What jokes do girls like to listen to? Can you say a few?

On the last bus, a woman in white sat in the last row. The driver looked in the rearview mirror, and the woman was gone, shocked! Suddenly braking, people sitting there. Keep driving and look in the rearview mirror. The woman is gone. Brake back. The woman is now. Keep driving, look in the rearview mirror, and no more women! Suddenly, the woman with messy hair and blood all over her face came up slowly and whispered, "Do I have a grudge against you?"? As soon as you tie your shoelaces, you slam on the brakes ...

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Lao Zhang went shopping for food, and it was a bit slow to pay. The vegetable seller urged him: hurry up, big brother, the city manager will come soon, and my food is gone. Lao Zhang said, nonsense, I don't want to rush? If I go back late, I may lose my house! …………

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Eat rice noodles at noon. There are several kinds of rice noodles in the shop, ordinary 4 yuan, crossing the bridge rice noodles 10 yuan ... only a few are talking. Man: "I don't understand why crossing the bridge rice noodles is so expensive." More expensive than ordinary, 6 yuan? "Woman:" I don't know, maybe this 10 yuan includes the toll! " "

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Once, the boss of a communication company went to the public toilet. The old man at the door said: 30 cents in and 20 cents out. Learn from you, two-way charge. After the boss came out, he was stopped again: you squat in pit 8 and pay a one-yuan number selection fee; Fart, pay one yuan roaming fee, and pay one yuan overtime fee for more than three minutes; There is background music in the toilet. Spend 20 cents on color ring tones. The boss was furious: Who made this rule? Grandpa: I am in charge of my website!

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It is said that Tang Zhongzong Li Xian is the most awesome emperor in history. Why? Because he is the emperor, his father is the emperor, his brother is the emperor, his son is the emperor, his nephew is the emperor, not to mention his mother is the emperor. So history gave him a glorious name: Liuhuang Pill!

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Xiao Wang and Xiao Li want to attend an interview. Xiao Li had some listening problems, so he asked Xiao Wang to copy his interview answers, and Xiao Wang agreed.

Examiner: Who do you like best in The Journey to the West?

Xiao Wang: It used to be Wukong, but now it's Bajie.

Examiner: Do you think there are aliens in the world?

Xiao Wang: Although scientists have not confirmed it, I think so.

Examiner: OK, you are accepted.

It's Xiaoli's turn Examiner: What's your name?

Xiaoli: I used to be Wukong, but now I am Bajie.

Examiner: Are you sick?

Xiao Li: Although scientists have not confirmed it, I think so.

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Xiaoming's first day at school. After school, his father asked: Where does the river flow?

Xiaoming sings: The river flows eastward.

Dad asked again: How many stars are there in the sky?

Xiaoming sings: The stars in the sky join Beidou.

Dad was very angry and said, I want to hit you!

Xiao Ming sings: Do it when you should.

Dad: Get out!

Xiao Ming sings: Go as you say.

Dad: Are you sick?

Xiao Ming sings: You have everything I have!

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Aunt He said to his wife, "Uncle Han, the neighbor, named his grandson Han, and Uncle Gao named his grandson Gaoke. We will have grandchildren soon. Why not give him a loud name? "

Without thinking, Uncle He said, "Just call it a weapon!"