Humorous and meaningful jokes

1. A friend went to a restaurant to eat. He asked the boss: Is your restaurant hygienic and environmentally friendly? The shop owner said: Don’t worry, it’s absolutely environmentally friendly, even our cooking oil is recycled!

2. Last night, my daughter brought her boyfriend to our house for dinner for the first time. I got him drunk when I was happy. I didn’t expect that this guy had a bad ability to drink and taste bad wine. When he was drunk, he secretly told me Take me to find the young lady. I’m still very angry when I think about it now. How could my daughter fall in love with such a man who doesn’t mean what he says?

3. Me: Honey, do you like me more ladylike? Or be more coquettish? Boyfriend: I just hope you can be like my ex-girlfriend who can give in obscurity. Me: Are you still ex-girlfriend? Why didn’t I know! Boyfriend: It’s inflatable, just throw it away after use. She never complains.

4. A man slept with a girl who had a boyfriend. The girl asked the man why he didn’t marry her? A certain man replied: I've gone too far by stealing other people's food. Do I have to take away other people's pots as well?

5. A relative got married today, and my husband went to attend the wedding. He sent me a photo, and I replied with four words: The cabbage is good. . . Husband: Pigs are quite fat too! Hey, come on, when did the communication between the two of us become so meaningful?

6. There is nothing to ask about things like height, as everyone is over one meter; there is nothing to ask about things like weight, as everyone is under 200 kilograms; there is nothing to ask about things like salary, as everyone is under 200 kilograms; There’s nothing to ask about if you don’t have enough money.

7. This broadcast of gymnastics is too fake. Girls have been doing breast enlargement exercises for more than ten years, but it has no effect at all~

8. When we were on a blind date, I asked: Are you What does the man do: I make indoor light control equipment. I thought it was some kind of high technology, and I was afraid that people would think I didn’t understand anything, so I was too embarrassed to ask, but I felt very happy. Later I found out that his sister was a curtain seller. . .

9. I went to the public toilet and found a girl inside. . . After staying for a few seconds, I quickly backed out. Think about it again, that’s not right! Without saying sorry, I walked in again. . .

10. I went on a blind date with my friend. As soon as we sat down, he sneezed heavily. Just when I was embarrassed that this was a very impolite greeting, I saw my colleague silently raised his head and said: Sorry, I am allergic to beauty. I couldn't hold it back. I admire it, it's so clever.

11. When I was chatting with my bestie, I said that for the sake of my next generation, I had to find a handsome guy to get married to. As a result, the second-rate guy said that the handsome guy will not marry you for the sake of his next generation.

12. In the coffee shop, he sat quietly opposite me, carefully tasting a cup of cappuccino. He was so dazzling that he attracted the attention of everyone. After all, I still I couldn't hold it back and said to him cautiously: I remember I just saw you at the corner of the street. He stared at me with a smile on his face: "I'm tired from work, let's relax." I was speechless and choked up after hearing this. After all, there are not many such literary beggars nowadays. . . Never expected that!

13. After my mother found out about the affair with my boyfriend, my aunt locked her boyfriend in the house and refused to allow me to see him. I begged outside the door, and my aunt said from behind the door: You go back, I only have this son. Me: Auntie, if we stay together, you will have two sons. . .

14. A friend loved to show off his wealth. One day he invited me to dinner and said, "I don't need anything like a house, a car, and savings. I don't even know what to bring for my wife." At this time, a girl next to me said quietly: You can ask her to take care of a child for you!

15. It is said that if you meet an old lady, it is a good idea to fall to the ground with her. You can pull her down, now the old lady is relying on me, saying that I slept with him. I have to take full responsibility. . . . . . I hate you guys who come up with blind ideas! ! !

16. Mom, it’s all your fault for not letting me fall in love early. Now I can’t even find a partner! This is the reason why you are not allowed to fall in love prematurely, otherwise you would have known that you would not find it.

17. Female: Honey, do you think my breasts are big? Man: Yeah! Like two landmines! Woman: Disgusting! The Lun family is actually not that big! Man: Yeah! Buried in the ground!

18. A brother said that his wife ran away with a man. He was very sad and asked me to invite him to the bar. After comforting him for a long time in the bar, I realized that it was just his wife who had taken her son back to her parents' home.

Damn it! Who are these people!

