Joke Collection Website - Joke collection - Children's jokes hurt your stomach

Children's jokes hurt your stomach

Children's jokes will make you laugh.

When listening to other people's jokes, I feel funny and cold, but when I watch them, I laugh too hard. Have you ever had such an experience? The following children's jokes hurt your stomach, hoping to make you laugh.

Children laugh at your stomach 1

1. I named my son to express my thoughts on him? Excellence? . For seven years, there is nothing wrong with this name. I watched TV the night before yesterday, and there was an advertisement on TV. What is the advertising word? Challenge the limits and pursue Excellence? . My son suddenly asked me, Dad, why do they want to pursue me?

Children get together and everyone performs.

One of the children is excellent and plays the piano on the stage. After the performance, the parents who watched the performance kept shouting for her to play another one.

The teacher asked her if she wanted to play another song. As a result, the child cried. I didn't play wrong. Why should I play it again?

My 3-year-old and 7-year-old sons came into the room and proudly showed me a crawling caterpillar in his hand. I was scared at the sight of bugs, but I couldn't let my son see them, so I said in a relaxed tone. Take it outside quickly. Its mother must be looking for it. ?

The son turned and walked out. I thought I had achieved my goal. But who knows that he will come back soon, with two caterpillars crawling on his hands: Mom, I also brought his mother! ?

My son just entered the first grade, and one day he forgot to bring his pencil case. His anxious mother specially sent it to him in class. The teacher touched his son's head and whispered, Say goodbye to his mother. ?

Immediately, dozens of students in the class shouted in unison:? Bye, mom! ?

5. dad:? Don't move your feet while eating. ?

Son:? How did you see my feet under the table? Is it because of the long feet? corn

My 6-or 3-year-old daughter said she could make sentences, so I let her use them? Young? Make a sentence, she immediately made a sentence: mother lost weight, and lost a lot of pounds when she was young. ?

Children's jokes burst into laughter 2

Laugh, the child will go far in the future.

A couple gave birth to a little boy after failing to use contraception. When the baby was born, he clenched his fist and kept laughing.

The nurse broke his fist. She found a handful of birth control pills in it, and then the little boy spoke. You two want to kill me, it's not that easy, hahahaha. ...

Three jokes for the best children

1. Dad asked his son: If the car is made of chocolate, which part would you like to eat first?

Son:? Wheels, so the car won't move. ?

There is a six-year-old daughter at home. One day, my mother and I quarreled and turned to my grandparents and shouted: Look at you two, how can you find a daughter-in-law for your son and bully me all day! ! !

Dad took his family to his grandmother's house hundreds of kilometers away, especially telling his 4-year-old daughter not to ask on the way? How long will it take to arrive? Questions like that?

After driving for an hour, the little daughter asked her father? By the time we get to grandma's house, will I be 5 years old?

Young adults, speaking more domineering than adults.

1, quarreling with my wife at night, my daughter who is watching Journey to the West can't bear to turn her head and say: If you two really can't do it, then break up and share the luggage! I am bored to death! ?

Today, the female colleague of the company brought his four or five-year-old son to the company. Everyone asked him: Is it better for his father or his mother?

The children whispered: Hello, Dad!

Everyone continued to tease him and asked why?

The child looked at his mother and shouted because he married a good wife and gave birth to a good son. . . .

Children do arithmetic, which makes them laugh.

Teacher: If I give you two rabbits, Billy gives you two rabbits and Mary gives you two rabbits, how many rabbits do you have in the end?

Tom: Seven.

Teacher: No, say it again. Listen carefully this time. I gave you two rabbits, Billy gave you two rabbits, Mary gave you two rabbits, and how many rabbits did you have in the end?

Tom: Seven.

Teacher: That's still wrong. Let me put it another way. If I give you two pigeons, Billy gives you two pigeons, Mary gives you two pigeons, and how many pigeons do you have in the end?

Tom: Six.

Teacher: OK! Now let's go back to the question just now: If I give you two rabbits, Billy gives you two rabbits and Mary gives you two rabbits, how many rabbits do you have in the end?

Tom: Seven.

Teacher: What's the matter with you? Aren't rabbits and pigeons the same?

Tom: No, I already have a rabbit at home.

Children's words are unscrupulous, and small basin friends extrapolate.

Once, my son asked me: Why can whales grow so big and grass carp grow so small?

I explained:? Because whales live in the sea and grass carp live in fish ponds, the sea is much bigger than fish ponds. Of course, whales grow much bigger than grass carp. ?

Later, my son took me and begged: Dad, let's buy a big house, so I won't grow taller all the time. ?

Light candles and watch TV.

The teacher checked her homework in class until Xiaoming.

Xiao Ming said? Teacher, there was a power failure in my house last night. ?

The teacher asked? What did you do all night?

? Watch TV! ?

? Isn't there a power outage in your house?

? No, that's right. Xiao Ming panicked and said, I watched it by lighting a candle! ! ?

;