What should you do when you are unwilling to go to your husband's house when you have suffered a lot of grievances?

I have suffered a lot in my husband's family and don't want to go there again, so don't go.

The premise is that you can't prevent your husband from supporting the elderly or taking care of the elderly, as long as you don't prevent your husband from being a qualified son. As a daughter-in-law, you don't want to go to your husband's house, so don't go.

The rest of my life is not long, so why do you feel wronged for others?

Tell a true story, which is also the story that the daughter-in-law will never go to her husband's house again, and really will never enter her husband's house again.

When a couple fell in love, they were strongly opposed by their in-laws. They abused the girl, abused her parents, and urged her son to break up, crying two times and hanging three times.

But my son made up his mind and fell in love with this woman.

The girl also wanted to break up, but the man was adamant and got married later.

There is no wedding, no new house and nothing, so I have to live with my in-laws.

Mother-in-law called the girl cheap, backward-posted, shameless, and so on, and all the unbearable words were used on her daughter-in-law.

My daughter-in-law wanted a divorce, but my husband didn't want a divorce, so he moved out with his daughter-in-law very firmly.

The young couple rented a house to live in at first, but were afraid to have children. They worked hard for many years, paid the down payment, bought a house and gave birth to children.

During this period, my husband went home to visit his parents from time to time, and gave them gifts and money on holidays. My daughter-in-law never asked or interfered.

Later, my mother-in-law fell ill and was admitted to the hospital.

My husband has never asked his daughter-in-law to take care of his mother-in-law. He works alone during the day and takes care of his mother at night. He is very tired, but he has no complaints.

The son worked so hard, and the mother-in-law saw it in her eyes and felt pain in her heart. Then, the mother-in-law made a decision and asked her daughter-in-law to take care of her.

My mother-in-law called her daughter-in-law and said, I'm sick, and my son has to take care of me at work every day. It's too hard. I'm your mother-in-law, so it's only natural for a daughter-in-law to take care of her mother-in-law. Besides, do you have the heart to watch your husband work so hard? Don't you feel bad for him as a daughter-in-law?

The daughter-in-law listened to her mother-in-law silently and didn't respond to a word. After her mother-in-law finished speaking, the daughter-in-law hung up the phone.

The daughter-in-law didn't tell her husband about this phone call, and he was fine. Everything was as usual, and he continued to work during the day and take care of his mother at night.

the story is over.

What I want to say is that parents-in-law and daughter-in-law are equal in personality and should respect each other.

when the in-laws are too mean to the daughter-in-law, there is no need for the daughter-in-law to wronged herself.

after all, we are all independent people, and we can do what we should.

after

for a while, I also had great opinions about my husband-in-law.

it may be that the two generations have different ideas, and I have always been very clear about the degree of my mother-in-law's eccentricity. Therefore, many times, I am actually very wronged.

my mother-in-law takes care of my sister-in-law, but not me.

Mother-in-law is very kind to her sister-in-law. When she has a cold and is uncomfortable, her mother-in-law is very nervous. However, even if I don't feel well again, my mother-in-law doesn't ask.

My mother-in-law and sisters-in-law call very frequently, but they don't take the initiative to call me and my children for a month or a few months.

My mother-in-law told me personally that she chose the sister-in-law. If there is anything between husband and wife, let the sister-in-law come home and tell her, and she will take it out on her. However, she said that we talked about it ourselves, and if there is anything between us, we can solve it ourselves, and she doesn't care.

What's wrong with the child? My mother-in-law always blames me and the problems I take care of.

my husband and I quarreled, and every time we would say that it was my fault, it was all my fault.

.......

All kinds of things are piled up together. At first, I kept forbearing, and slowly, I couldn't help it. On one occasion, the opportunity broke out completely.

after that, I seldom go to my husband's house when nothing happens. And they may also know that I am not so easy to bully, and slowly, a little bit, I don't want to be like that anymore.

However, no matter what, on the important day, even if I don't feel happy in my heart, I will consider my husband's feelings and mood. During the Chinese New Year, I will definitely go back to my mother-in-law's house for one night and have a family reunion dinner. During the Chinese New Year, call your in-laws and say hello.

although, the old people have done something insufficient before.

although, before, the contradiction between our mother-in-law and daughter-in-law was once tense to the point of incompatibility.

but, no matter what, it is a family after all.

