If anyone can tell jokes and Russia can make the person I like laugh, I am willing to give all points.

1, the headmaster passed by the back door of the school and suddenly heard a sentence: "I want to take the Oxford exam!" " "The headmaster was very moved. I didn't expect such ambitious young people in the school. He decided to see who it was, and suddenly he heard another sentence: "Two more strings of big kidneys. "

Last night, I dreamed that the emperor gave me a concubine in the palace draft. Originally it was a happy thing, but looking at the title given by the emperor, I was not happy! Shouldn't the titles be graceful, graceful, princess and noble? But why did the emperor just pee on me?

3. The young man asked the Zen master, "I have a big dream. If it is realized, there will be no more disputes in this world. So I need a lot of money, master. Can you help me? " The Zen master took out a children's hat and a pair of children's gloves and put them on the young people. Then he asked, "How do you feel?" "Hands, head is a little tight." "Me too."

I can't sleep in the middle of the night. I got up and went to the living room for a cigarette. I found a cockroach and talked with it for a long time. I vented my views on life, my dissatisfaction with my boss, my pressure on life, and my squeeze on life. I ran out of cigarettes and trampled to death. There is no way, it knows too much.

5, Qinyuan spring heat flow temperature, steaming thousands of miles, braised Wan Li; Looking around the city, the sun is shining, and Park Avenue is basically burnt; Indoor sauna, sweat bath, lying is teppanyaki; On the street, suspender skirts are particularly enchanting; The temperature is so high that countless beautiful girls compete to show their waists; Colleges and universities, worried about air conditioning, have passed, but also count uncles and aunts, take a cattail leaf fan and laugh while fanning.

6. A four-year-old little cousin was playing alone in bed one day, and her father was watching TV by the bed ... Suddenly she accidentally fell off the bed, got up quickly, walked up to her father, decisively slapped her father and said, "What do you think of the child?"

7. A speeding car was stopped by the traffic police, who was about to issue a ticket. The driver pointed to the wife who was about to give birth and said, look, my wife is about to give birth! Just as the traffic police were about to let go, the driver added: Congratulations, my wife is pregnant with sextuplets! Hearing this, the traffic police immediately pulled out a ticket. The driver said gloomily, why should I be punished? The traffic police said: speeding+overcrowding+super life! ! !

Choose one by yourself! I hope I can win your girlfriend's smile.