Funny animal jokes

1, dogs and pigs play together. Dog: "How much is one plus one?" Pig: "Two!" "Dog:" Wow! How clever you are! "Pig:" Of course, you think I'm a pig! ""2. There are parties in festivals, and fireflies are lighting effect engineers, flying together in the air. One of them didn't shine, and the other asked him curiously, "Brother! Why not shine? " The glowworm said, "Hey! Don't mention it, the electricity price has gone up again, and I still owe the electricity bill last month! " 3. "The temperature at the poles is getting higher and higher. Penguins and polar bears have left their territory. Finally, they met at the equator. Penguin said, Brother Bear, although the greenhouse effect saved us from the cold, this environment made my family almost extinct. The polar bear said, "Sister Penguin, don't be sad. Although we will disappear first, human beings will pay for what they have done. "4. The kitten was fishing by the river and was accidentally caught by a shallow crab. When the crab saw something bad, it quickly ran away. The kitten went on fishing and soon caught a shrimp. The kitten saw it and said, "Xiaoya, you are so thin in the blink of an eye, and the weight loss effect is good. "5. A cock fell in love with a hen, so he decided to invite the hen to dinner. The hen readily agreed and dressed up to attend. After dinner, the waiter asked the rooster to pay the bill. The rooster said, "It pays the bill today. The hen was dazed and said, "didn't you invite me to dinner?" The rooster said, "haven't you heard that the iron rooster has no money?" "I am a miser." 6. The dog and kitten went to court to sue for divorce soon after they got married. The elephant judge asked about their wishes. The puppy said, "The kitten doesn't go home every night. I suspect it is cheating! " The kitten is full of grievances and says, "I'm just chasing mice." Dog: "Look, it admits!" " "7. Mouse: I'm in love with bats now, and my children will live in the air from now on, not afraid of your cat. The cat sneered, pointed to the owl in the tree and said, look, she is pregnant with my child! 8. The mouse opened a storage company and soon found that goods were lost every day. So I invited a cat detective to investigate, and soon the truth came out. It turns out that the mouse is an inside job! 9. Toad fell in love with the swan, but he was afraid that the swan would dislike his ugliness, so he asked his cousin frog to date the swan instead of himself. As a result, the frog and the swan got married! 10. A snake in the jungle likes to eat the sparrow's nest while bypassing the trunk. Other snakes thought it was strange and asked why it wanted to eat Nestle. Only this snake gave the other snakes a white look: "Didn't you listen to what humans said?" Then I closed my eyes as if with endless aftertaste, slowly exhaled and sighed, "Nestle coffee is delicious! ""1 1. There is a young mosquito in the air. The spider saw it and said, "handsome boy, come to my house and have a rest." Mosquito said, "Do you have anything interesting there?" The spider said, "Yes, I opened an Internet cafe. Please go online! " "Hearing this, the mosquito plunged into the past. ................................ asked: Let me laugh eight times and you win. Q: Anything else? Answer: No! ╮(￣▽￣")╭