My father has been dead for several years, and my mother wants to live with a dance partner she met from square dancing. What should you do?

After my father passed away, my mother met a dance partner through square dancing. I feel that this kind of acquaintance is not necessarily the person with the strongest relationship. They just got to know each other through dancing. If they just get together, is it a little too hasty? Does it make the children feel for this mother? Worry, so I think children must have this idea, because whether their mother can enjoy happiness in her later years is what children look forward to most. Therefore, children naturally have to consider carefully when dealing with their second marriage. Some. So if you disagree, you have a reason for it. I hope my mother will also observe and understand diligently, so that she can find a wife who has the same temperament as her and can live her life wholeheartedly.

Mom can fall in love with anyone, but don’t fall in love with an old man who dances in the square.

My neighbor, Sister Li, met a male dance teacher while dancing, and the two of them got close. Originally, someone was in charge of the male teacher’s beef noodles in the morning, but Sister Li was jealous, so she contracted the male teacher’s breakfast. .

Lunch is usually a meal for male teachers and female students. Later, it became a meal for two between Sister Li and the male teacher, with Sister Li footing the bill. Dinner and bed will just take their own course.

Sister Li has a problem. She likes to show off, especially her brother Ma. This male teacher has a straight back and raises his head to the sky. It feels so funny. Sister Li thinks So handsome.

Once, Sister Li took Teacher Ma to a class reunion. Most of the people Teacher Ma met were square dancing ladies, but what she saw at the party was different. Teacher Ma showed his true nature, chatted secretly and was kicked by others. Yes, but later I touched someone's butt and was slapped on the ear.

Someone said directly to Sister Li: Li Xiuying, you have to do it yourself from now on, don’t bring garbage people, we don’t welcome you.

This Sister Li is unsatisfactory. She is still obsessed with her Brother Ma. She also has to keep an eye on Brother Ma every day for fear of being secretly asked out by other dance partners. Her daily life is to pay and have sex with others. Endless heart.

These are the things Sister Li cried to us in person after she fell out of love. She cried hysterically, saying that Lao Ma was deceived and deceived by an old goblin. Later, after calming down, I realized that Teacher Ma's appetite was getting bigger and bigger. Not only did he pay for meals, drinks, and smoking, he also changed his clothes and bags. He wanted an iPhone. Sister Li had Xiao Jiujiu in her heart, and she spent all the money. Teacher Ma reconciled with his old sweetheart, Aunt Zhang. Aunt Zhang's retirement allowance was relatively high and she had a daughter abroad. She was older and fatter, but she was kinder to Teacher Ma.

So Sister Li was heartbroken and left the sailor dance circle in the park, so she came to us to cry.

I don’t know much about the various dance circles in the park because I don’t have any contact with them. Most of the news is that Sister Li talks about it as a joke in daily chats. She felt depressed after being deceived this time and told us. We didn’t know it at all when we were passionately in love in the early stage. .

In my eyes, those who dance in the square are all people in the arena. The water is too deep to fathom, so normal people should not step into the arena. There is a saying: If you come out to mess around, you will always have to pay back.

If you want to work for your mother, you can find someone who can live a normal life. Don’t find an old dancer. Live with your mother. Can you guarantee that you will only dance with your mother in the future?

There is a saying that goes like this: It’s going to rain and your mother wants to get married, so let her go. What does it mean? This is all natural and no one can stop it.

According to the information provided by the subject, the man is a man who has nothing but human beings. Since someone can rent a house, and your mother lets him live in your house to save money, is there any good solution? Zhou Yu hit the yellow cover and it was consensual.

However, you are still the owner of the house. You can communicate with your mother calmly, tell all your personal thoughts, and let your mother come up with her opinions and solutions to the problem. In this way, there are two results, and you must be mentally prepared.

First, your mother is a very strong person, and she doesn’t listen to you at all. She goes her own way, putting you in an embarrassing situation. This is a very annoying result.

