Douyin funny and humorous quotes (selected 40 sentences)

1. Selfies are like this: 30% of them are determined by nature, and 70% of them depend on filters.

2. The mermaid is fake, at least it definitely did not exist in Chinese history, otherwise the cooking methods and taste effects would have been passed down.

3. When I was a child, my father often told me stories about how he went out to work when he was about 10 years old and took on a heavy burden for the family. After listening to this, I secretly swore in my heart that when I grow up, I will be like my father and become a A very good braggart.

4. Heroes don’t ask where they come from. Love finds my speed.

5. Back then, he was ambitious to conquer the world, but now he retires just for him.

6. You ignore me today, but I will come to see you tomorrow.

7. My girlfriend and I introduced my brother and her best friend together. Later, they quarreled and broke up. My girlfriend defended her best friend, so I defended my brother vigorously. Well, you guessed it right, we have broken up now.

8. People like the spring breeze and hate the cold wind. In fact, the cold wind is innocent, it is the temperature that is causing trouble!

9. I would rather be fat and exquisite than be thin and similar.

10. After getting to know you, a sense of intellectual superiority arises spontaneously.

11. It’s very hot, right? It will get cooler on Chinese Valentine’s Day.

12. There is a kind of longing called looking forward to wearing autumn water, and there is a kind of cold called forgetting to wear autumn trousers.

13. People don’t listen to me when I confess my love on Valentine’s Day. People don't believe me if I confess my love on April Fool's Day. Confessing love on Qingming Festival is not something others should do.

14. If you don’t like me, you can choose to hit me, or you can choose to pretend to be blind.

15. You say it’s because the weather is cold, but I say it’s because my heart is cold.

16. Don’t compare yourself to me, I’m too lazy to compare with you!

17. The worst time to get hurt is when you go out without any money in your pocket!

< p> 18. When you feel scared at night, look under the bed. Remember, you are not alone.

19. Once upon a time, there was a hide-and-seek company, and their boss has not found it yet.

20. A man is like a dog. Whoever has the ability can lead him away.

21. At the same age as a flower, it has grown into a fleshy flower.

22. If I can forgive you for being vulgar, can you forgive me for being pretentious?

23. After the holiday, my daily state is quite regular. In the morning, He looked like he hadn't woken up. In the afternoon, he looked like he couldn't wake up. In the evening, he looked like he had taken a blood shot.

24. If poverty limits your imagination, why can you still come up with so many ways to save money?

25. Thinking of me too complicated means that you also not simple.

26. I wanted to look back and smile at the male god, but I didn’t expect that the weather was too cold, so I laughed out loud.

27. Sometimes being fat is also a kind of beauty. At least I am fat but not greasy.

28. I only have one requirement when looking for a partner: to get along well with my other partners.

29. I don’t like you, like the neighbor who ate Sichuan peppercorns and numbed the next door.

30. Although I will not die if I admit defeat, I will not admit defeat even if I die.

31. Missing is a short-term regret; mistake is a permanent regret.

32. It’s really too hot today. I want to find someone to have a cold war with for a few days.

33. There is only one worry when you are not full, but there are countless worries when you are full.

34. People must not treat themselves badly when they are alive. For example, losing weight is too far away from me. It is more practical to eat meat in a bowl.

35. There are no obstacles in this world that cannot be overcome, only obstacles that cannot be overcome.

36. If you are willing to open my homework layer by layer, you will find that you will be surprised. This page is not written, and that page is not written.

37. When I came home from college during the holidays, my mother cooked a table of delicious food for me. My dad said, "Let's eat as much as you want, just treat it as your own home!"

38. Why are you pretending to be in the city? People are now called villages on the earth.

39. I am really lucky. I am very grateful to have known these sincere friends for many years, and their attitude towards me has never changed. For example, there was no Mid-Autumn Festival gift last year, and there is still no Mid-Autumn Festival gift this year.

40. Rainy days are suitable for sleeping at home, sunny days are suitable for going out for a walk. For a long time, there is no day suitable for going to work.