Nineteen. A woman held a knife and said to her boyfriend in tears: You actually asked me to do such a thing. We have been together since college, and it has been two years now. You are worthy of me. ? Ah, dear, stop making trouble. I just cut an onion. Is it necessary? If not, I'll do it

20. Today I went shopping with a goddess I've had a crush on for a long time. When I saw my second-rate friend, I went up to say hello. When he saw us, he asked me: This is your girlfriend. I went up and slapped you: Who told you to spoil it!

21. I have never known what I should be good at since I was a child. I had no choice but to fully develop my moral, intellectual, physical, artistic and physical skills. The most connotative classic humorous sentences. Super connotative humorous jokes

The most connotative classic humorous sentences

1. People are not afraid of death, but they are most afraid of not knowing how to live

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2. Life is nothing more than making others smile, and occasionally making others laugh

3. If one day I disappear, there are only two possibilities: the body is traveling, or the soul is traveling.

4. Life is colorful, but I also have my own colors.

5. Although you are restless, you should keep yourself safe.

6. The true meaning of an iron rice bowl is not to have food in one place, but to have food wherever you go throughout your life.

7. Stealing someone’s ideas is plagiarism. Steal a lot. People's idea is to research

8. My dad expressed his opinion on my gaining weight: If I don't have Han Hong's life, I will get Han Hong's disease.

9. I have never deceived you, because I have never had the need to deceive you.

10. My ideal is a stunning beauty, and one day she will come to marry me riding a fire-breathing dinosaur, but I saw her mount, but not her owner.

11. Don’t be afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but be afraid of teammates who are like pigs!

12. You look so creative and live so courageously!

13. Many people have jumped off buildings recently, please be careful not to get hit.

14. Exercise your muscles to prevent getting beaten!

15. Judge: Why do you print counterfeit money? The defendant innocently said: Because I can’t print real money

16. Loneliness is the carnival of one person, and carnival is the loneliness of a group of people

17. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it.

18. Reduce the number of boys behind each girl to 6!

19. Look into my eyes, in addition to eye droppings, you will see perseverance and sincerity.

20. Lei Feng did not leave a name for his good deeds, but he recorded everything in his diary.

21. Don’t come to me if you have nothing to do, and don’t come to me if you have something to do!

22. In order to make the contract attractive, the contractor subtracted a tractor from it.

23. I am responsible for unloading a large pile of charcoal and coal at the coal mine.

24. I look at you smiling, silent, proud, and disappointed just like now, so I am happy with you and sad with you, but I have always stood in the present while you always stay in the past.

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25. I grew up watching Ai Iijima’s **, she died last year; I grew up watching Jackson’s MVs, and he also died this year; now, I decided to grow up watching CCTV

Super meaningful humorous jokes

1. The strong men among us strongly hate this bad thing.

2. Anything I can’t let go must be because I can’t have it~~

3. The reason why angels can fly is because they take themselves very lightly

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4. Stay independent and do not rely on anyone or anything, because when all the pillars of support leave, you will fall to the ground

5. The best way is not to blame him or hate him. . The other party is transparent and has a grudge that is more harmful than the enemy.

6. People like you who always talk about your achievements would have been shot during the Cultural Revolution.

7. What should you pay attention to when acting cute? Pay attention to your appearance

8. Most people learn Japanese to watch anime, most people learn Korean to follow celebrities, and most people learn French to pretend to be literary. English is mostly forced.

9. Someone said they hate me, and I immediately laughed. If you can make you unhappy, I feel very happy.

10. When you get married in the future, if the groom is not me, I will move in next door to your house and treat your children better than my own, until your husband doubts his life.

11. Making money is a kind of ability, spending money is a kind of skill. My ability is limited, but my skill is very high.

12. What eight words can make a man come to you rain or shine, just a phone call away? Come and have a drink, it’s all women!

13. The success achieved in recent years is mainly divided into Three categories: successful login, successful download, and successful payment.

14. Say, besides eating, what else can you do? You can also be hungry.

15. I heard that a beggar in Dubai earns 470,000 a month. How about a two-person trip to Dubai on the go? I will take you and you will take the bowl. I will be responsible for crying while you kneel and shout.

