The first time I went to my boyfriend's house, I was bossed around. The woman broke up decisively. Did she do the right thing?

The world is vast, and there are many customs around us that we don't know much about. Many times, it will make people feel incredible.

Just like "circumcision" in some parts of Africa, it sounds really cruel to women, but it is an unwritten custom in many poor and underdeveloped areas of Africa. If a woman does not perform this ceremony, it will be considered unclean.

For us, it is unreasonable, but for local people, it is used to it. This bad habit cannot be completely changed easily by ourselves. We can only expect more people to understand and resist it and completely change it in a few years.

Similarly, there are many such bad habits around us, for example, in some rural areas, women are not allowed to serve meals, or other customs that degrade women's status, all of which are due to the contempt of society for women.

We are glad that we live in a new era, an era of gradual equality between men and women, but we must also admit that there are still many such bad habits around us.

So what would you do if you met him? Will resist? Or will you accept it?

This happened to Miss Lin, the protagonist of my article today, the first time she went to her boyfriend's house. They were going to get married, but she couldn't accept it and broke up.

I don't think Miss Lin did anything wrong. Stopping it in time is the best way to protect yourself. What would you do if it were you?

02

Miss Lin and her boyfriend Mr. Li have been in love for more than a year. Miss Lin is a local, and Mr. Li came to this city after the college entrance examination. Miss Lin knows that Mr. Li's family is from the countryside, but she thinks there is no distinction between high and low birth. As long as this person is good, there will be no problem.

Although Miss Lin's parents are not satisfied with the boy's family, they feel that it should not be a big problem to be far away and their daughter will not have to go back often in the future. Besides, Mr. Li is really good to Mr. Lin. He always comes back with Mr. Lin on holidays and always takes the initiative to help. Miss Lin's parents looked at this down-to-earth and capable young man and felt that her daughter's choice should not be wrong.

In this way, their relationship has been smooth. More than a year later, Mr. Li proposed to Miss Lin. Miss Lin thought she was about the same age and agreed.

Since we are going to get married, we have to go to our future mother-in-law's house to recognize the door. Mr. Li and Miss Lin found a holiday and came to Mr. Li's house with many gifts prepared by Miss Lin's parents in advance.

Mr Li lives in a small mountain village. He is the first college student in the village, which is the glory of the whole family. This time, he will bring back a city girlfriend. His parents are even more happy to prepare a banquet in advance and invite many people to celebrate together.

03

Although she was psychologically prepared before coming, when she arrived at Mr. Li's house, Miss Lin was still a little uncomfortable. Earth house, hot kang, dry toilet and dirt road all make her feel completely different from her living environment.

However, Mr. Lin understands that you marry a chicken and follow a dog. She told herself that she would only come here occasionally anyway and would not live here often. She should respect Mr. Li, her future in-laws, and be a good daughter-in-law and wife.

In this way, Miss Lin put down her things and followed Mr. Li awkwardly, feeling a little more down-to-earth in her heart. But soon, the future mother-in-law and a group of aunts told Mr. Li that the men were all in the house, so you should go and play with them, and then take Miss Lin with you.

Miss Lin was a little flustered, but watching Mr. Li leave without looking back, she couldn't say anything more, so she had to follow her future mother-in-law

A group of them took Miss Lin to the kitchen, and then began to enthusiastically pull her to pick vegetables and cook. Miss Lin is not the kind of Miss Jiao who doesn't eat human fireworks. Her mother taught her from an early age that girls should be able to do housework, not let you serve anyone in the future, but have the ability to live at any time.

Before coming, Mr. Lin had thought it over. She can't do a lot of work too actively, but she won't do nothing arrogantly, so she accepted the food happily.

While working, she heard several aunts say to her future mother-in-law: "Your daughter-in-law is ok, don't be too delicate." Teacher Lin smiled and said nothing.

When the meal was ready, Miss Lin began to help carry it into the house. She was very excited to see Mr. Li sitting cross-legged on the kang drinking with a group of men. When she saw her, she didn't even ask if you were tired or hungry. Do you want to take a break and eat some rice? Instead, she said, "Go and get some peanuts."

This makes teacher Lin feel a little uncomfortable. She doesn't think there is anything wrong with her work. She just thinks that Mr. Li will accompany him when he goes to his house, no matter what he does. How can he go home and leave himself alone to give orders?

But, ah, after all, it's my first time here, and Mr. Lin is not very angry, so I thought I'd put up with it and deal with you when I got back. But what happened next finally failed to make Mr. Lin hold back.

04

After driving so far, Miss Lin, who was as busy as a bee when she entered the door, was so hungry that she put her chest against her back and dragged her tired body into the house for dinner.

However, as soon as she entered, she found that everyone was looking at her with surprised eyes. She didn't quite understand what it meant and froze in place.

At this moment, Mr. Li said to her, "How did you come in?" She looked at Mr. Li's face, which she had never seen before. She was too angry to come in.

