Little jokes in classical Chinese

1. A selection of short jokes in ancient classical Chinese

The question is inappropriate.

Available online and in bookstores. For example: Joke Yidan Original Text A scholar was about seventy years old when he suddenly gave birth to a son.

Born because of age, it is called age. Not long after, another son was born, who seemed to be able to read and learn knowledge.

The following year, another son was born. Laughing and saying: 62616964757a686964616fe58685e5aeb931333365643661 "It's a joke to have a baby at such an old age."

Because of the name, it was called "a joke." The three of them were old and had nothing to do, so they all ordered to go into the mountains to collect firewood. When they returned, my husband asked He said: "Which of the three sons has more firewood?" The wife said: "I have a lot of age, no knowledge at all, but a lot of jokes."

Translation: There is a scholar. When he was nearly seventy, his wife suddenly gave birth to a son. Because he gave birth to a son at an advanced age, he named him "Jiu". Not long after, another son was born. He looked like a scholar, so he named him "Xuewen".

Another son was born in the third year. The scholar laughed and said: "It's a joke that you can still have a son at such an old age." So he named it "Joke".

When the three sons grew up and had nothing to do, the scholar asked them to go into the mountains to collect firewood. When they came back, the husband asked his wife: "Who among the three can collect more firewood?" The wife said: "You are older. If you have a lot of knowledge, you have no knowledge at all, but you have a lot of jokes. "Snobbish people will avoid them every time they are in trouble.

When a fellow traveler asked him why, he replied: "I gave up my relatives." This happened again and again, and the traveler got tired of it.

I met a beggar by chance, and tried to evade him, saying: "I want to give up my marriage." He asked: "Why do you have this order to marry me?" He said: "But the good ones are all recognized by you."

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Translation: There was a vain man. When he went out and saw dignitaries passing by, he stayed away. People traveling with him asked him why he did this, and he said, "That's my relative."

This happened many times, and every time he did this, people traveling with him found it annoying. Later, suddenly I met a beggar on the road. The people who were traveling with him imitated his behavior and hid aside, saying, "That beggar is my relative."

The vain person asked, "You How come you have such poor relatives?" The person traveling with me said, "Because you have recognized all the good things." People from the original text of eating olives went to the city to have a drink, and there were olives in the banquet.

The country people tasted it, but it was astringent and tasteless, so they asked the people sitting at the table: "What is this?" As a name, he remembered it and told people: "I tasted a strange thing in the city today, and I named it 'Su'."

The crowd didn't believe it, but the person opened his mouth and exhaled and said: "You don't believe it. , Nowadays, everything is vulgar." Translation: A farmer went to the city for a banquet, and there were olives in the banquet.

The farmer took it to his mouth and ate it. It was both astringent and unpalatable, so he asked the people at the table: "What is this?" The people at the table thought he was vulgar and said contemptuously: "Vulgar. The farmer thought that "Cu" was the name of olives, so he kept it in his mind and told people after returning home: "I ate a strange fruit in the city today, called 'Cu'."

Everyone. The farmer didn't believe it, so he opened his mouth and said, "You don't believe it, now I'm talking about vulgarity." The original text of the mocking joker was to let a guest have lunch, but the guest had already finished the whole bowl, and there was no more food.

The guest wanted the host to know, so he pretended to say: "A certain family has a house for sale." So he turned the mouth of the bowl to the host and said: "The rafters are also this big."

The host Seeing that there was no rice in the bowl, he called out to the boy to add more food. Because he asked the guest: "How much is he worth?" The guest said: "Now that I have food to eat, I won't sell it."

Translation: A man invited a guest to have lunch, and the guest had already finished a bowl. , no one helped him. The guest wanted the host to know, so he pretended to say: "A certain family has a house for sale."

Then he deliberately pointed the mouth of the bowl towards the host and said: "The rafters are also as thick as the mouth of the bowl." The host saw the bowl. There was no food in the house, so he hurriedly called the servant boy to bring him more food.

Then he asked the guest: "How much did he sell it for?" The guest replied: "Now that I have food to eat, I won't sell it." Lies Original Text Some people are used to lying.

His servants will be round in every generation.

One day, he said to someone: "A well in my house was blown by the strong wind to the house next door yesterday."

Everyone thought it had never happened before. Pu Yuanzhi said: "It's true.

My well is close to the neighbor's fence. The wind was strong last night. I saw the fence blowing over the well, but it was like the well blowing over the neighbor's house. "One day, he said to others: "Someone shot a goose with a bowl of rice soup on his head."

The crowd was surprised again. Pu Yuan said: "This is also the case.

My master was eating noodle soup in the courtyard. Suddenly a goose fell down and its head fell into the bowl. Could it be that the goose was holding noodle soup on its head?" day.

He also said to the people: "The Han family has a warm sky tent, which covers the heaven and the earth so tightly that there is no gap." The servant raised his eyebrows and said: "Master is offended, and he is telling such lies all over the sky. How can I cover it up?"

