How to use humor to help communication?

On the road of life, there will always be some disappointments and some helplessness. Humor, a special emotional expression, can dilute people's negative emotions, eliminate depression and pain, let us find our own fantasies and self-confidence, get rid of embarrassing predicament, and let our mentality relax and rest under heavy pressure.

As the Russian writer Chekhov said, "People who don't know how to joke are hopeless." People with a sense of humor, life is full of fun, many seemingly painful and troublesome things, but they easily deal with them, making life interesting again.

Interpersonal relationships are relatively peaceful in most cases. Even if there are contradictions between people, no one wants to expose them and ask for trouble unless absolutely necessary. When interpersonal relationship is dull, if we want to make our thoughts and feelings closer, we might as well use humor, which may bring unexpected benefits.

Some people compare humor to "seasoning" in social interaction, which makes sense. In social situations, the most eye-catching people are often humorous people. They often make everyone laugh with their wit and humor. Everyone likes to be close to them, willing to chat with them and have fun. However, a person who keeps a straight face all day, or who is full of political jargon, finds it difficult to have good interpersonal relationships and many close friends.

You Fang in Qin Dynasty was a famous humorous figure. On one occasion, Qin Shihuang wanted to expand the imperial garden on a large scale and raise more rare birds and animals for his hunting and viewing. This is a waste of people and money, but none of the ministers dared to risk their lives to stop Qin Shihuang. At this time, the eloquent actor came forward. He said to Qin Shihuang, "Well, that's a good idea. Raise more rare birds and animals, and the enemy will not dare to come. Even if the enemy comes from the east, it is enough to order the deer to push them back with their horns. " After hearing this, Qin Shihuang smiled through tears and made an exception to withdraw the power of attorney. Swimming successfully persuaded Qin Shihuang, mainly with the help of humor.

Irony, on the one hand, saved himself; On the other hand, it prompted Qin Shihuang to wake up in laughter and achieve the purpose of persuading people.

Once, Lincoln spoke at a meeting of newspaper editors, pointing out that he was not an editor, so the number of people attending the meeting was very disproportionate.

In order to explain why he shouldn't attend the meeting, he told you a short story:

Once, I met a woman riding a horse in the forest. I stopped to make way, but she also stopped to stare at my face.

She said, "I believe you are the ugliest person I have ever met."

I said, "You may be right, but what can I do?"

She said, "Of course, you can't change this ugly face, but you may still stay at home!" "

Everyone laughed at Lincoln's humorous self-mockery.

Humorous people are hot. He must be kind and open-minded. Chaplin said: "I just want to win others' laughter with clever actions, and I will never use rude or vulgar actions." "What they say explains humor well. In other words, with a kind heart and smart wisdom, point out the inside story of the matter through your own words and let people see its absurdity. This is humor. It can be said that humor is an advanced art in social language and cannot be achieved overnight.

Former US President Wilson attended a luncheon hosted by new york Nanshe when he just became the governor of New Jersey. The chairman of the banquet introduced: "Wilson will be the future president of the United States." Of course, Mr. Chairman, it is impossible for you to have such a predictive ability. This is just a compliment.

So, with Wilson's praise, he boarded the platform. After a brief introduction, he said to everyone, "I hope I don't like the characters in the stories that others told me before." In Canada, a group of tourists were fishing by a stream, and one of them, Qiang Sen, got up the courage to drink some dangerous wine. He drank a lot of this wine, and then he and his companions were going to go back by train, but instead of going north by train, he went south by train. Therefore, his companions were anxious to find him back, so they sent a telegram to the conductor of CSR: "Please send a short man named Qiang Sen to CNR, he is drunk." Soon, they received a reply from the train conductor:' Please describe its characteristics in more detail. There are 13 drunken passengers on this train. They don't know their names and destinations. "And I, Wilson, although I know my name, I can't know exactly where my future destination is like you, Mr. Chairman." All the guests present burst into laughter, and the atmosphere of the banquet suddenly became happy and active.