The future mother-in-law quickly pulled her out, walked into the kitchen and said to her, "Girl, what are you doing in there?" That's where men eat. Let's have something to eat here when they are finished. "

Miss Lin's eyes are about to fall out at this. What do you mean? I've worked hard to cook a lunch, and now I can't eat it in the house. Do I have to wait for them to finish?

For Miss Lin, this is really a scene that can only be seen in TV series. Feudalism is frightening. She doesn't believe in such bad habits in modern society at all.

She walked out of the kitchen without saying a word, stood at the door of the main house and said to Mr. Li, "Come out for a moment." Seeing Miss Lin's dark face, Mr. Li suddenly felt a little guilty and hurried to get out of bed, but he was pulled on the bed by his future father-in-law. He pulled a face and said, "A woman dares to boss you around like this. For example, what, she doesn't know the rules, and neither do you? "

Hearing this, Mr. Li took a look at Miss Lin, sat down again and said to her sullenly, "What do you want me to do? This is where men talk, and women don't interrupt. "

Say that finish, he lowered his head and looked at Miss Lin out of the corner of his eye. Miss Lin was so angry that she couldn't speak. All the men in the room looked at Mr. Li approvingly.

At this moment, teacher Lin is a little desperate. She feels that the man in front of her and the Mr. Li she knows are not the same person at all, but which one is the real him?

05

Miss Lin turned back to the house to pack her things and left without looking back. Her future mother-in-law stopped her for a long time. Mr. Li wanted to chase her, but she was scolded by her future father-in-law and had to give up.

Miss Lin walked down the country road in tears, and it took a long time to stop the car. On the way, she made up her mind to break up, because her in-laws can't change themselves in the future, but she can't accept that her future husband doesn't love her, so there is no principle and no bottom line. How can she become her own dependence in the future?

Miss Lin, who came home, cried and said this, and her parents were particularly distressed. The daughter who was held in her palm was bullied like this, which made people angry, but still did not understand. How did the boy, who usually seems to be very sensible and obedient to his daughter, get to the rural home as if he were possessed?

Two days later, Mr Li came back. He came to apologize with a lot of things, so he knelt down. He explained that he really had no choice that day. His hometown is very traditional. Men are superior to women and cannot disobey their elders. Everyone is used to this kind of life. He didn't expect Teacher Lin to be so resistant. If he knew, he would tell her in advance.

After listening to his words, Miss Lin strengthened her determination to break up, because this man didn't think it was a bad habit in his bones. He thinks it's normal. It's her problem that Miss Lin can't accept it.

What does this mean? It shows that this bad habit is engraved in his bones. Now he is still in the love stage, and he hasn't touched so many things, so there will be too many such contradictions in his later life. At that time, this man will show his true colors.

Parents also agree with teacher Lin's decision. They also think that marriage is not about two people, but about two families. If the daughter marries such a family, she will definitely suffer in the future. It is better to forget it now, so as to avoid endless future trouble.

In this way, Mr. Lin and Mr. Li broke up with some regret, but I think this is also the best ending. Look at different people, don't be too strong, otherwise it will only bring disaster to each other, not happiness.

06

After listening to teacher Lin's story, let's go back to the original question. What will you do if the person you love has bad habits that you can't accept?

I support teacher Lin's approach. If you find that you can't accept it, leave decisively and don't gamble, because in most cases, you can't win. Some bad habits are hard to change if they are engraved in that person's bones, just like Mr. Li. If he really thinks there is a problem, he should tell Mr. Lin earlier, and then he should protect Mr. Lin that day, so that she can feel safe and let everyone understand.

I believe what Mr. Lin cares about most is not what Mr. Li's parents and the whole village do, but his attitude. After all, he is the one who wants to live his own life. If this person has three incorrect views, he will not be happy in the future.

For people like Mr. Li, we respect the customs of your hometown, but you should also respect the customs that others can't accept, and stand in a more just position to balance this matter, instead of asking one of them to compromise.

You know, some girls can suffer with you, but what they want is your attitude, but you are willing to fight against the whole world for her.

Just like Gu in Do You Know If It Should Be Red, Fat, Green and Thin, why do people like him so much? It is precisely because of his protection of Ming Lan that the whole world knows that if I protect her, no one can bully her.

That is, with such self-confidence, she will live a free and easy life and try her best to protect her, which is the happiest thing in a woman's life.

Therefore, I hope men understand that the reason why a woman will leave you must be that she has saved up enough disappointment. Don't say that she is not considerate, don't blame her for not caring for you, think more about what you gave her.

Anyway, most of the women I have met can accompany their loved ones through all the hardships. As long as this person is willing to give himself sincerity, it is enough.

Finally, tell all the girls that if you find a man has a problem, no matter when you choose to stop loss, it will not be too late, because the right to happiness is in your own hands, and finding someone who loves you and respects you is more important than anything else.