New funny jokes about tucao exam

lead: why do you come to the exam when you don't even know who calculus is? That's the king who is famous all over the school! The following are more funny jokes I brought in the new Tucao exam in 217. Welcome to read and pay attention.

1. My son came home trembling: Dad, I only got sixty points in today's exam. ? Dad is very angry: Don't call me dad if you fail the exam next time! ? After three weeks, my son came back from the exam, and my father asked: How was the exam this time? The son looked helpless:? Sorry, brother. ?

2. Every time the teacher says:? Please put things unrelated to the exam on the platform. ? I really want to put myself on the podium?

3. The whole semester was completely abandoned, and I was heartbroken when I approached the exam. I didn't sleep for a week. I was all in my back before the exam. When I walked into the examination room, I collapsed. When I got the paper, I cried. I didn't take the exam, and I didn't know anything.

4. It's obviously a pad-sized exam, but it has a wide range of daily exams, which requires students to review in an extended way at night. But even so, it will still leak sideways.

5. A netizen took the IELTS test, and then in the oral test session, she habitually said a sentence when she got the oral presentation question? **? . As a result, the examiner knew a little Chinese, so he asked her what she meant. She said HLL. Day? China people use the power of the sun to motivate themselves.

6. The furthest distance in the world is not between life and death, but the exam is coming soon. Others are reviewing, but they are previewing, and some unconsciously are knitting scarves.

7. The wind is blowing in cloud flying, and the valiant soldier is walking everywhere! The exam must be cancelled at any time! Not without cancellation. Think about it, you went home, followed your classmates, ate hot pot and sang songs, and suddenly told you that you failed? So the day without exams is a good day! !

8. Exams are breathing pains. They live in all corners of my body. It hurts to occupy a seat, it hurts to not occupy a seat, and it hurts even to sleep. Examination is a pain that can breathe. It rolls back and forth in the blood. It hurts to regret not reviewing, it hurts to hate not reviewing, and it hurts the most if you want to read or not.

9. I was unhappy when I started reviewing. If I was unhappy, I stopped reviewing. If I didn't review, I was happy. If I was happy, the day passed?

1. I watched it in the morning, but I forgot it in the afternoon. I watched it in the afternoon and forgot it at night. I forgot one door after reading it. Is there another door after reading it?

11. When I read Cell, I died. See "Blood", no circulation; Watching Breath, my lungs are not dilated; See "Digestion", more stomach acid; Watching Energy, I collapsed; Watching "Excretion", my urine collapsed; Looking at Feeling, I am numb; Look at "Nerve", I am confused; Look at Endocrine, I am out of tune; God! Candidates are reasonable, just sick?

12. It's fate to read one question and test another. It's luck to get one question right; Horizontal batch: it is useless to do more. Reading one book a day is efficient; Take an examination of a door, strength; Horizontal approval: sudden success.

13. In fact, the college entrance examination is not terrible at all. After reviewing for a year, all the exams are good. The university is terrible, only one week, and all the things you can't test are ~~

14. There is a test range called? You have to take the whole book? There is an exam that focuses on? What I said was the point? My heart sank after listening to the first sentence, and my eyes were filled with tears after listening to the second sentence? Those teachers who didn't focus on the whole book were all broken-winged angels and girls in their last lives. If you meet a teacher who focuses on it, marry him.

Please be sure to indicate the source and connection when reprinting! Shangzhichao. com _shangc.net website: Tucao Final Exam Piece Tucao Exam Quotations Funny _ Shangzhichao/a/59211.html # ixzz4f8 DFDTBH

15. There is a kind of fill-in-the-blank question called not knowing at all, a kind of multiple-choice question called looking right, a kind of calculation question called crying while doing, an application question called getting up and crashing, and a kind of proof question called proving your sister. There is a kind of failing class called it doesn't matter!

16. A month ago, I asked the Buddha what to do. The Buddha gave me four words: Everything depends on human effort; Half a month ago, I asked the Buddha again, and the Buddha gave me four words: Everything goes with fate; Today, I asked the Buddha again. After a long silence, the Buddha said, I will give you four more words: Focus on participation ~ < P > 17. There is a kind of question called: This knowledge point, I may take multiple-choice questions, noun explanations, short-answer questions and essay questions. Direct blood spray macro?

18, the exam, I wish I were Xu Chu, give twice the score for a question; I hope I am Lu Bu, and one point will be deducted for two wrong questions; I hope it's me, Guo Jia. Give me the answers to two questions if I make a mistake. I hope I am Liu Bei, and my classmates can help me with my problems. I hope I am Sima Yi, and I will do it right if I say it right. I hope it's Xiao Qiao, and the wrong deduction is someone else's score; I hope I am Zhuge Liang most, knowing the exam questions in advance, and you can't deduct my points without reviewing them!

19, 1% of the key points are in your hand, and 9% of the questions are in the college building!

2. Why come to the exam when you don't even know who calculus is? That's the king who is famous all over the school!

21. In the Chinese exam in primary school, what is the first half of the blank question? The mountain said to the sea: You are so broad! So vast! Such passion! So surging! The sea said to the mountain: (). A classmate wrote on the test paper: (Thank you for your compliment! )。 The marking teacher burst into tears?

22. It is said that the Chinese Proficiency Test is one of the three major BT tests in the world. Although the speaking speed is slow, the content is really good? Example: Listen to a short dialogue. The man said: Hey, your teeth are so white today. The woman said: that's a false tooth; The man said: Really? Woman: Really? Question: Is this a real tooth or a false tooth?