Another situation is that your mother respects your opinion and rents a house with the old man. But there is a chance that the child will no longer help you take care of it. This may be an undesirable result, but it is common.

There is also the difficulty of your mother being cold. Even though you have moved out, your heart is still at home. She will use her free time to help you take care of the kids, which is the best outcome. As for your unwillingness to let her get along with that old man, it is both unreasonable and illegal. You can only let nature take its course to avoid making yourself uncomfortable. (2019/07/10)

Aunt Wang met Uncle Li during their marriage. The two had sparks while dancing in the square, and they both divorced and got together. Aunt Wang has a daughter, and Uncle Wang has a daughter. The sons are now married.

In the second year after Aunt Wang and Uncle Li got together, Uncle Li was semi-paralyzed due to cerebral infarction. Aunt Wang stopped dancing in the square and served Uncle Li at home. This service lasted for fifteen years. Year. The two abandoned their original families and came together. They should cherish each other, but in fact they both have selfish motives and do not trust each other. Aunt Wang felt that Uncle Li always secretly gave money to his son who was not doing his job properly and did not spend it on himself. Wang Auntie can't go out for too long, otherwise Uncle Li will ask her where she went when she comes home, and a quarrel will ensue. Therefore, Auntie Wang can only eat with her friends near home, and her friends have to prove on the phone that Auntie Wang is with them. together.

Aunt Wang said that she was very tired and wanted a divorce, but Uncle Li disagreed and continued to live like this.

I have also seen some videos in which adults and aunts who dance square dance show no self-respect or self-love in front of everyone, which makes people doubt the starting point of modern square dance. Of course, this kind of negative energy is still a minority.

Let’s go back to the question. Dad passed away many times. It’s understandable for mom to find another partner. As long as mom thinks clearly, as a child, she should support her. Now you should support mom, but you just have doubts. To put it bluntly, I just don’t feel at ease. The house you live in has been transferred to your name. Don't worry about this. You are just worried that he has little income and is living with your mother because he wants to enjoy life. And you feel that he is just an outsider from the bottom of your heart, which is true. As an outsider, how can we get rid of this feeling of rejection? Here are some suggestions:

Taking all things into consideration, I think you can secretly observe the behavior of your mother’s dance partner to see if she is sincerely with her. Use appropriate protocols to protect your mother and your home. Of course, I hope the result is good, otherwise my mother will be so sad.

That’s good. The elderly have their own lives, especially if they can find someone to live with, which makes it much easier for their children.

You are very lucky. My mother-in-law has been single since the death of my father-in-law, living alone, and her personality has become more and more eccentric. For many years, my wife has been spending two days with her every weekend, but she still She is not satisfied and tortures my wife until she wants to die. There is nothing we can do. What should we do if we plan to send her to a nursing home? Support! Are you willing to watch your mother live alone for the rest of her life? Do you think you can stay with her for the rest of your life without doing anything? If you can't do that, don't dwell on this issue anymore. In order for my mother to spend the rest of her life happily, and to have a partner who can take care of her. If you don't take the initiative to propose marriage to her, then forget about it. Now that she has found someone she likes, just support her! Bless her!

Doing this will make your mother happy and solve your worries. Why not do it? What is filial piety? Your mother has raised you up. As long as it is something she is willing to do, as long as it is something she is happy with, you should follow her and support her. This is called filial piety. There are many remarried old people around me who are living a very good and happy life. When you are so old, you can't just think about yourself and ignore the elderly. Can you stay with your mother all the time? Can you eat three meals a day with her? Isn’t it good for children to have their children’s lives, and for the elderly to have their own lives?

In fact, many children disagree. Most of them are not because they feel embarrassed at such an old age (after all, we are in this era) but because they have their own little Jiujiu in their hearts. For example, support issues, inheritance issues, children's issues, etc.

