Please tell some horror jokes to your brother! ! !

I remember a piece of paranormal that my sister told me. .....

My sister has a friend who has a little son who is about three years old. ....

One day, he found his son waving at the window and said, "goodbye, uncle!" " "

My friend disagreed at first. .....

I thought it was my son talking to a passing uncle in the street (because his family's life is very low).

But I feel that his son always says this sentence around dusk.

I ... but I can't see anyone outside the window ... The more my friends think about it, the more scared they are. ....

So I asked my son who to say goodbye to. .....

The son replied, "with uncle!" " "

The friend asked again, "There is no one outside! Which uncle did you tell? "

The son pointed to the outside and answered him:

"Which uncle? . . .

Uncle Sun! "

The second story died of eating instant noodles.

My brother doesn't like my mother's cooking very much, but he likes instant noodles.

One day my mother didn't cook, and my brother wanted to make instant noodles.

My mother scolded him: "You won't go out to buy lunch without your mother cooking, will you?" Eating instant noodles is not nutritious! ! "

My brother said, "I just like eating, so what!" " "

"Alas ... mom told you that instant noodles are really not a good thing. There is a young lady in your father's company.

In order to save money and send it home, she eats instant noodles at noon and night in the morning. She ate instant noodles every day and died three months later! "

Brother (frightened to disgrace): "Really?"

"How could mom lie to you?"

"Really, how did she die?"

"... well, ... I bought instant noodles and had an accident ..."

The third story car accident

In high school, there was a thrilling scene in the fruit and vegetable market in front of Huazhong Bridge. ....

Because the fruit and vegetable market is the dividing point of many cars, and it is also the off-duty time, the people in our bus are packed, and the people standing at the door of the car, including their faces, cling to the door like geckos.

After the driver and others got on the bus, they started to set off. Because they were going to get on the bridge, he kept stepping on the accelerator to speed up. When he found an old woman crossing the road in front, it was too late to brake!

I saw the old woman lying on the road in front of the car, motionless, and a pile of intestines flowed out of her side and began to ooze blood. ......

Some people started screaming ... some people were speechless, but the driver was pale and afraid to go down. A strange thing happened when the driver in the car was in a daze. ......

Suddenly, the old woman stood up trembling, took out a broken plastic bag and began to gut, muttering, "Yao!" "

Shoulu ... just bought intestines, how to eat them ... "

No.4 story bento

Tell you a ghost story, it's horrible!

On a silent moonlit night, a traveler crossed the mountains and unfortunately got lost.

Just when he was hungry and tired, he finally found a thatched cottage far ahead.

He ran up happily, knocked on the door and shouted, "Hello?"

Then an old woman came out to open the door.

After the traveler explained his purpose, the old woman kindly gave the traveler a box of lunch and promised to stay at her house temporarily that night.

The next morning, the traveler woke up and was surprised to find that there was no thatched cottage around, so he slept on the ground. What's more, she is an old woman, but the walker is not afraid, and she is very grateful to the woman, thinking that she is the embodiment of Bodhisattva to help those in need.

So he bowed in place and left with gratitude. After a long journey, he finally returned to the village.

When he came back, he told the story to everyone. After a long time, someone finally said, "The old woman you mentioned,

She died three years ago. Hearing this, the traveler felt a sudden pain in his body and shouted:

"No ... I, ... I ... I ate an expired lunch!"

The fifth story is Yin and Yang eyes.

There is a senior who wants to ride home with a younger brother with yin and yang eyes.

At first, the senior warned his junior: "Wait a minute, no matter what you see, don't tell me!" "

After a while, they passed by the cemetery, and the senior shouted and grabbed her clothes. .....

Junior said, "study ... study ... senior ..."

The senior shouted, "Shut up! I do not want to hear anything! "

Junior said, "But ..."

Senior: "Don't tell me what you see!" "

After a hurricane arrived at its destination, the senior said, "What did you want to tell me just now?"

Junior year: "When I passed the cemetery, I wanted to tell you that you dropped your wallet, but you rode over without looking back." ......

The sixth story is the beating head.

One day, a member of the track and field team was running on the track and field late at night.

As a result, I saw a head shaking up and down in the dark, and my feet were too scared to run.

Then he stopped moving, stopped in mid-air and looked at him with a straight face.

He wants to run fast, but he feels weak all over.

Slowly, my head turned and floated away. When it reaches a bright spot,

Only then did he see clearly that it was a girl dressed in black with a skipping rope in her hand.

The seventh floor barracks. Damn it.

This story was told to me by my brother who was a soldier in Kinmen when he came back from vacation. .....

He said that their company had a soldier brother who graduated from college. One night, he was on sentry duty, and he hurried back to the company. Tell Dahe that he has hit a ghost, and everyone asks him what the ghost looks like. He vowed to say:

"I saw a Pikachu pass in front of me ..."