A famous joke

A pawnshop in the city treats the pawns of the poor, which is cruel and despicable. The two kidnappers really want to punish them.

On this day, Erguai took a coat with 1000 patches to pawn. The pawnshop shopkeeper asked Mr. Accountant to write a receipt together.

Two copper coins were thrown to the second kidnapper.

A year later, the second kidnapper took the pawnbroker's ticket and the copper money due to him to smoke the broken jacket. But, man, I didn't find it.

It turned out that the two monsters could only pawn his tattered coat and could not smoke it, so they tore it into rags.

Two kidnappers are loose chanting:

The jacket is old and left for children and grandchildren.

Patch 3000 yuan, stitch 35000 yuan, sweat stained flowers, oily soil.

It is cool in summer and warm in winter.

The price converted into copper coins is enough for ten days.

The pawnshop had to apologize and finally gave him 30 taels of silver.

Niushangshu

Bu Kuan has been herding cattle for the rich man's family since he was a child. One day near the end of the year, the rich man said to him:

"You drive the cow to the mountain, and the cow should eat something green and tender."

Bu Kuan said, "Sir, the mountains are closed by heavy snow. Where do you want me to find a green and tender cow to eat? "

The rich man sneered: "The cow is hungry and thin in the circle, don't blame me for deducting your salary!"

Bukuan ran in a hurry, turned several hills, and finally found a tree full of green leaves. He pulled out the hook knife,

Cut off a blood vine, pass it through the nose of the cow, tie it around the neck of the cow, tie one end to the tree, and the other end falls to the ground. Everything is ready to stop.

When? When the rich come.

Sure enough, the rich man stepped on Bu Kuan's footprints. As soon as Bu Kuan saw it, he pulled the cow up the tree. The rich man shouted at Bu Kuan, and Bu Kuan got dressed.

He tugged at it and said, "Sir, open your eyes and have a look. Apart from the leaves of this glutinous rice tree, where is it green and tender? "

what's up If I don't pull the cow up the tree, won't you deduct my salary? "BuKuan said, and want to pull hard.

The rich man saw the Daniel who was tortured alive and had to say, "I'll take you!" " Put the cow down quickly. From now on, I swear never again.

Your salary has been deducted. "

Not wide-footed cattle

The cattle rent of the rich has doubled compared with last year. Bu Kuan's rent is not enough. He talked with the rich for a long time, and only the rich can

Promise to rent half a cow (that is, the cow raised by the tenant) to him.

Bukuan is very unhappy. When he was plowing, he saw the rich man come out to check, so he tied the plow to the left foot of a cow and pushed it hard.

Whip. Niu Yi panicked and rushed forward, but one foot was tied and he couldn't walk. Bu Kuan made a hullabaloo about and kept hitting cows.

The rich man cried bitterly, "Not wide! How did you make the cow like this! "

Bu Kuan said, "What does this have to do with you? If I rent half a cow, I can only plow the field with half a cow and only beat this half.

Body. I didn't hurt half a hair of your cow! "

The rich man had to say, "All right! Stop fighting, I'll rent you a cow! "

Three conditions

There was a rich man who was very strict with long-term workers, and no one who knew about it dared to work in his house.

One day, the rich man found Jia Kai and asked Jia Kai to work for a year. Open an idea and screw him. I won't say more about it.

In short, I agreed, but I put forward three conditions: "First, quit and go; Second, don't wear a square hat; Three, three together, I won't go. "

The rich man agreed. I didn't go to work until I had an appointment.

In a blink of an eye, it was time to sow seedlings. The rich man told Jia Kai to sow seedlings. When I opened my armor, I said, "I told you, I don't want to walk with my ass."

Fuck! "The rich man was speechless.

In the season of threshing millet, the rich man asked Jia Kai to carry a grain bucket to thresh millet. Jia Kai said:

"Not said? I don't wear a square hat! "

The rich man had to change his tune and say, "Well, go and pick up the millet."

Jia Kai said, "Boss, you forgot the terms you promised again! I won't leave if I say the three of us go together! "

The rich man said he could not beat him, so he had to act according to the contract.

Picking dung

One year, Jia Kai worked in a rich family. In March and April, the rich man told him to pick dung, but after a few days,

The rich man scolded him for his lack of strength, saying that picking dung was a light job. He went to pick dung and came back empty-handed, only for half a day.

Jia Kai thought, "Let him have a taste."

The next day, I unpacked a bag of dry and loose dung, picked it up again, picked it up again, until it was returned.

Is to take that pile of shit home and put it aside. It's been like this for several days. After the rich man knew it, he cursed loudly: "Kaijia! How to fight in the field these days?

No shit in the kitchen? Are you out of your mind? "

Jia Kai said, "didn't you say it was empty or light when you came back? What if I don't do this? "

The rich man roared, "You idiot! Just pick up two stones and come back! "

Jia Kai said, "You want me to pick dung, not stones!"

From then on, the rich man dared not look down on Jia Kai.

A pack of IOUs

One day, the same clan (in Shigatse, Tibet) Zongben Rongcuodewa said to his new servant Akodemba:

"Come, put this package IOUs back, to collect interest with me. When I come back with a full load, I will definitely reward you! "

Two people rode to a small river, the river is neither deep nor shallow, o knock demba said:

"Sir, I'm afraid I can't pass this pony."

Master Rong Cuodwa was angry: "Nonsense! There is no horse in my family that can't cross the river! "

When they were in the middle of the river, a Cobbaden deliberately pulled back the reins, twisted his body and fell into the water. When he climbed ashore,

The IOUs in the yellow kit are all wet. The master ordered Dunbar to dry them quickly, so Ako Dunbar spread out the wet IOUs, sprinkled sand on them and wiped them clean with his hands. After a while, the handwriting on the loan slip was blurred beyond recognition. The host cursed, and the naked Dunbar said, "I think the sand is boiling hot." You can do it faster! " "

Collect dung and practice.

One day, Dunbar went to the back of Potala Palace to collect dung with a basket without a bottom. The Lama reminded him, "Did you bring a basket?"

Ass, can you hold cow dung? "

Dunbar said with a smile, "I pick up cow dung like this, just like little lamas practice." The little Lama just recited scriptures and worshipped Buddha, hoping to die.