The most humorous jokes with classic connotations

1. Don’t compare yourself to me, I am too lazy to compare with you

2. When you are at a high place, raise your eyes Looking from afar, falling down, but still admiring quietly

3. Senior brother, did you know? Second senior brother’s meat is now more expensive than master’s meat

4. Sorry! I have already Dead! But thank you for coming to see me! I will come to see you at 12 o'clock tonight!

5. When I am drunk, I will not accept anyone, so I will support the wall!

6 . Play with your life: You can only play when you have your life. If your life is gone, what are you playing with?

7. I thought I was decadent, but it turned out that I was scrapped!

8 . Smoking disobeys, so we smoke.

9. How far a person can go depends on who he walks with; how good a person is depends on who he has to guide him; how successful a person is depends on who he has with him.

10. A hero has a hard time with a beauty. I am not a hero, but beauty helped me pass.

People who read the most connotative classic humorous sentences also read: Funny and connotative sentences Humorous and connotative sentences

Funny and connotative sentences (classics)

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1) Men think it is flirting, women think it is affection

2) Xia Yuhe said: Your Majesty, I waited for you by the Daming Lake and turned into a water monster

3) Didn’t grow up I'm so sorry for the way you like it

4) Let me wish you a happy Mother's Day: Hello, wife, you are the big leader in our family, Mother's Day is great, you celebrate the holiday, and I will provide labor insurance.

5) Your hypocrisy gradually makes me see your true face

6) If I can’t be Teletubbies and Spongebob, I will be Computer Baby.

7) Everything in this world can be fake, but the only thing I cannot tolerate is that the money in my hand is fake.

8) I bought a razor online, but my hands were shaking and numb before I finished shaving.

9) Before I could give up, I discovered the indifference behind the betrayal, and I didn’t know how to face it.

10) I haven’t weighed myself for half a year because of my heart. inside. have. number.

11) When I woke up, I thought I had grown taller, but it turned out that the quilt was stretched horizontally.

12) If the head shape is not firm, love is uncertain. The leather shoes are not bright and the target cannot be found.

13) How many times have I called it back when tears are about to flow out? When it sees my weakness, I will die.

14) It is a waste to have a body to build and retain.

15) Never learn from other people’s mouths whether the person you love is good or not. You know whether you feel loved or not.

Funny and meaningful sentences (popular articles)

< p> 1) I should have been less heartless than I am now.

2) My principle is that I will not offend others unless they offend me; if someone offends me, I will get angry.

3) I will make RMB in my next life so that you will never forget me

4) Tanks bound for spring!

5) Ten million Don't believe what the lyrics say. In order to make up the rhyme, they can write anything!

6) I want to write your name on the cigarette, inhale it into my lungs, and keep you in the place closest to me!

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7) Other women can lose weight, why can’t you! Are you an idiot? Are you born to be a fat pig?

8) A running snail.

9) What you can’t go back is the past, what you can’t reach is the future, and what you can grasp is the present.

10) As the saying goes: Rabbits don’t eat grass beside their nests; but as the saying goes: The one who is near the water and the tower first gets the moon!

11) When the teacher said, put the things that have nothing to do with the exam in On the podium, I just wanted to put myself up there.

12) No matter what I am insisting on, I also scold myself for being extremely naive.

13) The difference between you and a plate of shit is that you don’t have a plate

14) Chinese Valentine’s Day is here again. . . The first line: envy, jealousy, and hatred; the second line: emptiness, loneliness, and coldness; the horizontal line: paralysis that I am single.

15) Since ancient times, no one has died. If you want to die, you must die first

16) Top students show off their grades, goddesses show off their selfies, rich people show off their wealth, models show off their figures, and I return from vacation. Let’s bask in the sun at home!

17) At this age, the only thing I can afford but cannot put down is chopsticks.

18) I love myself, can I have more love rivals?

19) When I was a child, my family had no money, so I always flew a kite with a plastic bag tied behind a rope.

20) Gradually, I learned your speaking habits. Paranoia is not a liking, it is a habit.

Funny and meaningful sentences (latest)

1) [If you really frighten the toilet to the point of clogging, frighten the faucet to the point of crying, and make the incandescent lamp explode with anger, then I I can only worship you]

2) Beautiful spring scenery: The scenery in spring is bright and lovely. Example: The spring is bright and the flowers are blooming.

3) You said you still love me, do you have the persistence to love me?

4) Recently, various places have been challenging, and a girl talked about the heat in QQ chat, how to cool off. The person downstairs replied with two words: Sister, take off!

5) Doctor, please prescribe some regret medicine for me, and give me a cup of love-forgetting water.

