A joke that amuses oneself.

1. I read a lot about the disadvantages of staying up late online. The biggest change for me is that I changed from happy staying up late to fearful staying up late.

I was afraid of the dark since I was a child, and I didn't study well when I was a child because I didn't dare to look at the blackboard.

We used to be husband and wife, now we are mobile phones, one in hand, forever, no phone, no soul.

Some people like your face, some people like your voice, some people like your personality, some people like your life, but I am different. I don't like you.

After many years of marriage, my husband suddenly turned and hugged his wife in the middle of the night and said that this life is too short. The wife was moved to tears after listening to her husband's words. My husband went on to say: I can't even cover my feet.

6. What do you mean, don't hesitate to die? Is to be angry 10 thousand times a day, but still don't give up.

7. I know everything but I don't like it.

8. The wife said, "You are so tired all day, you can't make money and spend money at the same time. You need me to help you spend money."

9. If you have nothing to do, talk to excellent people and see how far you are from others. Only in this way can you crush your confidence and be a waste with peace of mind.

10. On the weekend, my brother and daughter-in-law were cleaning the room, and suddenly they said, Alas! How can a housewife always have endless housework? Dude, I can't help it! You don't want me to marry two ...

1 1. Before, a friend asked me to borrow money for plastic surgery, which was quite successful. I can't recognize who lent me money anymore.

12. Thank you for your patronage every time you buy a drink. One day, I suddenly couldn't write Huizi in the exam, so I opened the drink next to me. At that time, I was crazy. Another bottle!

13. I went from nothing to assets of over 100 million, from family to luxury villas. I didn't rely on others, I came up with it myself, bit by bit!

14. On the road, I met an old man carrying something. I want to go up and help him move. I casually said, "old thing, I'll help you carry it."

15. After you left, I was not sad, but very happy. Otherwise, I have been worried that you have problems with your legs and feet and can't walk.

16. It's not my fault that I can eat, but my stomach is too lonely.

17. It is said that everyone touches the mobile phone on average 150 times a day. I smiled. This is bullshit. Obviously just once, pick it up when you wake up and put it down before going to bed.

18. I'm not fat, but my swelling is caused by my allergy to life.

19. Someone said my photo was ugly, and I smiled. That's because you haven't met me in person. It's ugly!

20. Rome was not built in a day, nor was it built in a day!

2 1. I've never seen anyone thicker than the city wall like you. I am eight feet away from you, and my face is playing here.

I went to practice driving yesterday. The coach told me that there was a puddle in front of me. I don't know what happened to my brain at that time, so I put my hands on the steering wheel and lifted my feet.

23. My friend cried to me that she was often lovelorn because she was too poor. I immediately despaired of this society: poor, why can he have a girlfriend?

24. call the police I'm so cute. I broke the rules.

25. Others worry about how to make money, and I worry about how to spend money. How to spend 200 yuan until next month?

26. nowadays, men are not easy to be. To get into the hall, get out of the kitchen, raise a wife, find a good mother-in-law, and most importantly, teach my mother to swim!

27. Reasons for being single so far: acquaintances are not easy to start, and strangers are not easy to talk.