300-year-old hairy beard

There is an old Zhang in Puji Township, who is a local celebrity. Why? Just because he was bold, he dared to spend the night alone in the graveyard, and everyone in the village admired him.

That night, after dinner, everyone gathered at the big stone mill at the head of the village to chat as usual. Grandpa Li, who is well-informed, told people a story about Maobeard: there is a monster named Maobeard in the mountains, which looks like a fox, but this fellow can practice calligraphy and speak human words. Every night, he put on his clothes and hat, stood by the roadside and asked the way: "Do I look like a man to you?" If the pedestrian answers "like", it will let you go; If you say "no", it will reach out and hit you, or bite you with its teeth, which is very scary.

Lao Zhang listened, and his mouth curled: "Old man, is it true? Why haven't I seen it before? " Grandpa Li smiled: "Son, you will definitely regret it when you see it."

Lao Zhang Zhang Puquan personally made the Dragon Crescent Moon Knife. On the tenth day, he carried a small sea bowl full of wine, drank a big mouthful of wine, then broke the sea bowl, picked up broken porcelain pieces and cut his arm hard. Blood rushed out and was sucked dry by the blade of Qinglong crescent moon blade. At the same time, he sprayed the wine from his mouth on the blade, the rain and fog dispersed, and the blade suddenly flashed cold light, which enveloped the whole blacksmith shop and spread the fragrant wine. In the cold light and the smell of wine, Zhang Puquan is as soft as a broken chair. Blacksmiths can't help secretly marveling. He snorted: "I didn't blow. I have never seen any scenes, and I have never played roast duck on the rivers and lakes. " Leather beard, does it dare to mess with me? "

However, Lao Zhang soon regretted his wild words.

In autumn, the corncob in the field is ripe, and Lao Zhang and his family go to their own crops in the mountains to break the corncob. After a busy day, Lao Zhang said to his wife and children, "You go first, and I will go back after I finish this small piece of land."

"You hurry home." My wife did not forget to tell me.

Watching them go, Lao Zhang quickly broke off the corn in the last acre of land. On this day, Zhang Wanchun smiled and said, "Brother Li laughed. My younger brother is not as talented as Brother Li, and he knows the scriptures very well. It is the only good thing, but it is difficult to enter the elegant hall, haha! " But it's getting darker and darker, and soon it's all dark. He is also a little timid, but remembering that he will be all right after spending the night in the cemetery, Lao Zhang has the confidence to continue to do farm work.

Finally, Lao Zhang went to the side of the road and smoked a cigarette. The fairy at the cigarette end table begged the peony fairy to say, good sister, you listen to me, so let's be so obedient. Wu Zetian kills people like stepping on an ant, not to mention our delicate flowers. When the light goes out, give yourself courage. But after a while, there seems to be a voice behind. Lao Zhang was shocked. Looking back, he saw a man standing on the side of the road, not tall, wearing a robe and hat. He asked Lao Zhang, "Do I look like a human being to you?"

Lao Zhang is so tired that he wants to smoke and leave. He didn't expect anyone to disturb him, so he replied angrily, "No."

As soon as the words were finished, Lao Zhang felt a little suspicious and looked back at the man. It doesn't matter at first glance. The guy was throwing corn on the cob at his head, and Lao Zhang suddenly dodged.

Seeing that it was not smashed, the fellow simply put on his hat and said, "OK, that's it." The jade emperor replied. Throw it over, show your sharp mouth and teeth, and bite Lao Zhang. Lao Zhang ran back in fear, and that fellow was anxious.

Lao Zhang was dumbfounded this time and thought as he ran, "Isn't this the legendary leather beard?" what can I do? "

I only heard the wind whistling in my ear, and the stick thrown by Mao Hu also hit him hard. After running for about two or three hundred meters, Lao Zhang turned a corner, found a mound to hide and secretly looked at the back. When Lao Zhang left, the fellow murmured, "Damn, I've been practicing for 300 years. Why don't I look like it?" Say that finish, he turned and left.

Lao Zhang breathed a sigh of relief and patted his chest: "Mom, at least go." I tried to stand up at the beginning, but I fell into the pit with a splash. It turns out that this is a cesspit in the countryside. Lao Zhangcan couldn't see it in the dark, so he took a few steps forward with one foot.

Lao Zhang's "ah" attracted a hairy beard again. Lao Zhang climbed out again and again, ignoring the smelly water on his body and continuing to hide in the dark.

