liberal arts is that you don't want to copy after reading the answers.

63. When you are poor, you think you will be happy if you have money. When you are really rich, you find that there is more money than happiness. This is simply happiness.