6) Why do you talk like a child who is mentally retarded?

7) How many dark nights would I have to live without you.

8) Smiling at you is purely polite, don’t smile at me, you big face.

9) If you don’t like me, I will castrate you and become my sister.

10) Origin, I saw you in the crowd; Destiny, I saw you in the crowd

11) You secretly entered my room and had sex with me The bed is wandering around me and you want to kiss me. I'll slap you to death, damn mosquito!

12) I come quietly, leave quietly, wave my dagger, and leave no one alive.

13) People say that my sister is beautiful, but in fact it’s all because of her makeup.

14) [Don’t give up the lover around you because of the bitch passing by. ]

15) For me. When writing an essay, you just make up nonsense and bring a scratch paper with you.

16) If you see someone who is warm rather than hot in the summer, you probably like them.

17) The more you want something, the more you pretend to be indifferent; the more you are afraid of losing it , the more you pretend not to care.

18) Living is the last word.

19) A hero does not ask for a way out, and a gangster does not care about his age!

20) How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting inside the toilet or waiting outside the toilet.

People who have read funny and connotative sentences also read: Humorous and funny classic sentences with connotation

Humorous and funny classic sentences with connotation (Part 1)

< p> 1. You can steal my sentences or my expressions, but if you steal my heart, I will call you husband.

2. For the rest of my life, I will be thin and I will be rich.

3. Efforts to reject social rules are all ineffective efforts.

4. Being fat first is not called fat, but being fat later will overwhelm the kang.

5. It’s not that we didn’t catch the last train of happiness, it’s that we couldn’t get on it.

6. There are no friends in the workplace. Your boss is not your friend, and neither are your colleagues.

7. The word "grow up" doesn't even have the radical part in it, which makes you feel lonely at first glance.

8. Time will not dilute pain, time will only make people accustomed to pain.

9. It doesn’t matter if your head is empty, the key is not to get wet.

10. Parents are really magical creatures. They will believe any rumors in the circle of friends, but they will expose the lies you made up at a glance.

11. I once tried to close the refrigerator door slowly to see when the light inside went out.

12. Love is, if there is no better choice, I will accompany you until the end of the world.

13. Every time when you want to eat too much, just comfort yourself like this: Beauty or ugliness is up to fate, whether you are fat or thin depends on God, God wants me to be fat, so let God do it!

14. No matter what you face, since you have reached this point, persevere; give yourself some affirmation, you are stronger than you think.

15. No one’s luck comes out of thin air. Only when you work hard enough will you be lucky enough. The world will not let down every effort and persistence, and time will not neglect everyone who is persistent and brave! Humorous and funny classic sentences with connotation (Part 2)

16. In the eyes of my mother, the origin of all diseases is because of not drinking water, not eating vegetables, and not going to bed early.

17. If one day I block you, it’s not that I hate you, but that I really can’t afford what you are selling.

18. Just now, my partner suddenly sent me a message saying that we should break up. Before I had time to feel sad, he sent another message, sorry, I sent it to the wrong person. It scared me to death, I thought we were really going to break up.

19. Don’t envy us for having no homework during the holidays. Do you know how tiring it is to play for a day?

20. It is said that many people check the time in the morning not to get up, but to see if they can still sleep. how long.

21. Back then, he was ambitious to conquer the world, but now he retires just for him.

22. Listen to me, you have lost several times, but you will make a comeback.

23. When I hate someone, if that person suddenly says they like me, then I don’t hate them at all. He is so principled that he cannot hate a discerning person.

24. Problems that can be solved with money are not problems, but how to make money is your biggest problem.

25. Promises are like farts, earth-shattering at the time but pale and feeble afterwards.

26. My boyfriend is very considerate of me. In order not to disturb me, he has not come to see me for more than ten years, which is very heartwarming.

27. With your appearance, you don’t need to lose weight at all. Now you can still use fat as an excuse for being ugly. After you lose weight, you will have no excuses anymore.

28. Human potential is unlimited. Only by working hard can you know your true strength. Because the direction of the tree is determined by the wind. People decide their own direction.

29. In life, it is harder to face difficulties than to give up. For many things, you can't just let go if you want to, and you can't just give up if you want to. There are always some things in life that you clearly know are wrong, but you keep insisting on them, and you know that they are bad, but you keep guarding them.

30. As long as I work hard, there is nothing I can’t mess up.