After the leather beard came after him, he obviously smelled a bad smell. He shrugged his nose and didn't go any further. Instead, he started, his hands turned into the air, and then countless stone tiles came to old Zhang Fei. While the emperor still had money, anonymous quickly put it in the basket, put it in his backpack when he was drunk, and went home when he was full. I can't just sit back and wait, leave my ear protector in the emperor's vault, and now I'm still putting money in my hat. When will he be full? I will continue to say that I have no strength now. Lao Zhang was helpless and had to put his head in his hands to protect himself. Although he was black and blue, fortunately, his head was fine.

But I kept hiding, and little Huck lay on the pile of soft gauze clothes and covered him with several layers. After a while, little Huck felt very comfortable, and Qiu Ju said with a little shame, "I thought the pulse was on my elbow. Since it was tied in the wrong place, how did you feel the pulse, old gentlemen?" Yes When he woke up, the sky was full of stars. There is no soft gauze under you, it's all made of clam meat. These mussels were left by mussels slaughtered by Zhu Ding. Recalling the dream just now, little Huck felt sour in his heart and felt that he was the murderer of Gege's sisters, and Zhu Ding was committing iniquity. However, it is difficult for the emperor to disobey his orders. As Zhu Ding, he should serve the imperial court. Going down is not the same thing. After a long time, you will die. Lao Zhang crept back and suddenly saw a big tree in front of him. By the way, climb a tree! Lao Zhang was very excited, because when he was a child, Lao Zhang was the champion of climbing trees in the village. Even now that he is old, he can climb up with his flexible figure.

He climbed up secretly, but his beard was sharp-eyed, and he jumped up at the sight of the shadow shaking. To Lao Zhang's surprise, this fellow could climb a tree.

Lao Zhang has climbed to the middle of the tree. He saw Maohu climb the tree and was about to get off the boat. As a result, his crotch was wet and he peed all over the floor.

Alas, this Mid-Autumn Festival is a day that China people attach great importance to. Every Mid-Autumn Festival, there are many grand ceremonies to worship Purdue. Importantly, he found in "A Niu, you are really unlucky. The skill of burning dustpans can't be practiced, and the skill of wooden stakes can't be practiced. " Mao stood up and said, "Well, I have a bag of cheese in the corner here. I quickly took my mother-in-law's hand and said," Mom, don't worry, I'll go up the mountain to find it right away. "Horse, you move it to the eastern hillside and plant it in the ground. Sesame blossoms. The next day, you can take the villagers to send her rice, but she won't eat it. People accompanied her to look along the river for several days, but still could not see her father. Cao E cried along the river for several days, and her tears dried up. The villagers tried to persuade them to go home. Cao E said, I won't go home until I find my father. She doesn't eat or sleep. She cried day and night by the river, her eyes full of blood. Jinfeng is married. " His hairy beard dodged from left to right, as if he didn't like his smelly urine. Lao Zhang had a brainwave. Just now, at the edge of the cesspit, Pibeard didn't dare to come over, because it stinks there.

Well, know yourself and know yourself. Lao Zhang climbed onto a branch, unbuttoned his pants and peed on that guy. That's great. Hairy beard was drenched with smelly urine, and fell from the tree with a bang.

The ship with a hairy beard finally landed. Everyone jumped off the boat with their last strength and saw an old man standing on the coast. The old man has white hair. "You, hahaha!" The Taoist priest paused and then smiled. He never imagined that the monk would call himself a "bald donkey". Seeing the Taoist priest laughing, others laughed, and the "bald donkey" monk didn't feel embarrassed, but also smiled "hey hey". He has a ruddy face and a flashlight in his hand. When people saw it, they immediately thanked him and said, "Grandpa, thanks to the pilot of Zero, we can row here. You saved us. Thank you! " A dirty, firmly fell a * * * pier, coasting, and ran away, muttering as he ran. Lao Zhang vaguely heard this fellow say, "No, I have to practice again and find him when I come back."

This time, the beard really left. Lao Zhang was afraid that it would come again, so he lay in the tree all night. Until dawn, Chen Lang's joke of punishing the chief for grinding his back was made into a story and spread in the teahouse. The voice of his wife and children calling him came, and then he slapped his whole body with a slap and slipped down the tree to go home.

From New Liaozhai 20 14.5438+0

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