I won't hold grudges, nor will I interfere with my husband's filial piety to them, and I won't say anything about my husband's family in front of the children.

in my opinion, if you really feel wronged at your husband's house and don't want to go, you can just reduce the number of times you go. There is no need to completely wronged yourself. However, we, as daughters-in-law, can't do without some actions on the face. We can't let outsiders pick on us, saying that we don't know manners and so on.

no. I haven't been to my husband's house for more than ten years, including the Chinese New Year, since I moved out of the house with enough down payment, but I won't stop my husband and children from going back for the Chinese New Year. They are willing to go at any time. Every year, I eat casually by myself during the New Year, and I don't go back to my parents' home, and I don't bother my parents during the New Year. I will not instill any negative energy into my children about my grandparents. After all, no matter how they treat me, they are sincere to my children. I hope that my children will have light in their eyes and warmth in their hearts. Think about the helplessness of being bullied when she was young, her mother-in-law's completely different attitude towards her two daughters-in-law, and her character of embroidering scissors. Everything is sad, or choose out of sight, out of mind. When my husband's family comes to visit relatives, they usually eat in the hotel. I will deal with the scene and avoid direct contact with them. I have never called them again. I appreciate that in some western countries, daughters-in-law call their in-laws by their first names, so that they won't feel that their in-laws are called parents. China has a bad habit of calling their in-laws parents. Obviously, they are not a family, so they are stuck together. They are in trouble, and I will help them if I can. After all, they are my husband's parents. A few years ago, my husband's house was demolished, and this year I just have the conditions to take the initiative to buy them a new building of more than 1 square meters. Raising a pig also wants to see the benefits, let alone raising a son?

it's right not to go. I have a deep understanding of this issue.

I used to be a good wife, and I wronged myself to obey my in-laws' wishes. Often wronged, even in the husband's words of please and comfort in the past. There is no bride price, no wedding room, and even the wedding is organized by ourselves after seven or eight years of our own love. I am married far away. I am more tolerant of the two old people in my husband's family. I won't quarrel with them for seven or eight years. I am not cowardly, but my parents taught me not to do that since I was a child.

however, I will not get their kindness just because I am good. In-laws are old people who are too self-righteous and talkative. I've known each other for more than ten years, and I've never heard of anyone they approved. The pattern is small, and love takes advantage of small things. In short, getting along with each other will make people very popular.

Tell me a chilling thing. After I gave birth to my daughter by caesarean section and stayed in the hospital for four days, I originally wanted my mother-in-law to stay for more than ten days to help cook. As soon as I got back, she immediately said that when they gave birth to their children, they cooked by themselves. Which woman needed help like me? It is said that men should go out to earn money, and they should not stay in the house to see the baby wife these days. But where did she know the pain of my wound? Even when she got up, she moved her body to the bed first and then slowly rolled out of bed. Even so, she got up many times at night to help the baby wash her ass, change her diaper and feed her. Dad is slow and can't do this himself. I cried for five days after staying for seven days, and the food was perfunctory every day. It was not easy for me to eat four or five times a day in a month. In the morning, I had a bowl of mash and egg soup, and I didn't eat a dish and soup until three o'clock in the afternoon. Either there was a plastic bag in the soup or my hair was shredded. I think I can understand all this, and I may be careless. The saddest thing is that I say things that make me uncomfortable every day. I can't help it, so I said to the baby, if you leave your mother here again, I will hold the baby and jump off the building immediately to commit suicide. Dad sent his mother away desperately, because he wanted to rely on his mother to cook. After I left, I did everything by myself. I didn't do confinement. Everything was done by myself. I have suffered from postpartum depression, and I am exhausted, but I am glad that I can still live without them. If I had listened to their irritating words every day, I would have jumped off the building.

My daughter is one and a half years old now. They haven't taken a day and given a penny. One day half a year ago, my father and I had a few quarrels about trivial matters in life. His mother immediately came to help her son, scolded me and kicked me out. She also said that the baby was not born to me and that they spent hundreds of thousands on it. God ...

I can't go on, and I don't want to recall that terrible past. Just for the rest of my life, I will love myself more, and I will never see them again. I told dad that if you can't stand it because of me, we can get a divorce. Dad said he wouldn't divorce or force me to be nice to his parents. Accept it without meeting, after all, he has seen what his parents have done over the years.

I won't interfere with how the baby's father is filial to his parents. That's right. After all, sheep have the grace of kneeling on their mothers, and they can't change their parents, so they have to be tolerant. But I'll never be the silly me I used to be. It is compassion not to associate or complain.

To tell the truth, I don't want to see my mother-in-law again in my life. I really don't want to get in touch with her, and I don't want my children to be influenced by her wonderful three views, negative emotions and negative attitude towards life.

