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Happy event, positive energy joke, inspirational.

Happy event, positive energy joke, inspirational.

Happy event's positive energy jokes are inspirational, and we all want to live happily every day. Happiness is very important to our physical and mental health. Let's take a look at the sentences about positive energy jokes and the inspirational articles I collected about positive energy jokes.

Happy event positive energy jokes inspirational 1

1. The teacher asked Xiaoming, "There is a pit five meters deep in front of you, and there is no water in it. How do you get out when you jump in? " Xiao Ming: "It's not easy. If you let water come out of your head, it will float. " Teacher: "Is there so much water in your head?" Little Ming Dow: "I don't have that much water in my head. Why do I jump?" Tang Sanzang: "Bajie, run two steps to show the teacher". Pig Bajie: "Master, why do you suddenly want to see your apprentice run away?" Tang Sanzang: "Oh, what a shame! I have been a teacher in a temple since I was a child, and I have never eaten pork. I want to watch the pigs run.

3. A daughter-in-law accidentally fell to the ground while playing with her husband's mobile phone. The phone case and battery fell out, and 200 yuan was hidden inside. The daughter-in-law looked at her husband and said, explain! The husband said in panic, Oh, my God! I fell so hard that I lost my phone bill.

Daughter-in-law: Can you drop my mobile phone and see if you can drop the phone bill? The husband grabbed his daughter-in-law's mobile phone and threw it on the bed. A man crawled out from under the bed. Husband said it was a mess? The daughter-in-law said in a panic: Look at you, your new friend just fell out.

4. Daughter-in-law bought a dog, so she gave money to let the dog smell it. The husband felt very strange and asked, "Wife, what are you doing? Let the dog pick up money for you on the road?" The daughter-in-law smiled mysteriously: "You will know later!" A few weeks later, my husband's private money disappeared.

Wukong and Tang Priest went to the hall together. If you are the one, Wukong came to the stage and all 24 lights went out. Reason: 1. No house, no car, just a broken stick. 2. Occupational hazards of bodyguards. 3. Always hitting fairies, not being gentle with girls. 4. Being trapped in prison and being pressed under Wuzhishan for 500 years. Tang Priest came on stage, wow! The lights are all on. Reason: 1. Civil servants; 2. Brother Huang, backstage is the hardest. 3. Proficient in Sanskrit and other foreign languages. 4. Very handsome. 5. The most crucial point: BMW!

6. I took a taxi in the morning and didn't bring the fare when I arrived at my destination. I was embarrassed. I only brought two packs of Chinese, so I took them out as fares. The master took my cigarette and said, "Such a good cigarette." I'm embarrassed to get off. The master suddenly stopped me and took out a pack of red river from his trouser pocket and handed it to me. He said quietly, "Change ..."

7. Shopping with the boudoir./kloc-Lu Yu, about 0/4 years old, came over with a runny nose and tears and asked, Auntie, have you seen my mother? I lost her. She wears high heels, has long hair and has a little fat man. ...

8. When a woman's wife came home, they screamed as soon as they met: "Husband, I met a thief on the bus. As soon as I passed by, I found that my mobile phone was gone, and I wanted to run when I got off the bus. I chased out of a station and caught a sharp wound. The boy refused to admit it. I looked everywhere, but I couldn't find my Nokia. The thief begged me to say, elder sister, just pick one. I brought an apple 5 back. " Me: Wife, you forgot your mobile phone when you went out, and your Nokia is in bed.

9. When I saw a handsome guy across the train, I never got a chance to strike up a conversation. I'm anxious. Late at night, the handsome boy took a nap and fell asleep there. Suddenly, the train shook violently, and the handsome boy's head knocked over his leftover instant noodle bowl on the dining table, with soup all over his face. I burst out laughing. Look at the handsome guy's eyes again, I know I don't need to strike up a conversation today! ! !

10, sick child: "Why should I wipe the cotton ball before the injection?" Father: "That's alcohol. Get your ass drunk first, and then the injection won't hurt. " Sick child: "but I still hurt!" " Father: "that's because your ass can drink a lot!" "

Happy event positive energy joke inspirational 2 1, so happy together.

College roommates have liked a girl for a long time and decided to confess.

When the goddess is out of class, walk with her on campus.

A sprinkler came by, just as the sprinkler passed by them.

He suddenly picked up the goddess, probably too excited and slipped.

But the ending is still happy, and they are together.

2. Oppose tying.

Woman: I have one more condition to marry you.

Man: Honey, you told me that I would promise anything as long as I could marry you.

W: This condition is very simple. I want to take my mother with me because she only has one daughter. Man: Well ... Woman: What, you don't agree? M: Don't you know that shops are against tying now? !

3. Kill first and then rape

It is said that one day, when a policeman was patrolling, he passed an alley and suddenly heard a conversation?

A: "What should I do about this?"

B: "Let's kill her first, and then rape her."

At that moment, the policeman pulled out his gun and rushed in, only to find two people standing in the kitchen with a fish in their hands. ...

4. How do you like jiaozi?

Find clothes to wear in the morning, get ready for work, and put on a long-lost skirt.

Say to yourself in the mirror: "alas! How like jiaozi! "

The husband who washed his face said, "This is the problem of stuffing!" It's not the leaves. "

5, not worse than 500 points.

I went to an interview today, and my boss asked me to talk about my school days.

Think of the news that rural students can get up to 65 points in Tsinghua.

I said, "I was very angry when I saw this new enrollment plan. If I had this policy, my college entrance examination score would not be more than 500 points worse than that of Tsinghua! "

Happy event positive energy jokes inspirational 3 1. The three most difficult things in life: keeping secrets, forgetting the trauma and making full use of leisure time.

2. The two most difficult things in the world: one is to put your own thoughts into other people's heads, and the other is to put other people's money into your own pockets.

3. You are dressed like this. Are you dissatisfied with the world?

4. Construction engineering and marriage and love: marriage is bidding, love is negotiation, the woman's parents are the owners, the man's parents are the contractors, the witness is the supervisor, the marriage certificate is the contract, and marriage is the groundbreaking ceremony.

The history teacher said that the order of the Qin Dynasty to unify the six countries could be recorded as "calling Zhao Wei to move".

If you want to have free time, don't waste it.

7. Rain says that the sky will shed tears, coffee says that life should be used to bitterness, and I say that living is simply suffering.

8, the mood can be attributed to calm, but not tend to die.

9. The biggest enemy in life is yourself; The biggest failure is arrogance; The greatest stupidity is self-deception.

10, if you want what others can't get, you have to pay what others don't pay.

1 1. If you really love each other, how can you be willing to part?

12, I am scolded by you if there is a tacit understanding; There is a kind of harmony, let me sit and you stand; There is a friendship that tells me to eat meat and you drink soup; There is a blessing that texting makes you happy.

13, I bought an inch monitor to make my mistakes look smaller!

14, a wedding song for myself, someone to accompany me to get up, someone to wash my clothes, someone to clear my desk and chair, someone to accompany me to go shopping and spend money, you have to do it, come and throw a red line, I will find you in the crowd, remember if you are the one!

15, the most annoying thing is that you can do whatever you want and be free.