Joke Books Read by Ancient People —— Excerpt from Laughing at Guang Lin (Volume 8)

A scholar, a Taoist and a monk are all in the same boat. The boatman untied the cable a little late, and everyone roared: "Dog bones, how can you be so careless?" The boatman got off the boat in anger and lay flat in the river. He stopped and asked, "You just called me dog bone. What kind of bones are you, scholar? " You are right, spare your life, or you will be thrown into the water! "The scholar said," I am a scholar who climbs the dragon and attaches the phoenix. Naturally, I am keel. The second Taoist said, "We are monks, and we are immortal bones." The monk had nothing to say, but he cried in a panic, "I beg your pardon, I am bald and have never had a bone." "

A monk came back from a banquet. Asked which seat to sit in, the man replied, "The first seat is Du, and the second seat is Xu, who is a young monk under the navel."

When the old monk went back to the convenience, he was accidentally stabbed in the ass by the tip of a bamboo shoot, but it hurt. When the little novice monk saw this, he put his hands together and said, "Amitabha, the heavenly newspaper."

A scholar asked the monk, "How to write bald words?" The monk said, "Just bend the scholar's tail."

When the monk was on the road, a page shouted, "monk, monk, you bald man, slutty." The monk said angrily, "A stiff head turned over your mother's stomach." The woman said angrily, "My little servant is just playing. Why do you say such rude things? " The monk said, "Empress, don't you think I'm serious? Why worry? "

It's strange that a dog was born suddenly in the pigsty. Neighborhood circles get together to discuss: "Tao is raised by dogs and is also a kind of pig;" Tao is a pig and a kind of dog. "

A monk stole a woman and chased her for her husband. He jumped off the wall and fell down again. Seeing a bald mark on the ground, he squeezed his fist and said, "I am not afraid that the Taoist priest will not admit it."

Whoever has a nun and a prostitute is dead. The king asked the prostitute, "What was your physiology in your last life?" The prostitute said, "Raise Han to receive guests." Wang said, "Raising Han people is convenient for being alone. Return to the world and go to Super Life early. " Ask a nun: "Who are you?" A: "Be a vegetarian and read Buddha." Wang also ruled that the cloud: "Being a vegetarian and chanting Buddha is a snake in your mouth. Baizhu tablets, broken spine. " "To tell you the truth, my little woman is a nun, but in fact she is a private prostitute behind Han's back," he said.

When watching a Taoist take a bath, please ask the teacher first, then the second teacher, and then the master, one by one, without disorder. He sighed with emotion: "I am the only monk who has no rules." The old monk didn't go down, and the young monk took off his clothes first. "

Three people were traveling together. They met a man in rags. A friend said, "It's like Orion Zhang." One man said, "Otherwise, it's like a fisherman casting a net." Another person said, "None of them are accurate. In my opinion, it looks like a broken temple, which has been broken for many years. " Asked why, he replied, "I saw the monk first, and then I saw the monk."

The teacher's name is Liang, and the student's name is Liang. The guest asked, "How to distinguish the names of sages and mentoring?" The disciple replied, "The light above is the tutor, and the light below is the young monk."