Horror joke phrase

1. Tell me a longer horror joke story (not particularly short). 1 A woman works the night shift and a man is following me. This woman is very alert. She passed by the grave and had a brainwave. She said to the grave, Dad, I'm back. Open the door.

The man was frightened and ran away screaming. The woman was relieved and was about to leave when suddenly a gloomy voice came from the grave: Daughter, you forgot your key again.

The woman was frightened and ran away. At this moment, a grave robber emerged from the grave and said, Shit, I delayed my work and scared you to death! As soon as the voice of grave robbery fell, I found an old man carving a tombstone with a chisel. I was curious, so I asked him. The old man said angrily: NND, they carved my name wrong ... The great fear of robbing the tomb screamed and ran away.

The old man sneered, "Shit, you dare to steal my business, it's still tender ..." Just then, the chisel accidentally fell to the ground and the old man was about to pick it up. When he bent down, he found a chisel in his hand in the grass. The old man was shocked, and suddenly a voice came: "You want to die! Change my house number! ! "。 Old man, stop fooling me and get down the hill! At this time, a scavenger climbed out of the grass. "Mama of, do a piece of iron to be such a great god. He said that in a primary school, there are 85 classrooms, 15 offices and a * * * 100 house, but one of the houses is locked at any time because strange things happened in that house many years ago, although no one participated in those strange things. The president of that session is a famous local atheist. He felt very sorry when he saw an idle big house, so he arranged a new classroom in this big room that had been sealed for decades. There are 30 students in this classroom, 16 boys and 14 girls. My uncle Amin was also a student of that class. Amin said that most of them live in school. Only students in the village next to the school will choose to stay in school. In fact, the accommodation fee is not very high. At that time, the school accommodation was indeed much cheaper than it is now, but the dormitory conditions at that time were also very poor. Amin shares a dormitory with seven boys. In summer, especially at night, mosquitoes are everywhere in that dormitory, and her roommates either play cards or smoke. Therefore, Amin often reviews his lessons alone in the classroom until dawn. One night, Amin was reviewing in the classroom. The watch in the classroom has pointed to 12:00. Amin suddenly felt pain in her lower abdomen, thinking that she was going to relieve herself, so she took the toilet paper with her and walked like a toilet. Just as he just walked out of the classroom, the lights in the classroom went out and the whole corridor was dark. Amin felt very strange. He was going to investigate, so as soon as he entered the classroom door, he walked into the classroom alone and tripped. Amin hurriedly groped down and finally picked up the toilet paper. Suddenly, he found a man standing by the window. The man is wearing this white dress. He couldn't see the man's expression. He subconsciously rubbed his eyes and let go of his hand. That man has disappeared. At this time, all the lights in the classroom are on. Amin is a little nervous. He didn't even turn off the light and ran straight back to the dormitory. He went back to the dormitory and lay in bed. The roll of toilet paper has been loose, like a thread, and has been propped up. The other end of the line extends all the way out of the dormitory. The person who just saw the white clothes is walking towards the dormitory upside down with toilet paper. Amin even saw the man's face through the dormitory window. What scares Amin even more is that the man has a long red tongue in his mouth! The man turned his face out of the window while sneering. He lowered his eyes and stared at Amin, revealing a series of gloomy smiles. Amin was completely confused at that time and didn't know what to do, but the' person' outside the window was still lying on the ground, E799Be5Bae97AEE7ad94EB893E5b19E31333264388. The paper scattered on the ground is like his footprint. He walked forward and bypassed the window. Amin could even feel him outside the door, and the door opened quietly. The man has entered the dormitory and continues to walk slowly. At this time, Amin realized what toilet paper he was holding, but something like cloth. He saw it, too That' man' is wrapping white cloth around himself bit by bit. Just as he was about to get close to Amin's bed, Xiao Zhang, who was sleeping on Amin's bed, woke up. He seems to be going to the bathroom. When he saw Amin's toilet paper, he took it away, scolded him {what toilet paper to sleep with} and ran to the toilet. The' man' laughed and ran out with Xiao Zhang.

