Looking for super funny short jokes

1. My wife went to study abroad. Due to her busy schedule, she wrote less letters. She called home that day and asked her husband how she was doing, and finally asked: "Dear, what's wrong with my cute kitten?" "

"Dead!"

"Oh my god, this is terrible news! Why didn't you tell me this sad news in a gentle way? The kitten climbed up a big tree to catch birds, accidentally slipped down, and went to heaven. Do you understand? "

"Dear, I understand. Is there any news from home? Is my mother getting better? "

"She also climbed a big tree..."

2. The father of a soldier in the army died. After the news came, the company was training. The company commander called the soldiers out and said: "Hey, your father is dead."

After the political commissar found out about this, he said to the company commander: "You can tell me later. Be gentle, otherwise the blow will be too great and others will not be able to bear it. "

Later on another occasion, a soldier's mother died. When the company commander found out, he said to the lined up team: "Mom is still alive. Take one step forward." Then he pointed at the soldier and said, "Stand where you are."

3. Chu Yang was assigned to a certain hospital after graduating from medical school. On his first day at work, the attending physician said to him:

"Patient XX in Ward 116 has advanced liver cancer. He can only live for six months. Go to the ward and tell him about his condition."

With the excitement of going to work for the first time, Chu Yang ran to the ward and announced loudly: "Patient XX, you can only live for six months!" The patient could not accept the blow and died of fright on the spot.

Afterwards, the attending physician severely criticized Chu Yangxiang and taught him: "As doctors, we cannot shout so loudly, especially we cannot tell the truth directly to the patient. XXX from Ward 114 The patient can only live for one month. Please inform me again and remember my words!"

This time, Chu Yangxiang walked into the ward with a smile and whispered to patient XXX's ear! : "Guess who will die this month?