Translation: There was a man who was used to telling lies, and his servants always lied for him. One day, he said to people: "A well in my house was blown to the house next door by strong wind yesterday."

Everyone thought that such a thing had never happened before. His servant justified his lie and said: "It is true that my well is close to the neighbor's fence. The wind was strong last night and blew the fence to the well, just like the well blew to the neighbor's house." < /p>

One day, he said to people again: "Someone shot down a wild goose with a bowl of rice soup on his head." Everyone was very surprised and did not believe what he said.

His servant explained his lie again and said: "This happened too. My master was eating noodle soup in the courtyard. Suddenly, a goose fell down and its head happened to fall into the bowl. Isn't it a goose? "Powder soup on your head?" Another day, he said to others: "The Han family has a warm sky tent, which covers the sky and the earth tightly, without any gaps." The servant frowned in embarrassment after hearing this. Said: "Master has gone too far, telling such a big lie, how can I cover it up."

Original text of Lishui Xuetai A scholar's servant peed on the baby, and did not urinate for a long time. He was frightened and said: "The school is here." The doll immediately peed.

The scholar asked why and replied: "I saw you scholars were so frightened that they peed and pooped when they heard that they were dismounted. I know this." The scholar sighed and said, "I didn't expect that this baby could inherit his father's ambition. Keshao is scholarly; even more unexpected is that this school platform is good at benefiting from the water and can help with defecation."

Translation: A servant in a scholar's family held a baby to urinate, but the child did not urinate for a long time. The servant frightened him and said: "The school is coming."

The doll immediately peed. The scholar asked him why and replied: "I saw that you scholars were so frightened that they peed when they heard that the academy was coming, so I frightened him like this."

The scholar sighed and said, "I didn't expect this. The baby can inherit his father's ambition and continue his scholarly career; it is even more unexpected. 2. Are there any short jokes in classical Chinese?

The original text of the joke is that a scholar suddenly gave birth to a son when he was about seventy.

He was born because of his age, so he gave birth to another son soon, who seemed to be able to study and was named learned.

The next year, he gave birth to another son and said with a smile: "I still have a son at this old age." , what a joke. ”

Because of its name, it is called “a joke.” "The three of them were old and had nothing to do. They all ordered to go into the mountains to collect firewood. When they returned, the husband asked: "Which of the three sons has more firewood? The wife said: "I have gained a lot of age, but I have no knowledge at all, but I am full of jokes." "

Translation: There was a scholar who was nearly seventy years old. His wife suddenly gave birth to a son. Because he was already old, he gave birth to a son, so he named him "Jiu". Soon after, another son was born. The son looked like a scholar, so he named him "Xuewen". In the third year, another son was born. The scholar smiled and said: "It's really cool that you can have a son at such an old age." joke. "So it was named "Joke".

When the three sons grew up and had nothing to do, the scholar asked them to go into the mountains to collect firewood. When they came back, the husband asked his wife: "Who among the three can collect firewood? many? The wife said: "I have gained a lot of age, but I have no knowledge at all, but I have a lot of jokes." "The original text of "Yin Shu" is a snobbish person, and he must avoid it every time he comes out.

A fellow traveler asked why, and he replied: "I gave up my relatives." " This happened so many times that people traveling with him got tired of it.

I met a beggar by chance and tried to evade him, saying, "I want to give up my relatives. Asked: "Why do you want to marry me like this?" Said: "But the good ones are all recognized by you." "

Translation: There was a vain man. When he saw a dignitary passing by when he was going out, he stayed away. People traveling with him asked him why he did this, and he said: "That's my relative.

"

He did this many times, and every time he did this, the people traveling with him found it annoying. Later, suddenly he met a beggar on the road. The people traveling with him followed his example and hid aside, saying: "That beggar is a relative of mine. "

The vain person asked: "Why do you have such poor relatives? The person traveling with me said, "Because all the good things have been recognized by you." "Eat olives" original text: A countryman went to the city to have a drink, and there were olives in the banquet.

The countrymen ate them, but they were astringent and tasteless, so they asked the people sitting at the table: "What is this?" The person sitting at the table, with his village spirit, said disdainfully: "It's vulgar." "The villagers named it "Su", so they remembered it and told people: "I tasted a strange thing in the city today, and I named it 'Su'. "

The crowd didn't believe it, so he opened his mouth and said, "You don't believe it, now you are full of vulgar words. "Translation: A farmer went to the city for a banquet, and there were olives in the banquet.

The farmer took it to his mouth and ate it. It was astringent and unpalatable, so he asked the people at the table: "What is this? The people at the same table thought he was vulgar and said contemptuously: "Vulgar." The farmer thought that "Cu" was the name of olives, so he kept it in his mind. After returning home, he said to people: "I ate a strange fruit in the city today, called 'Cu'." "

Everyone didn't believe it, so the farmer opened his mouth and said, "You don't believe it, now I'm full of vulgar words. "Original text about a funny guest who invited a guest for lunch, but the guest had already finished his whole bowl, and there was no more food.

