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Collect famous jokes!
Guess what the polar bear said when he opened the door? ..... "Let's go to your house to play ~"
2. The little white rabbit skipped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"
Boss: "Oh, sorry, not that much."
"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay.
The next day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"
Boss: "Sorry, there is still no"
"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay again.
On the third day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"
The boss said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today! ! "
The little white rabbit took out the money: "Great, I'll buy two!" " "
Ming Dow Jr.: "Kang, let me ask you something." A shark ate a mung bean. What did it become? 」
Kang said, "I don't know. What is the answer? 」
Xiao Ming said, "Hey! Hey! The answer is "green bean paste (mung bean shark)", you are stupid! 」
The teacher asked a classmate how to reduce white pollution.
Make the lunch box blue.
6. On the plane, a stewardess asked a little girl, "Why didn't the plane hit the stars when it was flying so high?"
The little girl replied, "I know, because the stars will shine!" " "
7. There is a polar bear playing with a penguin. Penguins pull out his hair one by one. After pulling it out, he said to the polar bear, "It's so cold!" "When the polar bear heard this, he tore off his hair one by one and turned to the penguin and said," It's really cold! "
8. There is a loaf of bread. I was hungry when I walked, so I ate by myself.
9. Q: What do African cannibals eat?
A: people!
Q: Then one day, the chief fell ill and the doctor told him to be a vegetarian. What did he eat?
A: Eat vegetables! ~~
10. American: Have you ever seen a cup made of wood?
China: No!
American: Then why is the Chinese character "cup" beside the wooden character?
China people: Isn't there a word "no" next to the word "cup"? In other words, it is not made of wood.
1 1. Xiaobai+Xiaobai =?
White rabbits (two) ~!
12. Q: What happens when a fat man falls from 12?
fat person
13. Asun and appa have nothing to talk about, and time waits for no one.
A song: "Recalling childhood, the happiest thing is Children's Day."
Apa: "Youth Day is in ten years."
A song: "Father's Day is in ten years."
Apa: "It will be the days of the elderly in a few decades."
A song: "In a few decades."
Appa: Tomb-Sweeping Day.
14. When the millionaire drove past a village in a luxurious extended Lincoln, he saw two beggars pulling grass at the roadside and stopped immediately.
"Why do you eat grass?"
"We really have no money ..." A beggar replied.
"Really, get in the car and go to my house."
"I have a wife and two children at home ..." A beggar complained.
"Call 1, and the rich man points to another beggar." And you, call your family. "
"My family has a large population. Besides my wife, there are five children! Are you proud of this?
"It doesn't matter, make a phone call, go!
In this way, two beggars and their families got on the bus, but fortunately it was an extended bus. On the way to exercise, a beggar's wife said gratefully, "Boss, it's very kind of you to invite even poor people like us to our home."
The millionaire replied, "Nothing, I just came back from abroad, and my house has been neglected.". The lawn in the yard may be more than one meter high and you can eat enough. "
15. One day, at the height of the national war, the guild leader came to the front of the grassland to boost morale. ...
The guild leader asked: What's the situation?
Report to the member archers: report to the head! There is a Bezos archer beside the tent 20 meters ahead, but his accuracy is poor. He has shot many times these days, but he didn't hit anyone.
After listening to this, the colonel asked: Since we have found the enemy archer, why not kill him?
The archer said: Report to the team leader! No, don't you want them to exchange it for a more accurate one?
16. Soldier: "Thirst … Thirst …"
Cao Cao: "Hold on a little longer! I have been to this place before, and I remember there is a Merlin nearby. It may be just a short journey.
Soldier: "Oh! There are plums to eat! Oh! "
Half an hour later-Coss: "Master! The expedition found a lot of water! "
Cao Cao: "Ha ha ha ha, did you hear that? Finally, there is water to drink. "
Soldier: "If you don't go ... you must find Plum ..."
17. A girls' school is haunted.
One day I was met by Xiaohong.
The ghost said: junior. . . Look at that. . . I have no feet. . . I have no feet. . .
Xiaohong: That's nothing. Listen, senior, I don't have breasts. I have no breasts.
18. A medium-rare steak and a medium-rare steak met in the street. Why don't they say hello? (assuming they can talk)
because ....................
because ........................
Because they are strangers ~ ~! Ha ha laugh
20. The little snake asked the big snake brother in a panic .. "Brother, are we poisoned?" The serpent said, "Why do you ask?" The little snake said, "I accidentally bit my tongue just now."
22. tortoise and rabbit race ... the rabbit quickly ran to the front. ..
The tortoise saw a snail crawling slowly .. and said to him, come up, I'll carry you. ..
Then, the snail came up. ..
After a while, the tortoise saw another ant and said to him, come up, too. ..
So the ants came up. .
When the ant came up, he saw the snail on it and greeted him.
Do you know what the snail said?
Snail said: hurry up, this turtle is so fast. ...
26. Every time I see you wearing stockings. ...
There will be an indescribable feeling in my heart,
namely ...
Radish is also wrapped in plastic wrap!
27. One day, a mother-in-law took a bus.
Sitting halfway, my mother-in-law doesn't know the way.
My mother-in-law spanked the driver with a stick and said, where is this?
Driver: This is my ass.
28.a: "I'll take you to a place where all girls don't wear bras."
B: "Really? Where is it? Take me away! "
A: "It's in the kindergarten next door!"
29. One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountain to pick fruit.
He announced: "children, we can wash the fruit together after picking it, and we can eat it together after washing."
All the children went to pick fruit.
As soon as the assembly time came, all the children got together.
Teacher: "Xiaohua, what do you have?"
Xiaohua: "I am washing apples because I picked them."
Teacher: "What about you, Xiaomei?"
Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked tomatoes."
Teacher: "The children are great! What about Amin? "
A-Ming: "I'm washing cloth shoes because I stepped on shit."
30. Bad news: A pilot fell off the plane.
Good news: He brought a parachute.
Bad news: the parachute is broken.
Good news: There is a haystack below.
Bad news: There is a dung fork on the haystack.
Good news: he didn't fall on the dung fork.
Bad news: He didn't fall on the haystack either.
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