Don’t take children’s tantrums seriously, Li Meijin: Many problems can be seen by adulthood

A person with a gentle personality, a smile, and a good temper can always make people feel like a spring breeze, and people can't help but get close to him. Well-connected and popular, life and work are particularly smooth.

On the contrary, a person with a grumpy personality, raised eyebrows, glares, and bad temper makes people feel like they are sitting on pins and needles and cannot be approached. Most people avoid it for fear of being infected by this sentiment.

A bad temper not only brings negative emotions to people, but the most terrifying thing is that it can easily lead to murder.

I believe you all still remember: On August 14, 2019, in Zhumadian, Henan, just because of a piece of ice cream and a joke, the woman stabbed her boyfriend with scissors in anger, causing her boyfriend to die after rescue efforts failed. , a young life disappeared, which is sad.

Why do some people have bad tempers? Professor Li Meijin once analyzed: All people’s characteristics have their origins. A person can see many problems by the time he reaches adulthood, and many can be seen before he is three years old.

Indeed, it is not difficult to find in our daily lives that babies in early childhood love to lose their temper. Whenever something doesn't go his way, he'll cry and make a fuss.

In fact, this situation is generally related to family education and growing environment. Usually divided into two situations:

The first situation: excessive pampering.

At home, dad, mom, grandpa, grandma... are like stars holding the moon, pampering their children and responding to their requests.

Parents are captured by their children little by little. They know clearly that their children are making unreasonable demands. For babies raised in this environment, when they see their children yelling and crying, they will When he rolls around on the ground, throws things and makes a splash, his demands will be met immediately.

As time goes by, the number of times increases. The child knows that this method can achieve his goal, and if it works repeatedly, he will develop the habit of losing his temper when things happen, and eventually his temper will become worse and worse.

The second situation is: lack of parental love.

Children are generally fostered in the homes of other relatives. Most of them are introverted, don't like to laugh, tend to have low self-esteem, and appear honest on the outside. In fact, they lack a sense of security inside and are often emotionally unstable.

Never speak out when something doesn’t go your way. When you don't get what you want, you will be filled with anger and may engage in extreme behaviors such as pulling your hair or even banging your head against the wall.

When these children grow up, they will be indifferent to people and things, competitive and violent, and may have a split personality.

Whether it is doting or lack of love, any reason why a child loses his temper should attract the attention of parents.

The actions of a mother and father born in the 1990s attracted praise from many netizens. After rejecting the child's unreasonable request, the child immediately lay on the ground crying and rolling around. They did not compromise and left their children to die, adhering to their principles and watching calmly.

If a child's tantrums persist into adulthood, they can be difficult to overcome and correct. Therefore, it is strongly recommended to do this:

1. It is best for parents to raise their children by themselves. If conditions do not permit, the mother should bring the child to at least three years old.

2. Do not pamper your children too much. Deliberately cultivate their good behaviors and habits, so that the baby understands what requirements are reasonable and what requirements are unreasonable and cannot be met.

3. All family members should maintain a consistent attitude and a united front. One person cannot be a good person and the other a bad person.

4. When your baby loses his temper, patiently persuade and guide him correctly.

5. If the persuasion is ineffective, then decisively adopt a cold treatment, let him cry and act violently, and ignore him. After many times of this, the child's bad habit of throwing tantrums will diminish until it disappears.

6. After the child has vented and calmed down, comfort the child and tell the child that this behavior is wrong.

The legendary White Dragon King of Thailand once said: As long as a person has a good temper, everything will be fine.

Many people come here and ask me whether my career is good or not? Is the family good? How is the child? Is the marriage good? I'm just answering: Is your temper good? Everything will have an answer.

If there is a tantrum-prone baby at home, parents must pay special attention to it and educate and correct it in time, otherwise it will affect the baby's life.

But I also want to make it clear that you should not train your children to have a "good temper" that is always forbearing and loses principles. This is not what I think of a good temper.

A good temper does not mean that you have no temper, but that you can control it freely without losing your temper. It is a kind of good temper that has persistence, principle, bottom line and wisdom.

Do you have a tantrum-prone baby around you? Welcome to discuss!