What funny jokes have you heard?

Xiao Ming: "Didn't you say you broke up with me? Why did you write to me? " Girlfriend: "I tell you, I'm in love with that postman, so I can't help dating."

Watching time in bed every morning is not to get up, but to see how long you can sleep. No matter what dog I am admitted to, I believe I have a bright future. When God closes a door for you, he will also use it to clamp your brain.

Don't stare at people all the time, and then it's time to buy tickets. People can't afford monkeys in the zoo! Also, look at your appearance. I vomited gastric juice the year before last. I said, that slimming shop must make money. What a dedicated face!

Is money important? When you are hungry for three days, I will give you one million yuan and a steamed bread. What do you choose? I choose1000000, and then I take out a dollar to buy steamed bread!

Let me tell you something. I met a fortune teller that day. He said I had bad luck this year, but there is a solution, that is, telling a fool can eliminate the disaster, so I sent it to you.