Matters needing attention in bringing children to family gatherings

At family gatherings, children always become the focus of amusement. Children who are willing to cooperate with the teasing of adults are praised for being generous and promising; On the contrary, if children are unwilling to cooperate and refuse to be amused in the way of adults, they will be called stingy and not as generous as their brothers and sisters. If there are many people, this kind of meaningless comparison is endless, and the children are completely unrecognizable by the unwarranted evaluation label, unable to find their own position, and completely lose patience and rationality. However, when children show anger or anger, instead of being comforted and apologized, they will be laughed at by adults or ridiculed for "being unable to stand teasing", "crying", "having a big temper" and "being impatient".

Xiao Bao was treated unfairly when he went to a party with relatives at the weekend. Xiaobao is playing with his little sister in a relative's house, and her sister's grandmother rises and asks her to recite poems. I joked, "Xiao Bao, you will, too. You should recite one." Xiaobao said he didn't want to recite it, so he ran away, leaving his sister to perform on her own. Who knows the grandmother was so happy that she said, "Look at how generous our baby is. You are still a brother, not as good as a sister ..." I couldn't listen to it anymore, and it was not appropriate to just shut her up. So I took Xiaobao to play, and said to him loudly, "You can say it if you want, or you can't say it if you don't want. It's all up to you." Xiao Bao laughed and ran to the balcony to see the car.

In this case, many times, parents are actually deeply concerned about their children, but they are embarrassed to stop them, for fear of hurting the harmony between relatives and friends. Compared with the unintentional comparison between relatives, it is the child's self-esteem that is more important. At this time, the child needs the protection of his parents more, especially when many people think that this is a joke and repeatedly tease the child. As a parent, they can't stand by. Yesterday, I took good care of Xiaobao. Although it was not perfect, at least I protected my child.

I have several suggestions for bringing children to family gatherings:

First, parents should put their children's safety first.

When relatives and friends get together, parents should definitely put their children first while chatting and having fun. The appearance of children in group gatherings is itself a vulnerable group, both physically and psychologically. Because of parents' neglect, there are no fewer cases of children's physical injuries, and similar situations will happen in the news every day. To put children first, we must pay attention to the whereabouts of children in the narrow and crowded space of the party, ensure that the children are in sight, and always in a safe environment, to prevent and control the danger caused by many people not paying attention to the children's condition.

when there are many family members, make sure that at least one person is dedicated to accompanying the children at a time. When there are many people, when one person leaves, he should communicate with each other to ensure that the other person knows his responsibility to stay and look after the children, so as to prevent two people from leaving without communication, leaving one child will lead to danger.

Second, pay attention to protecting children's psychological safety.

When friends and relatives get together, there is no limit to jokes. Children are the most vulnerable, and parents must be their umbrella. Adults always tease children unconsciously, and let them sing, dance or perform other forms of performances to entertain everyone. If children don't cooperate, they will be teased and provoked by all kinds. Children are sensitive and don't joke about it at that time. They are often at a loss in adults' jokes and begin to doubt themselves. Especially when multiple children are present, children will be compared with each other and attached with various labels, which is not insulting, but it is no exaggeration to say that they are sneering.

When faced with this situation, parents should stop such jokes and comparisons between relatives on the one hand, and don't be embarrassed. If you are really afraid of hurting the gas, you can take your child to avoid such a scene. At the same time, it is very clear to tell children that it is a joke between adults. Every child is different, and they all say their own ideas. Mom knows you and knows everything, but you have your own ideas, and mom appreciates you very much. Let children believe that having their own ideas is worthy of praise and encouragement, so that children can learn to be themselves firmly.

Conclusion:

Compared with the relationship between relatives and friends, children's psychology is absolutely important. A little generous communication between adults is believed to be able to understand each other's pains for children. If communication still leads to confusion, then such people don't associate. On the contrary, children, after unknown so was labeled with various labels, parents have to spend a lot of time and thoughts to let their children take off these labels. Who can guarantee that when they take off, they will not wear a belt and leave scars on their children?