Jokes and jokes: The way a woman sleeps _ laughs till her stomach hurts _ laughs till her girlfriend is happy.

The first type is veneer type: women like to put their faces close to men's faces and scratch men's ears or nostrils with their hair. The second kind is aggressive: at first they share the world equally in bed, then the man retreats one inch, the woman retreats one inch, the man retreats another inch, the woman retreats another inch, the man retreats another inch, the woman retreats another inch ... Finally, the man is forced to have nowhere to live, and he falls off the edge of the bed.

The third is the mask type: before going to bed, the woman sits in front of the dressing table, with strong light on, big face oil, curly hair, plastic surgery and beauty. After a busy day, she finally went to bed. But at this moment, what the husband saw was not the charming wife with makeup, but a hedgehog monster with a greasy face.

The fourth type is narcissism: they sit on the edge of the bed and don't want to sleep. They have to listen to the record player for a while, smoke a cigarette and wear sexy pajamas. They walked around the bedroom talking nonsense, which kept her husband awake.

Fifth, fighting style: I don't like quilts before going to bed; After falling asleep, due to hypothermia, they scratched the quilt, and the sleeping state at this time made the claw fish sigh.

The sixth type is neurotic patients: at the slightest sound or touch, they will jump out of bed and never sleep again.

The seventh kind is a reader who is reading in bed: if he is tireless in the middle of the night and occasionally gains experience, he will wake up his husband and discuss with him. If you read martial arts novels, you may take your husband as a kung fu target. If you read detective stories, treat your husband as an imaginary enemy. Seeing the tense atmosphere, I held up my book and plunged into my husband's arms, too scared to move. Don't let your husband move The eighth kind is people who stay up late: such people sleep little, even stay up late, staring at their husbands with their eyes open. When the husband woke up, the first thing he saw was a pair of eyes staring at himself, and the second time he woke up, he still stared at himself. Third time, fourth time, even several times ... every time. Think about it, how can this make my husband stand it?