I think so. I will never let her touch my children when she is conscious, and I will not go to see her. If my husband is willing to go for the Chinese New Year Festival, he can accompany his parents for the Chinese New Year Festival, but I won't go, and my children are not allowed to go. Or my father-in-law can come and live with us if he wants, but my mother-in-law can't. In short, she can't contact my children when she has self-thinking and consciousness, especially before my children reach adulthood. As a mother, I have the right to protect my children from normal thinking and healthy psychology and positive attitude towards life. Of course, I also try not to provoke her, and I don't have an intersection with her! But if she doesn't have the thinking and consciousness to lie in the hospital bed and need someone to take care of her, I will help her husband share it, provided that her husband has always been good to me and my family! If my father-in-law keeps doing this, whether he helps us or not, as long as he doesn't want to be as wonderful as his mother-in-law, I will be filial with my husband.

I don't know what to do. In order to avoid conflicts, we didn't live together. My family bought the wedding room before marriage. After getting the certificate, my mother-in-law forced my husband to tell me to add his name to the real estate license or not to get married. I just can't stand it. I don't like it. It's a big deal to get a divorce. But his family didn't mention it later, and he got married. Later, I also had children, and my mother took care of them during pregnancy, regardless of their family. My mother-in-law never helps with the children or takes care of the baby. He also said sarcastically to me and my mother, who was always telling me what to do with the children. I used to buy things for her, and she was always dissatisfied. She always said that I was not as good as someone's daughter-in-law. Later, I stopped buying them, and I didn't have much contact with them. I know that some people's hearts will never be hot. We live separately, but close to each other. After marriage, my mother-in-law comes to interfere with our husband and wife's affairs every day, cooking for his son, washing his son's clothes, and even taking care of our husband and wife sleeping in separate beds. Usually, when he has nothing to do, he gossips about me everywhere, provoking his son to divorce me. (PS: I don't blame my mother-in-law, but I married a mother-in-law blindly. My grievances are all caused by my husband's inaction.) I don't know what to do. I moved to the unit for a while and let mother-in-law live with his mother as I wish. I am afraid that my child will be so young and unwilling to divorce, and I am afraid that he will grow up in a single-parent family. If you don't leave, you really don't have the courage to face this kind of chicken feather marriage.

After all, the mother-in-law is her husband's mother. She doesn't look at the Buddha's face without looking at it. Sometimes, for her husband's sake, she won't go once, but it can reduce the number of times and shorten the time. My husband also has a brother, and my sister-in-law is a teacher in a local school. She is a local, and I am a long-term married person, so I have no formal job. In life, my mother-in-law and I can't be unified, but before giving birth, there was nothing at home, and I didn't notice the difference between my mother-in-law and her two daughters-in-law. Every time my husband proposed to go back to her mother-in-law's house, I agreed. But after I got pregnant, I found the difference between my mother-in-law and her two daughters-in-law. Sister-in-law is a confinement, she serves, and she brings up the children. She reacted badly to morning sickness and wanted her mother-in-law to come and help, but she said she would look after the children for her sister-in-law. At that time, my sister-in-law's second child was over two years old, and my grandfather could watch it. Besides, I just said that I would come over for a while. After three months, the pregnancy reaction was small, and I could do it myself. The key is that my husband is not at home, but she still doesn't want to be busy watching the children for her sister-in-law. As for my child, she didn't show it for a day after she was born. Sometimes, when the child is ill, there are some things at home, and she wants to come over, she always has something to do. Of course, I naturally don't want to go to my mother-in-law's house again, which is normal. There's really nothing I can do but celebrate the New Year, but I won't stay too long. After the New Year's Day, this year will be over, and I must go back to my home.

just don't go, I don't want to see them all my life!

First of all, both our babies were delivered by caesarean section. (My mother-in-law died early) My mother-in-law didn't take care of her for a day, didn't take care of her children for a day, didn't buy anything for her children, and didn't even drink her water.

Secondly, in my father's terminal cancer, I took my children to the hospital to see my father, and my husband's family clearly knew (his son told him) that they didn't even say hello, let alone help pull the children. Even after my father died, my husband's family didn't help with the children.

Finally, just three months pregnant with Erbao, my husband's elder sister came to my house and forced me to say in front of me that Dabao's caesarean section cost money and suffered, and so on. I took her back directly, and then a few days later, the child was gone, which really killed her. She is ignorant and gave birth to a child with cerebral palsy, which means that I am not as good as her, a wonderful family!

So, people can only rely on themselves. They thought it was so difficult at the beginning, and they survived step by step, and their future life will only get better and better. As for them? Give them ten years. Ten years is less than twenty years. Look at them, Dont Ask For Help. Dare to expect me to try? In fact, in people's eyes, I am an outsider. Outsiders are outsiders, hoping to die of old age! ! Very good! ! !

don't go if you don't!

I always made up my mind not to go back in the future! However, I will still go back during the holidays, so that the family can live in harmony and not let outsiders see jokes, but I will be in a bad mood every time I come back, because when I see familiar people, I think of things I used to know. I am a person who bears grudges.