I want IQ questions, brain teasers and cold jokes! ! !

In ancient times, there were two women fighting for a child, and the county magistrate could not determine whose child it was, so he asked them to pull the child over.

As a result, the child was torn

Once upon a time, a pig lost his wallet ..... and didn't eat breakfast every day. ....

Once upon a time, there was a vegetable that he wanted to grow up quickly so that people could choose the cooked soup. As a result, he grows and grows, that is, he is not tall, and the longer he grows, the bigger he gets.

Old-fashioned, but no one picked him.

One day, a fudge walked in the street for a long time. He said, oh, my legs are so soft.

There was a man named Locomotive. The next day, he was rode away.

Xiaomei wrote down her wishes when she grew up in her composition book: first, I hope to have a lovely child; Second, I wish there were.

A husband who loves me.

It turns out that the teacher wrote a comment: Please pay attention to the order.

Bananas. Bananas? Run, the banana running in front felt very hot, so it took off its skin and was still on the road, and the banana behind it stepped forward.

The banana skin slipped, so the banana in front won.

Brain Twister

I was talking to the pig just now.

B: Oh.

I was just talking to you. You are a pig.

Are you a dragon?

B: What's the matter?

A: If you are a dragon, I will kill you with my palm.

A: "What are you laughing at?"

B: "I only laugh when I see you smile!" " "

A: "Oh, oh, oh ~ ~"

B: "Then what are you laughing at?"

Answer: "I only laughed when I predicted that you would laugh!" " "

Can you tell me how to get to the hospital?

B: It's very simple. Now you close your eyes, go to the middle of the road and stop. It will arrive in about ten minutes.