Kneel for a riddle or joke about Germany

2. Evergreen (German city) Berlin

3. I like geography because I found the similarities between Einstein, a national of five Central Asian countries (playing a German celebrity) (the names of five Central Asian countries all carry the word Stan).

Joke:

1. When I first came to Germany, I didn't know German or even numbers. When I got to the mall, I was nervous. I don't understand the numbers told by the cashier, I don't know how to look at the cashier screen, and I'm afraid others will laugh. Every time I give the cashier a big ticket, people give me a lot of steel collapses, so I always have a lot of steel collapses that I can never spend.

2. I began to take a language class. I just started eating in Mensa (university canteen), where I contracted packages for freshmen: one for girls and one for boys. Boys have beer or something, and I'm a girl. I took some notebooks, paper towels and a small bag, which looked like candy. When I touched it with my hand, it was slippery. I was curious and opened it: then a red thing slipped to the ground, which turned out to be TT.

By the way, there is another one: gg and I invited a dinner party at home, and a large number of people came. Some guests smoked, so I sent a little boy who had just arrived in Germany to the vending machine below to buy two packs of cigarettes and gave him enough change. He came back and put the cigarette in my hand. He asked me inexplicably: Why are German cigarette cases so small? As soon as I saw it, he bought me two boxes of Tao Tao.

4. The first time I went to the supermarket here to buy food, I went to aldi (the name of a German supermarket chain). When I paid, I drew a 500 (the largest face value of the euro, my brother has not seen it for a long time ...) directly from my wallet. As a result, the cashier kept muttering to the seniors around him and quickly put it away.

I just came to Germany and thought that what was on the packaging shell was the actual thing.

I thought it was instant coffee, but I bought filter paper.

I thought it was a cake with flour in it.

Once I took a train and chatted with a handsome German guy. Then he said that he went to see his girlfriend and brought a bunch of gifts. Then there is a box of TT in it. At first, I didn't think it was that thing. I forgot whether I asked him or he asked me. I don't know. As a result, he immediately became a full member, saying that I didn't even know this. He asked me how old I was and took out my wallet and a loose one inside to educate me. Oh, my God, it's on the train. I really hope I can find a crack in the ground. ...

6. I still want to laugh when I think about it. The next day I went to a German supermarket and bought Kuechenpapier as WCpapier. I thought, does German pp need that big paper?

The paper used by p.s. Kuechenpapier to wipe hands or things in the kitchen is relatively large. WCpapier is toilet paper, which is used to go to the toilet.

7. Just learning German, I didn't know that Freund meant boyfriend, but I thought it meant ordinary friend just like English. When I went to see a doctor, the doctor chatted kindly about the situation at home and asked if there was Freund's. I said there are many. Then her face changed.

8. I always see a picture on the road, with a little swallow and Knaus written on it. Actually, this is a company LOGO. At that time, I thought Knaus was a swallow. I thought I had learned a new word until one day I talked about swallows. ...

10. When I first went abroad (in Sweden), I liked strong milk. I bought milk in a small carton (with 40% on it) in the supermarket, put it in a cup and heated it in a microwave oven, and another layer of oil came out. Now I tell my Swedish neighbors that this is the milk I drank when I was a child! Then he drank it. He looked at me for a while and said, what milk did you buy? I showed him the paper box, and he smiled: You are fat! This is condensed milk!

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13. I just arrived in Germany a few days ago and I don't have a student ID card. Before getting on the bus, I recited the name of the station I was going to, for fear that I might make a mistake. When I got on the bus, I spoke the name of the station fluently, even though I was nervous. At this time, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then the driver told me the price, and my hearing was not very good (I guess everyone came). I heard it was. MS I gave more, and he mumbled for a long time, but I didn't understand, so I went straight to my seat. It suddenly occurred to me that he hadn't given me a ticket or change, and then I went to him with confidence. Because my German is poor, I asked him in English why he didn't give me a ticket or change. Fortunately, the driver took a look at me (fortunately, he can speak simple English) and said that I didn't have enough money.

14. This is my first time to come to Germany and the first time to go abroad in my life. I am lucky to travel around the world on business, so I am very excited. Staying in a hotel, I want to find someone to make tea with boiling water. Where can I find hot water? The man answered while taking a bath.

15. Someone stepped on my foot in the car. I even said "dank, dank" loudly when I was excited (thank you). The old lady looked at me in dismay. I still took the bus, and my mobile phone was in my bag. There was a phone call, but I didn't hear it. Someone asked me if I wanted to borrow my mobile phone. I don't understand. I thought I was asked to borrow my mobile phone. When I get excited, I sign to say "no, no". After the man got off the bus, I found my mobile phone calling at home. I went to HM to buy clothes, picked out a beautiful black dress that I thought was good, and stood in line at the door of the fitting room. All the mm looked at me curiously. After I tried it, I took it back to the original shelf and issued the words "schwangekleidung" (maternity dress). Students went to buy vegetables, thinking that a cabbage was sold by themselves, so they chose the largest one. As a result, they paid money to go home and cried and ate Chinese cabbage for two weeks. I think so much for the time being, but there should still be some. I just had a terrible nightmare and woke up feeling much better.

16. I'll contribute another one, either just coming to Germany or it happened a while ago.

Our company's telephone screen is very small, the phone number can be seen on the outside line and the caller's name can be seen on the inside line. I usually say my name before answering the phone. I don't know why I lost my mind that day. I saw a man named Grunert calling. I picked up the phone and opened my mouth: Grunert. Grunert, who called, stayed there for a long time and didn't know what to say. I guess people are still weird. Why is this man also called Grunert?