Amin tried to stop Xiao Zhang, but he couldn't talk at all. After a while, he heard Xiao Zhang scream ... The next day, people found Xiao Zhang dead in the toilet. He was dropped on the roof of the toilet by a piece of white cloth! When Amin came to the classroom, he saw a roll of white toilet paper on the seat. The next year, the classroom was closed again. However, before the classroom was blocked, Amin transferred to another school. Now he works in a chemical factory in the northeast. One year I went to visit my family. He told me the story. He said that many things are doomed. For example, you are doomed not to die, even if you encounter any big risks. If you are not in danger, you will die. Amin took out a photo before the accident, which was a photo of eight people in their dormitory. In the photo, Xiao Zhang has a white silk around his neck ... believe it or not. Today I go to school and have classes in the classroom as usual.

Shortly after the bell rang, I was like a wandering soul, staring blankly at the corridor outside the window. It will happen soon.

A man came out of the stairs on the second floor at the door of our classroom. He wears western-style clothes and his hair is Mediterranean. Looking down again, huh? It is the headmaster who is patrolling the class. Please sit still. He walked with a brush in one hand and an old thread-bound book in the other. Why is the headmaster acting strange today? I was still sitting on the wall by the window, the corridor was outside, and I saw someone passing by clearly.

I saw him approach the wall and then disappeared. I thought he was taking notes on the other side of the wall. After waiting for more than ten minutes, I still didn't see him.

Then I asked the whole class that no one saw anyone walking in the corridor in a math class just now.

2. Horror sentence 1. Tolerance? Hum, only the strong deserve to forgive, and the forgiveness of the weak is just a joke.

2。 You can't, can you? Then I'll do it. Killing one is killing, killing two is killing, even if killing him is assassination, what about a sea of blood? It's too cheap for them to force my father to kill my mother and let them die like this.

this ...

At this time, life and death are not so important. The shortness of life is as common as the change of butterflies and seasons.

4。 If the world is crazy, then let's see who is crazier!

5。 I want this day to cover my eyes, and I want this place to bury my heart.

6。 Night is always the best fig leaf for evil. At night, those evil hands are waving in the sky.

7。 At that moment, everyone seemed to have fallen into an endless nightmare and could never wake up. The demons in the dream kept beating their souls and burning their thoughts.

8。 Life and death are opposite and homologous, and death is not the end.

9. Death is not terrible, what is terrible is the process of death.

10。 Love is who lives a luxurious life, but hate is actually not a painful sadness. It turns out that it has never been missed, it is pain.

3. Ask for a horrible word. A terrible sentence:

The night is thick, like black and cold blood flowing from rotting corpses, winding the sky and the earth. The moon hovers over the school alone, dimly lit, like tears in the corner of a woman's eye. High-rise buildings are blurred by darkness, and from a distance, they look like bloody faces. It began to rain after dark, everything was wet, the skin of trees and soil began to fester, and the air was suffocating. Lightning and thunder, depicting the involuntary fate, let the whole night fall apart quickly. The scenery was pale for a moment, and then it was dark. The weeping ghost has no way to escape, and its soul is naked and stiff. The horizon collapsed, and the blurred white light spots overlapped with the huge black shadows, tearing the night in despair. Dead trees rotted like bones, beheaded, hands reaching into the sky, speechless. The hemp rope hanging under the branches was badly blown by the wind, and the wet body shook slightly. The rope loop tightens the neck of the corpse, the facial muscles contract downward, the tongue root in the throat desperately sticks out of the mouth, and the eyes are wide open and round, staring at the ground or deeper. Long, black and wet hair attached to the skull. The body is a woman. Students wear ordinary school uniforms, except for a pair of red women's shoes on their feet, which are particularly thrilling. Red shoes are very old, with mottled lines and bare leather. There was a flash of lightning, and the shadow of the woman corpse was instantly reflected on the ground. It is chilling that four figures appeared on the ground at the same time. No, I can't say this is a number. There is no one around the dead tree. Only the cold wind roared with raindrops. It is a shadow that appears on the ground out of thin air, just like a human figure, or a shadow that looks up from the ground. They surrounded the female corpse, as if welcoming their partners, and disappeared together in the night when the lightning subsided.