Let’s talk about support first. It is only natural that children should support the elderly. Don’t you have to support your biological father while he’s alive? If someone takes your biological father’s place to accompany your mother, it’s no loss to you, right? Are you glad that your father's early death gave you peace of mind? If not, then you haven’t paid much more, and you’ve even saved yourself a lot of trouble. Shouldn't you be grateful for people's willingness to take care of your mother? Old people are not as busy as young people, and they can easily feel lonely. Filial children should encourage the elderly to seek remarriage instead of becoming a stumbling block for them to remarry.

Regarding the issue of inheritance, in fact, what I despise the most is those who control the private lives of the elderly because they are afraid that others will divide the inheritance! The old man raised you because of his kindness. You have hands and feet, and even after you have started a family, you still care about the wealth that the old man has accumulated throughout his life? The old man can give money to whomever he likes, why should you worry about it? If your parents would rather give money to others than to their children, do you want to reflect on why? Some parents are not close to their children, or are partial to them. I think this is not a problem. The real problem is that you think you have the right to control your parents. Why? Do you love them for the money? If they don't give you money, will you feel unbalanced and feel like you don't need to be filial to your parents? What a ridiculous and selfish idea. The family relationship between you and your parents has existed since they raised you. Your parents' kindness will never end in your lifetime. Isn't it appropriate for you to think about scratching something again?

Regarding the issue of children, there is no reason for the elderly to help you take care of your children after raising you. Every generation has its own hardships and must shoulder its own burden. Don’t rely on your parents for everything and will die if you don’t take advantage of them. It’s not over. Nowadays, there are still people who say that if you don’t help take care of the children, you won’t be able to provide for the elderly, and that’s all! The old man has worked hard all his life. Helping you is a matter of friendship, and not helping you is also a duty. Could it be that the old man was born to serve you? In that case, why not just give birth and sell it to subsidize yourself?

From the above, I think children should not interfere too much in the lives of the elderly. Their choices have no interest in you. On the other hand, why would an old man choose to live together instead of getting married? Aren't you afraid that your children will make noises and others will share your money? Afraid of extra responsibility? At this time, children should not put pressure on the elderly, but should be more responsible for their parents. After all, a scumbag will become an old scumbag when he gets old, and green tea will become an old green tea when he gets old. Those who run for money and houses should clearly tell the old man that children do not want this, but they cannot let the old man be deceived and lose both his life and property. If you can really treat the old man well, these are nothing. Perhaps, the old man would rather trade these for having a companion in his old age. Just like Su Daqiang. If you explain the situation clearly to him, they will know that you do not object to their remarriage, so they will naturally be careful about the capital in their hands.

Forgive me for telling the truth: I have retired and have children, why do I still need to find a so-called "dance partner" to live together? Are you worthy of the father or mother of a child who has worked hard all his life to build a family? (Unless it was due to domestic violence during his lifetime) Otherwise: I (only personal opinion) think that it is disrespectful to the elderly and a prodigal for the sake of the elderly. No wonder it is resented and hated by the younger generations! Don’t you feel ashamed of such a parent? A parent who makes his child lose face outside is not a good parent?! For the sake of one's own romance and dissoluteness, one would not hesitate to harm the deceased (husband or wife). It is difficult to say: Dog man makes love with dog girl! No good results! (Personal opinion) Don’t squirt

First of all, give your mother a suggestion whether you really love this dance partner. Second, you must carefully understand whether this dance partner truly loves your mother. If he truly loves your mother, he will be in good health and his children will support him. You should also strongly support them in registering their marriage. rather than living together. Because people are getting older and have some inconveniences in life, wouldn't it be better if we had a partner to take care of each other, support each other, be considerate to each other, and bring each other water and medicine when we are sick? If your children are filial, can you cultivate them by their side every day? It's night. What is filial piety? Those who obey are filial piety, and those who respect are filial piety. After my mother passed away, I encouraged my father to find another partner. Because I know very well how lonely he is, and we, the children, can’t keep him company every day. It would be so much fun for the two of us to talk to him if he has someone to keep him company. My mother will also be happy in heaven.