23. A teacher stutters when he is nervous. During an invigilation, he found a classmate cheating. He angrily pointed at the cheating student and shouted:? You? You? You? You? You? You? You? You? How dare you cheat? Get up! ! ? After that, nine students stood up.

24. The final exam is said to be far away. I hope that students will take surprise attacks as the main task, supplemented by cheating: take the policy of teachers entering and hiding, teachers withdrawing and copying, and circuitous operations!

send you a couplet: if you don't cheat in the exam, you'd rather be a junior next year than fail without personality. Horizontal criticism: I have to die.

the necessary skills for the exam: the shortest choice is three long and one short; Three short and one long choose the longest; Choose b for different lengths; Choose d if it is uneven.

take copying as the main task, supplemented by Mongolia, and combine Mongolia with copying, and you will definitely pass!

25. In college, the invigilator found the cheat sheet in the final exam. Immediately put the cheat sheet in your pocket, and the exam came over and said, take out your things. I accidentally took out the 1 yuan in my pocket, and the invigilator was stunned. Smiled, took a hundred dollars, and left me in a mess in the wind

26. In a political exam in high school, a boy in the last row spread his textbook on his lap, only to find that the invigilator quietly went around behind him and touched his shoulder like a horse. The student was shocked, and his face remained unchanged. He said, Sorry, there are too many things in the table to put down, so he had to stay on his lap. Then he bowed his head and continued to write ill books. The whole class fainted.

27, high school students found that the title was ambiguous when copying books, so they took the textbook and the teacher's theory. It took the teacher three minutes to react and sighed.

28. In junior high school, the female classmate next door threw the book on the ground in a biology exam and turned it over with her toes. I have always admired her eyesight and the flexibility of her toes.

29. One of my classmates took an English test in college. He bought a box of embroidery needles, and then carved the contents of the test on the desk in advance (our desk is the kind of shiny hard board). You can't see it when you look directly at it, but you can only see it when you look sideways. He carved all afternoon, blunted n needles, and finally his hands became numb, and then he threw a book to occupy a seat on the table. I think that desk will be seized by younger brothers and sisters in the future.

3. The most profitable time for me was that I didn't prepare anything and thought I was going to die! I have already prepared the repair fee! Come to the examination room and sit in a daze! As a result, the invigilator asked everyone to change seats, so I went to the new seat and took a look. Wow, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! All the answers are copied on the table, and they are all copied! Looking around, I found a brother staring at me with fiery eyes, hahahaha, and the course passed smoothly!

31. I once dreamed that I was taking an exam, which scared me to death. When I woke up, I found that I was really taking an exam!

32. An expert slept all the time during the exam, then woke up at the end of the exam. He looked around and found that the students behind him had finished their papers and had not written their names, so he took them and handed them in with his own names?

33. During the exam, the teacher came to me and asked me:? You guys? Is the teacher all right? I actually answered him:? Not bad. ? As a result, a demerit.

34. Two classmates look alike! The physics exam lasted for 65 minutes, and one person handed in the paper. Then, one person went to wc, and the person who handed in the paper continued to come in for the exam!

35. When Wenquxing was being used in the exam, suddenly the alarm clock on it rang. Is it cold? I also woke up the teacher who was sleeping soundly. Beaten up by your brothers after the exam?

36. At the end of the exam, a strongman was there watching the invigilator giggle. The teacher came over and asked: How was the exam? Not bad, huh? His classmate replied: I don't know how the exam went. You have to ask me the one in front.

38. Tell me about our classmates' cheating experience. The teacher will draw a range before the exam, but the range is relatively wide, so the students will type all the contents in Word, and then reduce the proportion of printing and print it out (the exact proportion is not clear). The contents of a piece of A4 paper are printed on a piece of paper about the size of half a cigarette box. Then cut out the typed content, and then stick the first page and the second page back to back. Generally, there are no more than 4 pieces of double-sided paper in a class. This is suitable for reading in cuffs in winter. The other is suitable for summer use. The classmate is a girl, and she wears a skirt of medium length on the day of the exam. It is still the above small note, which is stuck on the side of the reverse side of the skirt. Just turn the skirt over a little during the exam, and I admire it. But in fact, the invigilator's teacher still knew what she was doing, so once when she was in the middle of the exam, a teacher came up behind her and patted her on the shoulder and said, Okay, okay, just pass the exam, okay? . It's really cold!

38. I finished the final exam in junior high school 4 minutes in advance, so I was really bored. I stuffed my head into my desk to play, but I couldn't pull it out. Later, with the help of my teacher, I finally pulled it out and handed it in?

39. If you have an open-book exam one night, you can read books instead of inviting people. A comrade wants to date his girlfriend at night and find someone temporarily. This buddy was reading Wang Shuo's book, put the information in the book and went to the examination room. The invigilator is a newly graduated female teacher. When I saw this buddy, I wanted to have a look at his face. Of course, my buddy bowed his head fiercely. The female teacher did not obey, bent down, and the elder brothers bowed their heads and turned over the books. Just turn to "I am a rogue who am I afraid of", and the female teacher is scared back. Later, I didn't want to be reconciled. I went to see it again when I handed in the paper quickly. My buddy bowed his head and turned over the book, "I don't love someone."