17. When I first came to Germany, bf and his friends went to the supermarket to buy beer. After listening to it, I opened it and drank it and threw up. They are all bought as soda water. ...

18. It's also an embarrassing thing when I just arrived in Germany.

A friend came back to China and never came back. So many things were thrown at me. Once gg came to me, I gave him a self-made cream made by rossmann (the name of the chain store) and asked him to use it back. A few days later, he asked me very depressed: Are you sure you gave me a cream? I used a lot of bags. I also plausibly said: it says milch, which is used to draw faces. It must be because of your poor skin. After a few days, he finally growled on the phone: What you gave me was facial cleanser! Renegonsmirche

In addition, I just came to Germany and heard that German mm wears Tintin. I was embarrassed to go to the supermarket and took one when no one was looking. I went home and tried it excitedly. I feel it should be the same as domestic underwear, with the big one at the back. Strangely enough, Mao Mao was exposed. I didn't know it was the other way around until I asked my classmates. ...

19. Before I came to Germany, I chatted with a German online friend. I said that I am now in college and will go to Germany to study after graduation. He asked me if I lived with my parents, and I said I didn't live with my classmates. Forgot to add plural, and wrote a freundin (girlfriend, female friend) directly. Then he asked me, what will your friends do when you go to Germany? I'm sure she will. I'm puzzled. What's so sad about this? After graduation, they prepared for work, only to find out later that he regarded me as gay.

20. I once participated in a sportkurs (physical education class), and I just found the venue after attending a kurs (class, training course). They are all old people, so they always change their clothes before exercising. They pushed open the dressing room. Wow, it's all white PP, which was not so vivid before. I blushed. It turns out that they Germans don't seem to mind men and women.

2 1. Once I went to Cologne by train and wanted to go to the toilet on the way. When I stood in front of the toilet, I pressed the button and the door slowly opened. As a result, an uncle was using it and looked at me with disgust. I mean, I'm sorry, but I didn't say anything. I turned my head and slipped away. There were quite a few people in the car at that time. Now I don't understand why the door is open.

22. By the way, there is another one who just came to Germany and didn't dare to press the stop button on the bus. He thought it was an emergency brake when he pressed the car. As a result, I arrived at the station where I wanted to get off, and the bus didn't stop. I don't understand. I'm angry. As a result, my kind grandmother told me that before you got off the bus, the driver didn't know that someone was getting off the bus until you pressed this button. Another one belongs to a friend. When he first came to Germany, he didn't know that the door of his car had to press the button outside, so he stopped there, walked to the door and waited for it to open. As a result, he stood for a while without opening the door, and the car left. He was very depressed. When the next bus came, he saw a man coming from behind and pressed the button there. When the door opened, he realized that he had to press the button. ...

It was also the first time that he came to Germany. Once when he was doing SBAHN, when the car stopped to get off, the door wouldn't open. Finally, someone opened a small mouth, and a man was sticking his head out to get off. My husband saw the ZU button next to him and thought, Isn't there an open button? At that time, he was a little confused about Zuhe. He just clicked it, and ...

P.s.zu off, auf on.

24. I used to go to Dusit. When I saw a car passing a street with einbahnstrasse written on it, I excitedly told my friends nearby: "Dig ~ ~ There is also a street called einbahnstrasse near my home. What a coincidence! " Then my friend also said: Really, alas, there are several street names in Germany that seem to be found in every city. For example, another friend next to me said stupidly: Please have some common sense. einbahnstrasse means one-way street. Which city has no one-way street ~ ~ ~

25. When I first came to Germany, I was very nervous when talking to Germans. Once I met one thing, and after the handsome guy repeated it n times, I finally understood that it was TT, and it was easy to say "Wolfer". At that time, he looked at me a little helplessly. ...

I went to the supermarket to buy things, and I saw a little thing of 0.09 Euro in butter. I'm glad to buy it home and spread it on bread. Sour and disgusting. I looked up the word and it turned out to be hefe (yeast) ...

My friend came home from work, very tired, fell asleep on the tram, opened his eyes and found himself in strassenbahn's garage. ...

26. In Chinese class, the teacher asked everyone to tell a story, so I chose a simple tadpole to find my mother, but what did the tadpole say? I went to the blackboard and drew a lot of dots with small tails! Then I saw many classmates and teachers laughing there. It turns out that they are all wrong!

Still in language class, every Monday, the teacher will let us know how Rosso spent the weekend. We heard a foreign MM say loudly that I had sex.

27. When we first came to Germany, we went to the supermarket to buy toiletries. A friend chose a tube like China toothpaste. When we use it at home, it tastes strange and doesn't bubble. Look it up in the dictionary. It's beriberi cream. ...

Add one of my friends', or Easter. She said she wanted to draw eggs as a gift, but she bought 10 eggs to make at home. The technology is not good. First, she broke four eggs and ate them. As a result, the rest was cooked. She ate boiled eggs for two days and never drew eggs again.

In the carriage of a moving train, there is a German officer, a beautiful woman, a Jew and an old woman. Later, the train entered the tunnel and the carriage was opaque. Suddenly there was a kiss, and then a loud slap. When the train pulled out of the tunnel, I saw a palm print on the face of the German officer. The old woman thought, this German is shameless! Kiss that little girl. The beauty thought: Did the German officer kiss the old woman? There must be something wrong with his aesthetic level. The German officer thought, What did I do wrong just now? Who hit me? Only Jews snickered: Great! I kissed the back of my hand first, and then slapped the German hard. This is a trap to get rid of hatred. Ha ha laugh .......