You think this matter should be viewed rationally.

First of all, your father has passed away several years ago, and your mother has the right to pursue a happy life in her later years. Judging from your description, your mother's dance partner lives in a nursing home and wants to rent a house to live with your mother after meeting her. Judging from his thoughts, he really wants to have a good life with your mother. Since you really want to be with your mother, let him go through the marriage formalities with your mother. This will look more formal for an old man, and your mother won't have to endure the judgment of her neighbors.

Secondly, when it comes to renting a house, your mother chose to bring her dancing partner home to live instead of living outside. As we all know, living in your own house is definitely more comfortable than renting a house outside. From your description, This house was bought when your father was still alive. Now the house has been transferred to your name. You don't want the two of them to live in it.

I think you can make it clear to your mother about this. Your mother doesn’t necessarily want to live in this house. She just wants to live better. I think you can definitely contribute part of the money after they get married. They rent houses with better conditions.

Finally, for this kind of "twilight love", we have to keep a check on the elderly. If we find that the other person is really good after a period of investigation, we will take some measures. We cannot go out to "live together" and fall in love just after knowing each other for a few days. The IQ of women in love is almost zero. We want our mothers to enjoy the joy of love, but we also need to take preventive measures in advance.

Your mother is a dance enthusiast and developed feelings for her dance partner during dance. When it comes to living together, if the other person is single and has positive energy, the children should support it. Don't think that dancers are not good people. On the contrary, dancers are people who pursue life, love life, are loyal to their feelings, and are responsible.

As you get older, although your children may sometimes be taken care of at home, they cannot always be with you. When a person calms down, a desolate feeling of loneliness will arise. Living people cannot live in the shadow of the deceased and have the right to pursue marital happiness. Since your mother feels happy and blessed to have found the other half of her life, as a child, I am happy to bless them! Old concepts must be eradicated and new concepts must be promoted.

I am also a dance lover, and I have seen many such situations with my own eyes. Some are both single, and some are single. The situations are different. After forming a family, life is quite good. Guan Jian’s is She and the others have the same hobbies and the same words! Life becomes more joyful and relationships develop. Dancing in the morning and evening, writing poems and paintings during the day, singing and practicing dancing, isn't this kind of life what they yearn for and pursue?

I have a female apprentice. I brought her into the dance circle. She has a boyfriend and we live together. They have different interests and hobbies, and they often quarrel with each other. After dancing, I made a friend. Male dance partners, as in the case of your mother's appeal, they came together. They have lived a very good life since they got together, and their relationship is also quite good. Their life is very happy! They thanked me and said, thanks to you teaching me to dance, I have a good life today, which makes me full of hope and future for life. I hope your mother will be so happy and joyful.

I originally wanted you to tell your mother and the old man to go out and rent a house, but if you look carefully, your mother still has to babysit the child for you. The old man is also helping. You are really blinded when they leave. Oh, if you want to be more open-minded, let’s just think of finding an old man to babysit for free!

It doesn’t matter if one is willing to fight or suffer in this kind of thing. You hate the old man. It’s very honest. Who likes this kind of person? What’s more, it’s your mother’s “new love” who suddenly comes to live in your house. And, let’s be clear, he has no income, so you feel disgusted in your heart.

However, there is no way, it is going to rain and my mother wants to get married.

Now that things have happened, don’t complain, think on the bright side, his appearance,

First, it solves your mother’s loneliness problem for many years

Second, he may also be helping with housework and taking care of the children.

There is no other way, just make do with it. In a few years, when the children grow up, you can let them go out to rent a house. I hope that by then, the two old people can still get along with each other! (Maybe you don’t have to worry about it, they will just leave as they say, more casually than young people.)