The guest wanted his host to know about it, so he pretended to say: "A certain family has a house and wants to sell it. So he turned the mouth of the bowl to the owner and said, "The rafters are also this big." "

When the host saw that there was no rice in the bowl, he hurriedly asked the boy to add more rice. Because he asked the guest, "How much does he want to be worth?" The guest said, "Now that I have food to eat, I won't sell it." "

Translation: A man invited a guest to have lunch. The guest had already finished his bowl, and no one helped him. The guest wanted the host to know, so he pretended to say: "A certain family has a house for sale.

Then he deliberately pointed the mouth of the bowl towards the owner and said, "The rafters are also as thick as the mouth of the bowl." "The master saw that there was no rice in the bowl and hurriedly called the servant to give him more rice.

Then he asked the guest: "How much did he sell it for? The guest replied: "Now that we have food to eat, we won't sell it." "The original text of Yuan Lie is that some people are used to telling lies.

His servants are Yuan Zhi every generation. One day, he said to someone: "My well is blown by the strong wind yesterday to the house next door. "

Everyone thought it had never happened before. Pu Yuanzhi said: "It does happen.

My well is close to the neighbor's fence. The wind was strong last night. I saw the fence blowing past the well, but it was like the well blowing to the neighbor's house. One day, he said to another person: "Someone shot a goose and put a bowl of rice soup on his head." "

The crowd was surprised again. Pu Yuan said: "This is also the case.

My master was eating noodle soup in the courtyard. Suddenly a goose fell down and its head fell into the bowl. Could it be that the goose was holding noodle soup on its head? "One day.

He also said to others: "The Han family has a warm sky tent, which covers the heaven and earth tightly without any gaps. The servant raised his eyebrows and said, "Master, how can I cover up this lie?" "

Translation: There was a man who was used to telling lies, and his servants always lied for him. One day, he said to people: "A well in my house was blown to the next door's house by the strong wind yesterday. "

Everyone thought that such a thing had never happened before. His servant justified his lie and said: "It is true that such a thing happened. My well is close to the neighbor's fence. It was windy last night. Blowing the fence to the well is like blowing the well to the neighbor's house. "

One day, he said to someone again: "Someone shot down a goose with a bowl of rice soup on his head. "Everyone was very surprised and didn't believe what he said.

His servant justified his lie again and said: "It happened too. My master was eating noodle soup in the courtyard. Suddenly, a goose fell down. , the goose's head happened to fall into the bowl, doesn't it mean that the goose's head is carrying powdered soup? "Another day, he said to others: "The Han family has a warm sky tent, which covers the heaven and earth tightly, without any gaps. After hearing this, the servant frowned in embarrassment and said, "Master has gone too far. He is telling such a big lie. How can I cover it up?" "

Li Shui Xuetai's original text: A scholar's servant peed on a baby, and after not peeing for a long time, he was frightened and said: "Xue Tai is here. "The baby immediately peed.

The scholar asked why and replied: "I saw you scholars dismounting from the stage and being so frightened that they peed and pooped out. I know this.

The scholar sighed and said, "I didn't expect that this baby could inherit his father's ambition and be a scholar. I didn't expect that this school platform could benefit from the small water and help with defecation." "

Translation: A servant of a scholar's family held a baby to pee, but the child did not pee for a long time. The servant frightened him and said: "Xuetai is coming. "

The doll peed immediately. The scholar asked him why and replied: "I saw that your scholar was so frightened that he peed and pooped when he heard that the academy was coming, so I scared him like this. "

The scholar sighed and said: "I didn't expect that this baby could inherit his father's ambition and continue his scholarly pursuits; I didn't expect that this school is good at diuresis and can pass urine and urine. "Afraid of candidates. Yuanwen Xiucai was afraid of the annual exam. When he heard that the school was dismounted, he became panicked and went to pick up the school. 3. A selection of short jokes in ancient classical Chinese

Laughing at the two mountains of selling contracts

The Hushu family was poor and had to cut off their mustache. Because they had no way of making a living, they were willing to borrow money from the central government. The upper part was connected to the nostrils, the philtrum, and the lower part was the throat. The four points were clearly defined, and the two temples were divided. On the outside, there are real beards, and there are no adulterations. If they are not redeemed after the expiration date, they will be sold off every day and year, and the egg bags will be borrowed.

One person saw a spring painting and said, "This is not a spring painting, but a summer painting. Otherwise, why would you be naked? Another person said: "It's not a summer painting, it's a winter painting." "Why?" he asked. "The answer is: "Don't you see in every painting, everyone's beard is holding a frozen pen. "

The man who was pulling his kidney hair said to his beard: "I dreamed last night that you became an official, flag and umbrella deacon, and shouted in unison, so majestic. " Huzi was overjoyed. The other person said: "I scolded you in my dream, and you called Zaoli to come and beat me, but I grabbed your beard. Hu Hu said: "If you scold an officer, you should be beaten." What happened next? The man said, "I woke up right away. When I woke up, I still had a handful of egg hairs in my hand and wouldn't let go." ”N3[+R6r a;WE U Guanxiang Liangzhongshan