When she returned home after marriage, her mother complained, "We are not a family anymore. How dare you come back empty-handed? " What should we do?

Growth is a lesson that everyone must learn. Some people learn something, while others understand others. It is possible that when you grow up, you will find that some people and things you have always thought can actually be different.

Some looks, contrary to what you did before, can't meet your expectations. What should you do at this time?

Once, in the world of China, she always regarded her family as the most important part of her life, believing that it was stronger than friendship and more lasting than love. It is unbreakable and indestructible, and it is always with itself.

Hua also has a younger brother. She has had a good relationship with her brother since she was a child. Her mother often says to her, "Boys and girls are all the same, and we treat our sons and daughters equally."

Mother said so and did the same. Growing up, she and her brother were treated fairly in all aspects. Therefore, in China's view, there is no son preference in his family.

When did Hua begin to realize this change?

Probably after my brother graduated from college. Her mother often regrets that getting married after her brother graduated from college is not a small expense. I hope she can help him more in the future.

In China's mind, these are all necessary. If you are capable, brother and sister should help each other. That's understandable. She smiled and said that she was able to help in the future, and her mother smiled.

Later, my mother often complained to her and worried about many things about her brother. She was very helpless and advised her mother, "You have worked hard all your life, so don't always worry about it. My brother is not young. He knows how to take care of himself. "

Mother's tone suddenly became serious: "I only have one son. I don't care who he cares about?" At this moment, Hua realized that in her mother's heart, she and her brother were somewhat different after all.

02

Although their mother gave them the same treatment when they were young. But once something really happens, as a mother, her first reaction is to think of her son.

When she wanted to understand this, she felt a little sad, and then something even sadder appeared.

After every woman gets married, strictly speaking, she has three families, one is her maiden, the other is her husband's family, and the other is her own small family. Every family is important because they are an indispensable part of life.

But after marriage, Hua found his position in the family and became a little embarrassed. Only then did she understand that when she got married, the phrase "marry a daughter, splash water" in her father's mouth was no joke.

At first, she really thought her father was just talking. In her opinion, she is still the daughter of her parents after marriage and should come back as before, because they are a family.

But it never occurred to me that in the eyes of her parents, she has been a member of other people's families since she got married. "Other people's home" and "our home" are two different concepts.

And all this started after the dowry of 10 million yuan was taken out. From that moment on, her parents separated her from each other in their hearts. When they got married, their parents added a part of the bride price of 66,000 yuan, and collected a dowry of100,000 yuan and returned it to her.

This can also prove that parents love their daughters. But in life, after all, not all love can be as perfect as you think.

Going home in the future, she is a new identity.

03

Hua didn't realize this at first, because she didn't marry far away. After she got married, she often went back to her parents' house. At first, she would buy something for her parents by the way, but not every time.

Shopping is just a matter of course. You can buy some if you remember. Forget it if you can't remember it. Sometimes she is too lazy to carry it alone. Later, she simply returned empty-handed, which made her mother very unhappy.

Once back to her mother's house, her mother complained directly: "We are not a family anymore. How dare you come back empty-handed? "

Hearing this, she was shocked for the first time. She couldn't believe that this was from her mother. But when I looked at my mother, she looked as usual. Obviously, for my mother, this is as common as eating and sleeping.

During those few days at home, her mother was still talking and laughing as usual, but her heart was quietly changing. Mother briefly asked about married life and once again talked about her brother.

Mother is more worried about her brother than before and can't wait to help him arrange everything at once. At that time, her brother just bought a house, and the down payment was naturally from her parents. She also helped to look at the decoration, and she was as busy as worrying about her own business.

But later, when choosing furniture, there were differences. Her brother insisted on choosing the most expensive one. She felt it was unnecessary, so she told her brother a truth. Finally, her brother left angrily.

She was angry, too. She thought her brother didn't know how to treat his parents. She said to her mother, "mom, you spoil him so much that he is angry with me for such a trivial matter." He has to buy the most expensive one. "

Mother looked at her and said seriously, "this is our family's business, so don't worry about it in the future." You see your brother is unhappy again. " I only have one son, and I have to rely on him in the future. "

Hearing this, she suddenly remembered what her mother had said: "We are not a family anymore. How dare you come back empty-handed? " It turned out that in every way, her mother assigned her to another family.

04

After the daughter gets married, can't she get along with her family as before? Is it really "married daughter, spilled water"? I thought something eternal could really change?

I remember a good friend of mine once said something similar to me. Her parents also said something similar to her two daughters after they got married. She later gave birth to a child and wanted her mother to help her. Mother said, "It's not our grandson, let his grandmother take it."

Every time she goes home, she will definitely bring gifts to her parents and buy a lot of things in big bags and small bags. Her mother never said that she didn't have to buy anything. The only time she went back, she didn't buy anything, and her mother was a little unhappy.

But do you think her mother does not love them? No, her family conditions are average. Her parents have been working outside the home all their lives, no matter how hard they work, they still send their sister to college. When she married her sister, almost all her parents' life savings were used as a dowry.

It's just that her parents insist that her daughter is not a family when she gets married, so she didn't have those practices and statements until her daughter got married.

However, after he had a child, all the knots that Hua once had were completely untied.

At that time, she had not returned to her parents' home for a long time. The day before she went back, she was still wondering whether to give her mother money directly or buy something. When did she suddenly wake up? Since when did she acquiesce in her parents' thoughts?

Is affection still important to her? Yes, it is still important, but it is not as important as before. Because the arrow of love always shoots down, after having children, the focus of her life has completely shifted, thinking about her family, her husband and her children, and the number of times her parents appear in her heart is getting less and less.

Since then, every time she went back, she unconsciously classified herself as an outsider. Although she once said filial piety, she never did it again. Mom has been there before, so it doesn't mean anything. She knew that one day would come.

In fact, everyone's life is a journey away from their parents.