Three jokes

Making fun of the teacher: (1) In math class, a boy was picking his nose. The teacher said, "xx, stop digging. There are more and more such things. "

(2) Chinese teacher: I killed pigs in my last life, taught in this life, killed people in my last life, and taught Chinese in this life.

(3) teach you that I will live at least five years less. If my annual salary is 0.2 million/200 thousand, it will be 6.5438+0 million in five years, dear! In the future, you can publish a book called How We Murdered a Millionaire.

(4) There is a saying that "Huashan has been a road since ancient times." Going up the mountain is this way, going down the mountain is this way, and if there is any other way, it is free fall.

(5) All right, everybody, laugh quickly. I want to keep talking. By the way, I want to remind some students that although the teacher speaks very well, you must not be reluctant to upgrade. As far as I know, some students in this class have listened to my class for three years and are still in Grade One. Do you want to sign? If you want to, just say so. ...

(6) The geography teacher asked: Where does the river flow? A student suddenly stood up and sang: The river flows eastward. The teacher ignored him and then asked, How many stars are there in the sky? Students sing: The stars in the sky join Beidou. The teacher was out of breath: get out. The student said, let's go. The teacher is very helpless: you are sick. Student: You have everything. Teacher: You are singing a quiz. Student: The road is rugged. Teacher: You shout.

A friend's child went to primary school, and the teacher asked him to draw. The first three pictures show that the pig got lost and the mother pig found it. Let's draw the fourth picture. According to our idea, children must draw a picture of mother pig and pig living happily together. Little did he know that the children drew a bonfire with two roast pigs, one big and one small.

On the way to school with several classmates, classmate A accidentally stepped on a horse gourd cover and turned it over. Fortunately, we caught him in time, but his feet were still soaked in the poop in the horse gourd ... After I got him up, I observed the horse gourd cover, which was near my home, and it was okay to walk on it often. I tried to step on it with one foot, but it didn't turn over and I stepped on both feet. I said curiously to my classmates who were cleaning up the poop on their feet, "You don't know how it grows. You won't turn it over until I get up. " Then I jumped twice, and the lid of the horse gourd suddenly turned over … because other students were cleaning A's shoes, and no one came to catch me …

When I was in junior high school, I lived on campus and the management was strict. Some students can't bear loneliness, and secretly go to Internet cafes to play at night. Because the gate was closed, he had to jump off the wall, so the classmate jumped out of the toilet. I didn't expect the take-off force to be small, so I jumped directly into the cesspit. After two o'clock in the middle of the night, I walked twenty miles and went home.

Have fun! O(∩_∩)O~ (well ~ more than three ~)