Heaven and earth were quiet, the wind and rain disappeared, the windows of the teaching building were blown open, and the empty classroom was dark. Then, there seems to be a very light voice, which sounds very weak and echoes in this opaque campus. The crow that stayed on the branch of the woman corpse started up, flapped its wings and disappeared in the moonlight. In the field of dreams, the details flood from blue to gray, the world sinks into shadow, and the raindrops that are taken away from life fall stiffly from the sky. Dirty death stories lined up, and sad voices were entangled in the wind and filled the whole sky. In the dark and distant corner, a slight cry meandered and flowed, melted in the air by the rain, and the outline was washed away, leaving only a thin layer, like the skin of a dead person.

4. Have a super scary joke. Mom asked me to translate! ! ! (Super hilarious)

Today, I was watching a DVD, and my mother came in with another book and said, tell me what these words mean.

Mom: What does this "I don't know" mean?

I said, "I don't know."

Mom: I sent you to college for several years. How come you don't know anything !

I said: no! I don't know! !

Mom: Still mouth shut! ! ! ! $@%! #$^&； %#$%@$%@#$%! ^%^! ^%$^#&； Amp .. (a good beating)

Mom: You're telling me this. What does "I know" mean, mean? You should know. Tell me about it.

I said, "I know."

Mom: Tell me if you know.

I said, "I know."

Mom: Are you finding fault? You just cleaned up a little, didn't you?

I said: I know!

Mom: I know you haven't said it yet! ! Don't pretend to understand! & ampamp*$%^@$#! % $ @% # * $ # $% (another beating)

Mom: Be careful. You spent so much money to send you to college, and now you can't do anything. You can put on airs in front of my mother for a while. Please explain the last one to me. If you can't tell me that I'm cleaning you up, please translate what "I know but I don't want to tell you."

I fainted, picked up a pillow and hit it on my head for more than 30 times, hit my head against the wall for more than 40 times, slapped my mouth with my hands for more than 50 times, and kicked the corner of the table for more than 60 times. When I was bloody, I asked my mother: Are you satisfied now?

So her old man came to ask me again: "Son, what do you mean, I am anonymous, don't fool me?" "

Me: "I'm bored, so leave me alone."

Mom: "looking for a beating, talking to your mother like this" (so I was beaten)

Mom asked again; "I didn't hear anything, repeat. What do you mean? "

I said, "I didn't hear you clearly. Say it again. "

Mother said it again: I didn't hear anything, repeat it.

"I didn't catch that. Say it again. "

The result was tied.

Mom asked again, "What do you think?"

I said, "What did you say?" (beaten again)

Mother asked again, "What do you mean by looking it up in the dictionary?"

I said, "Look it up in the dictionary."

"Look it up in the dictionary. I asked what you were doing." (beaten)

Mother asked again, "you'd better ask some physical conditions." How do you translate it? "

I said, "You'd better ask someone else."

"You are my son, I ask others why, looking for a fight."

"ah! God help me! "

"God help me!"

"Play with your mother, and God won't save you! (beaten)

I ask you again: "Use your brain and think about it. What does that mean?" "

I said, "Use your head and think again."

"Son of a bitch, don't you dare hit me" and then do it.

I quickly said, "It means that only mothers are good in the world."

"Well, that's more like it. I'll make you something to eat later and ask you tomorrow. " Is it funny?

5. Ask for a 1 sentence horror story, which is very short. 1. I want to take a taxi alone. The driver asked me: Where are you two going? 2. A man walked out of the scene of a car accident and someone stopped him: Hey! Your hand is still in the car! The car was driving very fast, and an old woman looked at me from the window.

4, driving a motorcycle to pick up my girlfriend from work, it was a little cold in the middle of the night, and my girlfriend gently opened her arms and hugged me. Suddenly she touched my face: "Is it cold?" Just want to interface suddenly found that the waist girlfriend's hand has not left, ah! 5, surfing the Internet last night, my friend suddenly knocked on my window and asked me out to play ~! I was about to open the window and said I couldn't go, but suddenly I remembered that I had moved from 1 building to 10 building ~ ~ Who is that? 6. In the middle of the night, I woke up from a nightmare and saw my brother sitting by the bed. He gently asked me, "What's the matter?" I said: I dreamed that a group of ghosts with heads were chasing me! Is that so? After that, my brother cut off his head.

7. The office elevator only stops at15-30th floor. Xiao F, who works on the 30th floor, works overtime until late at night and then goes downstairs by elevator alone. There is no one outside the door. Finally, she stopped at the entrance of 14 floor and said, it's so crowded. I want to come in, too.