On American radio, a man complained to a director that he was sad. The director listened and said to him, "Mr. Anthony, think about my situation." My best friend ran away with my wife. They have been running for more than a month. " Mr. Anthony, I think how sad my friend should be! "This is also a kind of humor. For a person, a sense of humor is also a measure to judge his wisdom and temperament.

1843, abraham lincoln, as a Republican candidate in Illinois, competed with Peter Cartwright of the Democratic Party for the state's congressional seat.

Cartwright is a famous priest. He seized a "small plait" of Lincoln, attacked Lincoln for not recognizing Jesus, and even slandered Jesus as an illegitimate child, which made Lincoln's prestige among voters plummet.

Once, Lincoln learned that Cartwright was going to preach in the church again, so he went into the church on time and sat in a conspicuous position piously for the priest to see. Cartwright thought it was possible to attack Lincoln again. Therefore, when the pastor's speech reached its climax, he suddenly said to his followers, "Those who are willing to give their hearts to God and want to go to heaven stand up!" " All the believers stood up. "Please sit down!" Cartwright continued to pray and said, "All those who don't want to go to hell stand up!" " "Of course, Christian Huo Ran stood up.

At this moment, the priest said to his followers, "I see that everyone is willing to give his heart to God and go to heaven. I see that except one person." The only exception is the famous Mr Lincoln, who didn't respond twice. Mr. Lincoln, where the hell are you going? "

At this time, Lincoln stood up calmly and said calmly to the voters, "I came here as an obedient listener." I didn't expect the Cartwright Brotherhood to call me by my name alone. This is a great honor. " I think: the questions raised by the Cartwright brothers are very important, but I feel that I can't answer them like others. He asked me directly where I was going, and I was willing to answer equally frankly: I was going to Congress. "

The people present were conquered by Lincoln's eloquent and witty language. Later, Lincoln successfully became a member of Congress.

Humor can make people laugh, but it is not a joke, it is a joke for the sake of a joke. Laughter produced by humor is based on solemnity and seriousness, which contains serious content. If it's vulgar teasing, it's not polite. Humor is not chatter, not selling gimmicks. The result of the "humorous method" of playing garrulous will only make people bored. Some people just want to add more happiness to others to show their eloquence and intelligence. But in any case, humor may hurt people, and its boundaries are intriguing. For jokes and humor, we must always remember the danger of hurting people, and be careful not to take a wrong step, otherwise one wrong step will lose everything, which is really not worth the candle.

In communication, to be good at using humorous skills requires some wisdom. It is difficult for an ignorant, frivolous and ignorant person to cultivate a sense of humor. Specifically, the conditions of humor should at least include the following aspects: extensive knowledge and profound social experience; Sharp insight and imagination; Noble and elegant demeanor and calm and confident, optimistic and relaxed mood; Good cultural accomplishment and language ability.

Humor is an art that reveals the contradiction of life through metaphor, suggestion and allegory, which is related to satire, but there are also differences. Some people say that satire is a pungent smile, and humor is a playful well-meaning smile.

Humor requires caution. Proper humor will make interpersonal relationships harmonious, while inappropriate humor will also worsen interpersonal relationships and lead to the failure of interpersonal communication. The emotional impact brought by decent humor has enough energy to eliminate misunderstandings and disputes between people. Therefore, humor is also an art of interpersonal communication with comic appeal and human touch.

Humor and open-mindedness can bring you confidence. As long as you work hard, this self-confidence can be applied to any other aspect, so that you can study and work with peace of mind. If you are confident in a particular thing, you can also be passionate and enthusiastic about yourself and other things.

Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, it is not easy to get rid of depression. In this case, the most effective way is to create a funny environment first. Unhappy feelings are often unconsciously lit up by reading humorous stories or cartoons, and of course, fighting spirit is also strong.

In modern life, people have higher and higher requirements for a sense of humor. Due to the high speed, high efficiency and fast pace of modern society, people are in a state of high tension at work, and their brains are prone to fatigue and need to relax after work. Therefore, more laughter and humor are needed to adjust their spirits, maintain emotional balance and promote the harmony of interpersonal relationships.